Originally Posted by petey44
Again, don't know if the OP meant it like this, but it sounded like she was saying that most if not all WOHMs are at least somewhat like that. Which is, of course, not true. But we can only make our judgments based on what we have experienced, and if a person has limited experience with another subgroup, and that experience has been negative, the person is more than likely going to extend that judgment to everyone in that subgroup.
for an argument.
Thats not what I meant, I was only explaining that there are people in this world whose parenting view differ GREATLY from most of ours, but we tend to focus on our differences. Its like playing against people who are on your same team.
Originally Posted by sewchris2642
Unless your child is the "one in x" that the statistics talk about, it really doesn't matter in the long run, barring outright abuse/abject poverty, what parenting decisions parents decide on for their children. And that is a very humbling thought. (General) we want to believe that the decisions and sacrifices we make for our children will result in superior adults. And it isn't necessarily so. There have been successful adults who come from horrendous abuse/abject poverty, raised by nannies,etc. and the reverse is also true. The 'mommy wars" will end when we all realize that we all are collectively doing the best we can with the resources and children we have. And remember that expert advices changes as well as laws over the years as more information is discovered and old information is modified.
Im sorry, but I just dont believe that. There are A LOT of parents who are not doing the best they can. My mother was one of them. I remember several times when people at the grocery store or in other public places would tell my mom things like "dont pull her up by the arm like that" or "hey, dont smack her, she is just a baby" or "you know if you let your kids drink coke out of a bottle their teeth will rot out" or "gosh, you all are at McDonald's everytime Im here, do you ever eat at home?" along with many other remarks that embarrassed me and my four siblings. She always bitched the whole way home "Why do they think they have the right to tell me how to parent my kids? What the f---, mind your own business" and other nice things...
My brother and sister both have rotten teeth and have since they were little, and its because she fed them sugar and didnt force them to brush, not because they have "bad teeth".
My mother hit all of us all the time, including when we were as young as 6 months old.
My brother did have his shoulder pulled out of socket as a result of her yanking him up by the arm
We DID eat fast food every night and all of us struggle with weight
But god forbid you try to tell her anything, especially that breastmilk is better for a baby than formula. Because she will let you know that she's "got better things to do than sit around with a baby stuck to her tit all day long."
and she wasnt on drugs, she wasnt an alcoholic, she was married with 5 kids and came from an upper middle class background. She thought she knew it all, and she was a horrible parent. To this day, she cant take advice or criticism about her parenting styles.
I just dont believe everyone is doing the "best they can." There are a lot of people who put their own wants and needs above that of their children.