Confused about birth spacing

[LillianB]

My daughter is 6 months old and DH and I are trying to figure out when we can start trying for #2. We are both older first-time parents (I'm 39, he's 50) and I worry that our window of opportunity is closing quickly. It took us 9 months to conceive baby girl. After 67 hours of labor, my planned home birth turned into a csection. 

The OB who did the section told me that I should not get pregnant again for at least 18 months unless I'm planning another section and then it doesn't matter as much. My midwife tells me that it should be 18 months between births if I want to try a VBAC and that we can start trying in 3 months when our daughter will me 9 months.

I'm also aware of recent research examining the role of birth spacing in autism diagnoses. I was thinking we should wait until our girlie is a year and then start trying (which would give me several months of charting/BBT data to work with). But is that too soon? Or is it too late given our ages?

Any thoughts, opinions and wisdom would be most appreciated.

[MountainMamaGC]

If you want to VBAC, I would wait till she is 9 months. You dont want to give them any excuses and its only 3 months away. It could happen the first month you try but it may not be the case, so you may get your wish of DD being a year old anyway.

[dejagerw]

I'm not sure if you're nursing or not, but if you are do be aware that when you become pregnant your milk will likely dry up. Since your LO is less than 1 year, you will have to supplement with formula. This is just something to keep in mind if breastfeeding your LO is important to you.

Also, just because it took you a long time to get pregnant 1st time around, does not mean that it will be the same this time around. It took me 9 months to conceive my first, and I got pregnant the first time we tried with #2. My neighbor had fertility issues and was on Clomid to get pregnant with #1. Her #2 is due soon right when her #1 turns 1.5. 

Whatever you decide to do just focus on getting yourself as healthy as possible now to be ready for the next baby. Eating right, exercising, taking your vitamins, will help to keep you healthy and ready to conceive whenever you decide is the right time to try. :)

[kltroy]

Originally Posted by dejagerw 

I'm not sure if you're nursing or not, but if you are do be aware that when you become pregnant your milk will likely dry up. Since your LO is less than 1 year, you will have to supplement with formula. This is just something to keep in mind if breastfeeding your LO is important to you.

I disagree here - lots of us mamas nursed successfully through a second pregnancy.  Granted, my LO was a bit older when I conceived, but I think as long as you continue to nurse on demand and don't stress about it your LO will get enough.  Plus, she will be old enough to start taking some solids, which will help a bit.  (Note that everyone's body is a bit different - I do know some mamas who had troulbe w/ production once they were pregnant, so be aware of the possibility, but IME it's not the case with everyone).

That said, I agree that you might as well wait another 3 months before you get serious about TTC.  GOod luck to you!

[dejagerw]

Originally Posted by kltroy 

I disagree here - lots of us mamas nursed successfully through a second pregnancy.  Granted, my LO was a bit older when I conceived, but I think as long as you continue to nurse on demand and don't stress about it your LO will get enough.  Plus, she will be old enough to start taking some solids, which will help a bit.  (Note that everyone's body is a bit different - I do know some mamas who had troulbe w/ production once they were pregnant, so be aware of the possibility, but IME it's not the case with everyone).

That said, I agree that you might as well wait another 3 months before you get serious about TTC.  GOod luck to you!

With pregnancy it is not about supply and demand. Hormones from pregnancy cause a drop in supply. Most moms will completely dry up during pregnancy. This does not mean babies all wean during pregnany. Since nursing is for comfort as well, most babies will continue to nurse throughout pregnany. However, for a baby < 1 year breastmilk or formula should be their primary source for nutrition, thus formula will likely be needed if mom gets pregnant before baby is 1 year old.

[LadyCatherine185]

there is no way of knowing if your milk will dry up during pregnancy or not.. but i have always had issues with oversupply, and when i became pregnant with DS2 (and DS1 was about 18 months old) my milk dried up pretty quickly