Glad you both think it was a good thing. Thanks, ladies.
Jeez louis! These people are bat sh*t !!! It sounds like the parents did this to their children. Your daughter's grandparents are so disfunctional, it's no wonder their kids turned out as crummy as they did. I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I JUST got out of a semi-abusive relationship, where the "blame" is on me that we aren't together, but I know he was controlling and mean to my daughter, and made me cry dan near everyday. I'm 5 months pregnant with his son, and I know it'll be hell as far as custody because his mom is pushy and he does exactly what she says. He really wanted this baby to be a boy, because he has two older girls.
BUT if I were you, I would get things set up in court so that there is a visitation plan. If they miss out on their visits that are outlined by the courts, then they have to wait until the next one that the court says is okay to visit. I would get a limited restraining order so they can't just come stalk on you. this whole thing sounds extremely disturbing and I hope you can get it resolved.
I learned THIS the hard hard HARD way! I stayed with my ex boyfriend as long as I did (almost 6 months) because I was afraid what others, especially his family/friends would think of me, and even what my family thought of me already for even being with him. As soon as I grew a backbone and started thinking of what was best for me and my kids, I got the HELL OUT and have ceased contact thus far.