I had my gorgeous DD2 5 weeks ago and unfortunately ended up with a 3b tear. It was sewn up in theatre with a spinal block and I feel like I'm healing fine with no continence problems. I do have a cystocele (vaginal prolapse) which I know I need to see my GP about but that's a separate (ish) issue I think. I've got an appointment booked for the hospital the week after next, this is a standard thing they do for 3rd and 4th degree tears. I am really freaking out about the idea of having an internal exam, apparently this is what usually happens at these appointments as well as a rectal exam which I'm even more worried about. Just thinking about it makes me cry. I'm so worried it's going to hurt and I am mortally embarassed about the whole thing. I don't know who the Dr will be and won't know until I turn up, if it's the consultant I don't like him and also he's got really big hands . Even if it's not him it's quite likely to be a man and I would much prefer it was a woman. Thinking about the appointment makes me feel sick, I desperately don't want to go.
Not much point to this thread really but would appreciate some support!