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(x-posted in health & Healing)
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I am 99.9% certain I have endometriosis. The only reason I'm not 100% is because I haven't been officially diagnosed via laprscopy. (Actually, I don't intend to be either...I am certain enough that I'm just treating my body as I would if I HAD been diagnosed, since I wouldn't pursue surgical treatments anyway...but anyway, that's not really up for debate since that's not what I'm asking about). Since I was about 16 years old I always figured I had (or would have) endo. My dad's mom had it and my mom's sister had the worst case her doctors had ever heard of, resulting in a complete hysterectomy, plus some. But anyway, my periods were always bad- long, heavy, clotty, and horrible cramps. I do admit to being very careless (albeit out of ignorance) with my diet and by using lots of tampons (super supers) and disposable pads. After we got married, I had two miscarriages when I was 19 and 20. Then we got pregnant with my daughter and I had two more babies after her (my youngest is now 15 months). After my first daughter, though, I started using the Diva Cup with or alternating with cloth pads (anymore though I mostly just use the pads). My periods really improved, too. They weren't quite as long, not as heavy for as many days, and not nearly as painful.
Fast forward to a few months ago, in April. I got pregnant and lost the baby only days later. It was EXCRUCIATINGLY painful. I kept thinking it was ectopic. THe pain was horrible, like severe gas pain, and was pretty constant on the second day and gradually lightened on day 3 and by day for I was just sore, left over from the pain. This is on TOP of regular cramps, mind you (so the pain wasn't actual cramping). Going to the bathroom made me want to die from the pain. My bleeding seemed clottier, as well. Anyway, once it was all over, I just attributed it to the miscarriage. Then came my next period. OMGosh, the same awful pain. That's when I knew. There was no mistaking it. I already knew enough about endo to be pretty certain, but there were other things that pointed to it as well (for example, I have a LOT of trouble with systemic candida, which goes hand-in-hand with endo many times). I got pregnant again the next cycle only to lose that baby a few days later as well (over my 26th birthday, no less).Â
I guess what I don't understand is why, all of a sudden, it got SO bad. I went from having bad periods to good (for me, but bad in comparison to others, it seems) periods, to HORRIBLE periods. The only thing I can figure is that maybe it's related to my sons birth, which was another unassisted homebirth, even though it went perfectly. We had NO complications other than he took his sweet time- 6 hours- AFTER I was complete (he may have been asynclictic, but he was also 9lbs 10oz with a 15.5" head so there was a lot of him to get through there LOL Thank goodness I was at home or I KNOW they would have sectioned me at a hospital!!). Just like with my other births, there was no excessive bleeding, no trauma, no issues whatsoever. So there's no real reason to believe something happened then that caused this, but if it wasn't, then why?? (unless it is SOLELY related to my candida issues, which I've struggled with since about 8 months before I got pregnant with him, but wasn't a problem- at least of this magnitude- with my other pregnancies/births)
The other thing is that I keep hearing things about "risks" of natural birth (and therefore homebirth) with endometriosis. Clearly I'm much worse than I was when pregnant/giving birth to my last three. But does it really create a dangerous environment for birth? I seem to be finding mixed responses to that. I just cannot imagine giving up my homebirths. If it IS slightly riskier I can try to find a MW (options are few and far between here), but the thought of birthing in a hospital again makes me feel kind of ill. (I have nothing against others who prefer hospital births- after all, birthing where MAMA is comfortable is extremely important- but for me, being at home is HUGE and has a massive impact on how I labor)
Thoughts?
(I'm trying a few new things this cycle in hopes that if I DO get pregnant (we don't TTC but we also don't TTA), so praying they help if I do!!)
