delete

[msan]

deleted.

Edited by msan - 6/29/11 at 1:14pm

[Momofplenty]

Its his house. If you were to offer to buy him alternatives and tend to the lawn yourself, I'd say go for it...but it's not your house. It's not your lawn. How would you feel if he came to your house and offered you papers on what you were doing wrong?

[msan]

wow. Very nice this morning.  Please note, we are talking about the children's safety here.  

[Momofplenty]

Im aware but its not your house. Again, I say if you're going to pay for the upkeep and products, fine, but you didn't mention that being something you want to do. Maybe he can't/doesn't want to pay for the more expensive lawn products when he feels the ones he's using at HIS home are working to achieve the desired effect. Not to mention, your car is sprayed with junk, your house is sprayed with junk in the walls, your food packaging has chemicals, the air you breathe has waaaaaaay worse in it...why mess with someone that's obviously caring, doting, and has a good heart and mind to open his home and yard to your kid and his other grandkids?

[Momofplenty]

I think people look for things to be unhappy about.

[AllyRae]

I agree with MomofPlenty...it's not your house, nor your lawn, and you can't expect him to live up to your standards about it (BTW, EVERY park you go to and play on probably has chemicals on it too. ;-) ).  You can offer to buy him an organic version, or you can find out the waiting period before the chemicals will no longer transfer to skin.  Other than that, the only thing you can do is tell him that you don't want your children on his lawn and that you can meet at your house or something.  But, nobody has the right to tell someone else how to care for his lawn.  He might prize a golf course type lawn, and as the homeowner, that's his choice.  You can make the parenting choices for your child, which might involve not going on the lawn if that's what you believe is best.  Unfortunately, there's really no appropriate way to tell someone else what to do with their home, lawn, or food.  I've tried the natural versions, and they are very expensive and don't work as well (or require very very frequent applications, such as after every rain)...that's not something I should force anyone else to do.  (I gave up and now just have a clover lawn. LOL!).  If what he wants is a pristine lawn, that's his perogative since he pays the bills there.  I don't like the chemicals too, but I certainly won't tell someone else what to do.  And honestly, we still play at parks and playgrounds, and you can guarantee all the nice looking parks with not a weed in sight and are bright green use chemicals on it...

[TCMoulton]

I agree - it's not your lawn to dictate what is applied to it. If you want to avoid exposure find out when he applies it and then follow the manufacturer instructions for length of time to remain off the lawn.

[msan]

well, that will teach me to ever post anything on the mothering forum again.

I was just looking for information, a link. Not judgment.  For the record, I would be willing to purchase whatever was necessary to be safer and not make things more difficult for him.

I'd appreciate it if the moderators would delete this thread.

[TCMoulton]

I don't see any judgement just people being reasonable about your situation. If you really are willing to pay for the additional cost I would suggest approaching your father in law with your offer, understanding that it will be more work for him in the long run.

[dejagerw]

OP, sorry you feel people are being judgmental. I'm sure all you really wanted were people giving you links about how bad lawn treatments are, and agreement about how awful it is he's spraying chemicals all over where your kids play.

TBH, we try to be as "green" as possible. But we do use lawn treatments. We're sure our kids don't play on the lawn after the treatments. But really, I know of most people in the neighborhood have treatments done, and I can't always keep DS1 off other people's yards when kids are out playing. I don't always know when other people do the treatments, but if I see one of those little signs on the yard, or those little pellets on the sidewalk, I'll keep DS off. (But when he's older I know I really won't have as much control as he'll likely be playing off on his own.).

You could try asking him when he does the lawn treatments. Then just make sure you don't have your kids go on the grass until it's fully watered in. Does he have a sprinkler system? If not, then you'll have to wait for the rain. Maybe mentioning that your concerned about the lawn chemicals affecting your children would make him stop. Does he know your concerns? Many people might not even think twice about it, but would stop (or at least reduce) the amount of chemicals they apply to the lawn. If he's not willing to change treatments, I'm sure he'll have no problem letting you know when he applies them so you can be sure to stay off until it's watered in.

Good luck!

[Cynthia Mosher]

msan I'm sorry you feel the responses were judgemental. These posts are some of a few of the wide and varying opinions you will get on a discussion forum. While it's totally reasonable to think Mothering members would sympathetic to what you are asking, sometimes the replies turn out a bit different and left or right of your expectations.

Your post said:

---

Does anyone have a link to a good article about the dangers of lawn fertilizers and weed killers, etc?  My father in law is putting herbicides and fertilizer on the lawn....where his 4 grandchildren  (ages 5, 2, 20 months, and 12 months - my son) play on the lawn. As in, fertilizer scattered in the grass all around the playhouse.   Keeping my son off the lawn is difficult, because he's always at the grandparents' house and of course wants to play outside in the playhouse with the other kids, but even if I did keep him totally off the lawn the other three kids would still be playing on it all the time. 

"Grampy" is a good guy who loves his grand kids, but he's old school and I don't think he realizes how bad this stuff really is.  I've been trying to find a good, short, accurate, convincing article online that I could give him to inform him nicely, and also maybe some safe alternatives to make his lawn nice. The man has a huge, 5 acre lawn that he spends most of his time trying to make look like a golf course.  I admit I don't really know the specific reasons these chemicals are bad, I just know enough to steer away from them. I need some good information that will inform and convince a type A, analytical mind.

 Thank you!!! 

---

I think your post was fine and your question and idea reasonable. Trying to explain the dangers of the lawn chemicals to Grampy - offering him some information that will help you share your concern for your child and his grandson's safety is a good thing, and not an unreasonable idea. if you don't get the info and help you're looking for here I suggest you try posting to The Mindful Home or better yet - Diggin' in the Earth. You'll probably get some helpful replies there. 

[kathymuggle]

Here are 2  - hope they are helpful

http://watoxics.org/healthy-living/healthy-families/healthy-schools/pesticides-101/pesticides101/

http://www.leahcollective.org/news-room/123-cancer-society-seeks-pesticide-ban

fwiw, I would not let my child (particularly a crawler) regularly play on treated grass.  He has the right to use pesticides I  guess (although numerous cities have banned them for cosmetic use), but you have the right to let your kids play where you want.

I would initiate a conversation (nicely) about kids and treated lawn.  I would offer support and help in lawn changing (he might enjoy working with you on it!) If he does not want to change his ways, you may need to move to playing more at your property.  

Edited by kathymuggle - 7/3/11 at 6:57am

[LynnS6]

You might also suggest some non-toxic alternatives to him. A lot people don't really think much about what they put on their lawn, but they want it to look nice. If there's a non-toxic alternative, he might be willing to use it for the sake of his grandchild.

http://www.gardensalive.com/product.asp?pn=3115

http://www.gardensalive.com/product.asp?pn=3721