I haven't read all of the other replies yet, but I just wanted to say that I totally understand. I mean, my dream was always to be able to do what I'm doing now, but the reality of living it is a bit more than I imagined. I wouldn't change things necessarily, because I love being able to raise my own kids, and not have to send them off to daycare or whatever.... BUT, the way you talk about your DH could have been written from my own fingers. I think the worst part for me is that he absolutely does not get it. Period. He doesn't understand that I have zero adult interaction. I have NO family here, and have made NO friends... mainly because I have no car, so I rarely get to leave our home. I understand that he is working all day, just like I am... but he's surrounded by coworkers, who chat, and laugh and joke with him. He's got other people to relate to all day long. People praise him when he handles something difficult, etc., etc. No one gives a rat's a** when I make a vomit stain disappear, or when I manage to make a full lunch, while singing nursery rhymes AND nursing a baby.
I'll go back and read the other replies now... but some of what you said really hit home for me. And while I really don't want to rush through my boys being little, I can understand looking forward to that time when things do get easier. That being said... I'm expecting our 4th son in October, so I'm starting fresh, all over again....lol. (That's another reason that I can't vent to anyone in my life... because they all say something like, "Well then why'd you go and get pregnant again?")
About the difference for your working husband, I totally agree. It's a question of having autonomy. Even on the job, you generally determine your own actions moment-to-moment. As a SAHM, every moment feels dictated, you know?
And MrsSurplus, thanks for sharing that picture.