July Chat Thread! - Page 3

[diana_of_the_dunes]

Originally Posted by montessorimama1 

Diana - I'm so happy for you!!  I kept thinking about you last night and I'm relieved everything went well and the babies are doing fine!  As for the catheter, YUCK.  Just plain YUCK.  The medical establishment SUCKS and lawsuits are going to be the downfall of the United States, IMHO.

I'm finally relaxing in Salerno, Italy, by the sea, after a grueling month of final exams.  I graduated, got my diploma, reunited with DH, made it to the 2nd trimester, had an exhausting three days sightseeing in Siena and now have decided to do NOTHING for three days.  Yesterday I hung out on the hotel deck, read Oprah on my iPad, ate, and watched natural birth videos.  It was perfect.

Since DH had not been around for the first trimester, it took him a while to wrap his head around the idea that his "partner in crime" was now pregnant and had different needs.  He kept me out really late (1am) two days in a row, and even though I told him repeatedly that I was tired and wanted to go back to the hotel, he brushed it off.  We were also eating nothing but pasta, bread, and sugar, which where high on my list of 1st trimester nausea inducers, so needless to say my body was not happy.  On the second night while having dinner with friends, after almost falling asleep in my pasta and having a woman holding a cigarrette less than 10 inches from my face, I got up and told him I was so tired, I was going to throw up, and I was going back to the hotel.  I dashed off and started crying in the middle of the street, having a full-blown hormonal attack.

So now DH is careful to feed me every 2 hours and lets me lounge around doing nothing.  Sometimes hormones have their advantages...

13 weeks today and home in less than a week!!!  I can't wait!!!

I have noticed that I seem to have more "issues" with older medical personnel than the younger generation.  I have hope that things are changing, but it will be slowly.  And, of course, there are always the folks who insist that there is an absolute right way to do things, and that's that.  Maybe we will have some kind of tort reform soon, and then doctors can stop being so afraid of litigation that they order totally unnecessary procedures just to cover themselves.  A model of patient care that involves the patient more would be great.

I feel bad for both you and your husband, Pilar!  The poor guy hasn't seen you in ages, and you've morphed into a completely different being...  I'm sorry it took a meltdown on your part to get him to see how serious you are, and how your needs have changed.  Looking back at my first pregnancy, if I'd have taken it a bit easier and asked DH for more help, I probably would have been less stressed and tired.  Good for you for knowing your limits.

[contactmaya]

Great news Diana!

Look forward to catching up with posts later....

[HardCoreMom]

my kids and husband have been really sick all week.  we've been stuck inside, watching the beautiful weather out there.  it's kind of like our typical january, only our cabin fever is exacerbated by thoughts of everything we want to be doing outside.  i am excited to be having another january baby, because it worked out so well with my last Jan babe- no one wanted to spend a lot of time out in the cold snow, and i got to huddle indoors with my family.  for me, it's the perfect time to hunker down (and nurse around the clock).  july, not so much.  i hope the kids get better soon so that we can get back out in the fun.

me, i think i'm having to come to terms with the fact that i've popped.  i keep telling myself that i need to get exercising, and then i'll feel more like myself.  but, yeah.  i've popped.

still want to exercise.  eager to be feeling better.

grateful, though, that things seems fine, pregnancy-wise.  i'm thankful for today, and happy to be here.

[Conchobhar]

Had first MW appointment today!  Heard the heartbeat (150) and made it through their "screening" for the Birth Center.  Soooooooo relieved.

Edited by Conchobhar - 7/8/11 at 10:25am

[writinglove]

Hi all,

I'm back from France! We had a great time, but the place just isn't the same without soft cheese, wine, and coffee.

I'm happy to report that I took taking it easy very seriously. The only time I got really sick was when we misjudged the distance we had to walk while we were in Paris. There is nothing like hot sun, a serious schlepp, and the street smells of Paris to bring on a full-blown nausea attack. Pilar, I almost did the same thing you did in Italy: I got up dramatically from the table where we were eating, announced that I may just have to go back to the hotel before the meal even arrived. Fortunately a quick walk around the block make things better, and I was able to endure the rest of the dinner. My husband was certain to eat fast and skipped the coffee at the end.

I'm off to my nuchal screen this afternoon. Looking forward to learning more, and a little nervous about false positives.

Talk to you all soon.

[HardCoreMom]

Originally Posted by Conchobhar 

Had first MW appointment today!  Heard the heartbeat (150) and made it through their "screening" for the Birth Center.  Soooooooo relieved.

fantastic news about the birth center!  (and the heartbeat!)  congrats!
 

[diana_of_the_dunes]

I'm so jealous of all the mamas on vacations in exotic places!  I'm so pathetic right now that I'm sure I wouldn't actually enjoy taking a trip anywhere, except maybe a chair under a tree near the beach, but it sounds so nice!

I had my regularly scheduled OB appointment this morning, where I was ordered to take it easy.  After going home and thinking about it a while, I called back and asked my midwife for a note to work half-days for a while.  I also talked to her a bit about the whole ER ordeal and my flu over the weekend.  She agreed that I need to rest and let my body heal, and she faxed over a note.  My supervisor was really good about the whole thing, and they even agreed to dock my pay instead of making me use half a sick day every day (I want the sick time in case I need it later).  I'm hoping I can go back to full-time after a week or so, but I'm so grateful to be able to rest...  I'm so exhausted, and I hope that working less will help me take a little more time to take care of myself.  I remember being tired when I was pregnant with DS, but this is a whole different beast.  In addition, I'm an emotional train wreck this week, and I just can't seem to find any kind of normalcy.

I should SO get the award for being the most whiny, pathetic pregnant mama ever...!    Is anyone else this out-of-sorts??

[squidink]

Originally Posted by Conchobhar 

Had first MW appointment today!  Heard the heartbeat (150) and made it through their "screening" for the Birth Center.  Soooooooo relieved.

Yay!

Originally Posted by diana_of_the_dunes 

I should SO get the award for being the most whiny, pathetic pregnant mama ever...!    Is anyone else this out-of-sorts??

I am very whiny too, and right with you on the 'emotional train wreck' thing.  I have stupid crying jags over cat food commercials or because none of my cute jeans fit anymore.  On the way home from shopping for maternity pants for 3 hours this afternoon and coming home empty handed, I threw a little hissy fit in the car.  My husband was pretty understanding about it but kept offering solutions when I only wanted empathy.  I think I need to get him to read NVC.  In any event, I spent much of this afternoon feeling like an ill-proportioned giantess with no clothes that fit and hips that won't quit aching.  Boohoo.  

Nah, I'm exaggerating about that last part.  I'm going to get over it, eat something healthy for dinner, do some yoga and order some maternity pants online.  Then if they don't fit, I can just send them back and I won't feel like I wasted hours driving around and trying on crappy clothes.  

I hope your half-days have you rested and feeling back to normal quick!
 

[kismetbaby]

writinglove--can't wait to hear about how your NT went. I have mine on Monday morning. I'm a bit anxious.

Diana-- *hugs* Hope you get some rest and feel better. I have my moments. . .I'm definitely more out of sorts and emotional than I was before.  And I hate feeling that way.

squidink--seriously, shopping for maternity is stressful. But hey, it's a passing moment and you can burn all those clothes in another 9 months if you want!  I like Old Navy. . .not too expensive and pretty decent.  But finding a store that stocks a good selection is hard, so online is a good way to go.

I think my m/s is starting to get better! finally. woohoo. I am so ready to feel a little more normal.

[cedarwoman]

Hi everyone :)

Feeling a bit more energetic at 13.5 weeks... and the frequency/urgency of peeing lessens daily as the 'popping' increases...

I'm nervous about telling work (I work on contract and I don't really feel like I know what my 'rights' are - essentially I bill the company I work for, so I'm more like an independent contractor)... nervous about money too, really. I don't know if my work qualifies me for mat leave, but I *can* work from home so ... well, most days I kind of try not to think about it!

I have told all of my close friends and family now. Hubby is being sweet and loving, and I feel fantastic other than still being a bit tired by 10pm (We get up around 7:30am so I guess this is not totally insane)

Doing lots of research on baby-wearing & co-sleeping, trying to figure out which options will be best for us and excited to take advantage of extra energy to start really nesting :)

[montessorimama1]

Diana - I'm so glad that work is being flexible; you are doing twice the work we are, what with carrying two babies.  I can't IMAGINE what that must be like, plus working full-time in a demanding job!  You're my hero and you're not at all whiny! :)  Isn't that what these boards are for, anyways?  Oh, and if it's any consolation regarding being in an exotic place, like writinglove says, you can't drink wine or coffee, you have to walk for hours and hours in the hot sun surrounded by smelly people who don't understand the concept of a daily shower, restaurants are always closed just when the baby decides he's hungry, and you have to hunt down and use disgusting public bathrooms every time you want to pee (which for me is about every 45 minutes)... In a nutshell, I've spent the past four days holed up in the hotel (while DH goes to work), where at least I have a/c, a bathroom, fruit, and a bed. 

writinglove - So glad you had a good time in France, I was wondering how you fared!  How funny that you also almost "lost it", but I admire that you regained your composure.  I wasn't that lucky.  Good luck on the nuchal, hope everything's fine!

squidink - Nothing worse than spending three hours trying on ill-fitting clothes and coming out empty-handed. :(  Online sounds like the way to go!!!  Let us know what you find!

kismetbaby - Hurray for less m/s!!  Isn't that the most wonderful feeling ever??

cedarwoman - I hope your work can be understanding, especially since you can work from home.  I mean, you're pregnant but still perfectly capable of being a functioning individual, right?  It baffles me why companies would want to fire an independent contractor just because she's pregnant... Good luck!

AFM, DH finally dragged me out of the hotel last night pretty much against my will, and I'm glad he did, too.  We had a lovely and romantic dinner in a little restaurant in the old part of Salerno, and I told him to savor every minute of it because it will be a long time  before we had time to ourselves after the baby is born.  He seemed a little queasy about the idea, truth be told.  I'm not sure DH is handling the idea of fatherhood very well.  He was super eager before we got pregnant, he was the one who wanted children more firmly than I did... But now every time I mention a symptom (I try not to complain very often) he gets a serious look and changes the subject.  It's like he doesn't want to be reminded that there's a baby growing inside me.  Sometimes he makes cute comments about the baby, but when it comes to my changing body, I think he's having a hard time with it all.  His mom says it's because he knows so much about so many things (DH is a very bright scientist), but when it comes to fatherhood he knows nothing and that makes him insecure.  Any thoughts on how I can support him in his new role?  I asked him to share his concerns with me the last time that he admitted to me that he was frightened at the thought of being a dad, but then he clammed up and didn't say anything else.   ARGHHH, men... It's bad enough having one hormonal person around, but two???

[kelseywhitney]

Hey ladies, my husband and I got in a car accident tonight, so say a little prayer for the baby and me. I'm experiencing cramping but not bleeding...so hopefully everything is okay, the paramedics said everything seemed okay but they could only do so much, and to go to the hospital if there is any more pain experience or bleeding. 

Here is a picture of the car and my husband...hah his sense of humor is what kept me going threw the night with out too much stress.

[AfricanQueen99]

Oh, Kelsey! Rest up, drink water, and think good thoughts...and do NOT hesitate to see your doctor if you feel you need to.

[writinglove]

Hi all,

The first part of the NT went well. Everything is in normal range and I got to see the heartbeat, which was beating at 170. I can't believe I'm actually making a person! It really didn't seem real until yesterday.

Kelsey, rest up and listen to your body. I'm so grateful you and your husband are ok.

Montessori, I can imagine this whole is experience is pretty crazy for your husband. Particularly because he hasn't been with you since the beginning. I know my local birthing center offers a class called Conscious Fatherhood, and I imagine there is something like that in SD too. Maybe he would benefit from more information? I hope the rest of the trip goes well.

Diana, so glad to hear the babies are ok. So sorry about the catheter. It seems like they could have started the ultrasound to see if your fluid intake was sufficient before they intervened. Bizarre.

AFM, I'm a little more nauseous after eating than usual. I'm blaming the jet lag. And I think I'm starting to bond with the fetus. Hooray!

And to everyone I didn't mention, stay strong. Thinking of you.

[kismetbaby]

Kelsey--so sorry you went through that! Rest and try not to stress out. I'm sure your baby will be just fine. 

writinglove (can't remember your name now sorry)--glad the NT went well. The u/s and those measurements were (will be) the part that was the most important to me anyway. So I'm sure all is great with your babe. And know with my first it certainly wasn't real until that moment at that u/s. Ahh, so amazing to see them kicking around in there!

Pilar--I can't help but address the DH becoming a dad issue a bit, but of course I don't know *your* DH.  I think it's hard for hubbies, especially with the first pg. It's so not real to them yet in the way it is for us. And I also think they (at least for me) we pg ladies tend to want to figure it all out *now* and talk about it all *now* and that can be overwhelming for the men-folk. Remember, it's all a process. You both have 9 months to wrap your heads around having a baby and then you'll have a whole new process once you actually have that baby in your arms. Some men freak out until the hold that little person and then they are fine, some men are totally scared of babies,but great wit toddlers, and some guys just need to ease into it every step of the way. And hey, I'm sure there are some that just just in the deep end immediately!  :)  But I truly believe that just letting it unfold is the way to go. . when the moments seem right talk about it, but don't force those talks either.  And don't overwhelm them with things they can't do anything about but might stress them. Most men seem to deal better with stuff they can "fix". . .so ask for concrete things that will help you. Or suggest things that will be helpful in the future. Everybody's scared of becoming a parent right? No matter how much we wanted it. But he may need time to stew on that before he talks about it. . .sigh, that's just they way men are. And I think your mom is dead on. . .my DH is also a scientist and I think that makes it especially hard for those guys to deal with stuff they can't fix or they can't wrap their heads around, or things that they understand to be potentially scary/dangerous.

As for the pg-wife-body issues. . .men all seem to react very differently to that. I have a friend whose DH won't dtd with her once she starts showing, while on the other hand, my DH still talks about how sexy and round I was last pg.  :) Again, it doesn't happen overnight, it's a process and most people find themselves adjusting as they go along.  I hope that he gets more and more excited. . .I know my DH finally felt involved when he could feel ds kick. . .but then again, some men don't rise to the occasion till there is a newborn in there arms. So try and trust that he will become the wonderful dad that you always knew he would be, he'll just do it in his own time and in his own way.

Okay. . .enough lecture? :)   And hey, DH and I still argue about some of this stuff--it really is a process!  DH has been begging me to get a babysitter and go on (alone) dates with him again since ds was 6m. . .but I still haven't felt okay with that (we have no family close by) and ds is now 21m.  I know it's time by now and I know that DH would truly appreciate it, but my mama-bear instinct has just been too on-high for me to leave ds with basically a stranger. But I know if I had told DH while I was pg that we wouldn't have a date for 2 years after our baby was born he would have left me right then and there! (Okay, not really, but he would have freaked out.)  So somethings you just can't "decide" until you are there.  And he has accepted it, b/c, well, I'm the mama!

Okay, okay, really done now with the lecture portion!  I can get wordy.  Big news here is that ds may have sttn for the first time!!!! woohoo! (and yes he is almost 2years old) I say "may" b/c ds is fully capable of finding the boob all on his own (he sleeps with us). So it's possible that he did wake and nurse and I never knew it. But since I never knew it, then as far as I'm concerned he did sttn!  Unfortunately, last night was the one night DH and I stayed up late to watch a movie. So now I'm kicking myself that for the first time in 2 years I could have slept for 8 hours straight and didn't get too!  ARGH!  Then again, my bladder would have woken me.  But I did get 6 hours uninterrupted and that's pretty good (Oh how our standards fall once we are parents!).  DH is out with ds (yeah!) so I'm gonna clean house. I'd rather lay in bed with a book, but I know if I don't clean house now, I'll never have the motivation and besides it goes way faster without a toddler underfoot!  Off to clean. . .

[danamichele]

Wow, so much going on with you all!  Kelsey, I'm so glad you're doing okay, and Diana, your babies too!  It's good to read all the exciting updates.

I was feeling so upbeat last time I posted, but now my food aversions and uneasy stomach seem to have returned a bit (I'm 15 weeks tomorrow) and I've been lightheaded with a headache much of today.  I'm so glad it's the weekend and my husband can pick up some slack and let me rest-- which I have done like a pro, taking extra long naps and sleeping in!  I've also felt less baby movement lately, which has had me worried after feeling consistent movement for a week or two.  But I felt some fluttering again today, so I'm trying to chill out about that.  Maybe the baby just changed positions or something.  I know it's still early.

MontisorriMama-- When I was pregnant with my daughter we went to Italy too, and subsequently named her Siena.  :)  Yeah, it's not the same traveling when you can't enjoy the things a country is famous for, like the wines, cheeses, and prosciutto, but I loved Italy anyway.

I'm trying to convince my husband that the three of us should go on a trip before our family expands again.  He was all for it a month or so ago, and then we had a bit of a "spat" a couple weeks ago because I suggested it again.  (Sometimes HE seems like the crazy hormonal one! Sheesh.)  But I think he's coming around again.  If he won't go for Europe, I've been looking into Costa Rica, where I've wanted to go for ages also.  So we'll see.  He can get time off in October, and I'll be farther along in pregnancy then than when we traveled last time-- entering the third trimester...

[chilichiki]

Kelsey- if it makes you feel any better... when my mother was  4 months pregnant with me (30?! years ago) she was in a car accident where a drunk driver flew through a stop sign and creamed the van she was riding in, hitting the vehicle exactly where she was!  Despite some cramping, everything was fine and the rest of her pregnancy continued almost uneventfully.  Hope everything is alright with you and baby!

Diana- glad you received good news, but inserting the catheter seems totally ridiculous!

And I am so glad I am not the only whiny pregnant woman!!  Lately I have been so out of sorts and everything is getting to me.  I don't feel good. I throw up all the time.  Nothing tastes good.  I'm tired.  I cry at literally EVERYTHING!! 

Hoping things change when I finally hit that second trimester mark in a week and a half!!

[shockels]

So good to read all these updates! I'm sorry I've been so MIA but the nausea has been fierce. I work 12 hour days and then I have no energy to do anything but eat carbs and crumple into my bed. We had a really nice BBQ at our house yesterday that I actually enjoyed. If I have one good day I pay for it double the day after. Yuck. I also puked twice at work on Friday which was a first for me. Yuck again. But I still have hope that this won't last too much longer.

I had my NT scan on Wednesday and so far everything looks great. You'd think that seeing images of this little baby would make me feel closer to it, but it's still hard for it to be real while I feel so pukey. I almost feel bad that I'm not more bonded. The pregnancy itself is very real, but the baby is still so far away. Hard to explain. I work tomorrow but am off the rest of the week. Yeah!

[diana_of_the_dunes]

Wow, Kelsey...  Hope you are feeling better and the cramping has stopped.  Rest up and take care!

Sandra - Glad everything went well with the NT scan.  I've never really bonded a whole lot with babies in utero.  I'm ultra-protective of them, but it's not anything like when I felt for DS once he was out and I started to really get to know him.  It'll come in time.

Kismet - That's awesome that DS STTN, or that you did at least!  Mine will sleep from about 8p to 6:30a (then has a bottle and goes back to bed for another hour), but since I go to bed around midnight, that still means I only get 6 hours straight of sleep.  The other night, I went to bed at 10:30, so I actually slept 8 hour straight!  That was the first time in over 22 months, since I know I was getting up to pee a lot at night during my 3rd trimester.  Too bad we won't get to enjoy the sleeping longer, since we have new babies on the way and have to start all over...

AFM, whatever funky discharge I was having seems to have pretty much gone away.  I'm still getting frequent pains low in my uterus, but I think they're from stretching or round ligament pain, not actual uterine pain.  I have an appointment with a maternal fetal medicine specialist on July 22.  I'll be getting another ultrasound so that they can check the structure of the placenta(s), amniotic sacs, and take other measurements.  I know 16 weeks is early, but because it's a specialized ultrasound, I'm wondering if maybe they'll be able to tell the genders...  I'd love to be able to call the babies by names, instead of just Baby A and Baby B.  

[montessorimama1]

 kelsey -  Get a lot of rest, make sure you are as relaxed as possible, and keep us posted on your progress!  I'm so happy all three of you are ok!

writinglove - Hurray for the good NT and huge hb!!  I'm so happy for you!!  Now it's time to enjoy the reality of the baby!

kismetbaby - Thank you so much for your insightful words, it's so helpful to know that I'm not the only one who's ever had to go through this (of course I'm not, duh, but sometimes it just feels like it).  DH has been so much better the last couple of days, he seems to be coming around to the idea of the baby since we've been discussing nursery projects he can get involved in and stuff that we need to do to the house to get it ready for the baby, and I've been telling him how much I appreciate his support and patience.  I will keep your words in mind and not push the subject when he seems hesitant.  Thanks again!!

danamichele - Ugh, I can't imagine still having m/s at almost 15 weeks!!  You poor woman!  Maybe a change of scenery will do you good... Costa Rica sounds lovely! 

chilichiki - So sorry you're still feeling badly... You're almost in the second trimester, when hormone levels stabilize and we feel all full of energy again (I wouldn't know, I just fell asleep at my desk, haha).  Sending hopeful thoughts your way...

shockels - Congrats on the NT!  Enjoy the rest of the week off!

So DH surprised me with a day in the Amalfi Coast followed by an evening at a classical music concert overlooking the sea in Ravello.  We heard/saw a very talented violin soloist playing a Stradivarius that dates back to the year 1730!!!  It was beyond gorgeous, and of course I was hormonal and cried half the time because it was so overwhelming to be there... But I must admit that my two favorite moments of the day were: 1) when we walked into a store and one woman commented to another in Italian: "Look, she's expecting a baby", and 2) When DH and I were standing in a piazza after the concert talking to friends and a man walked by pushing a stroller, shook DH's hand and said: "Congratulations", with obvious reference to my belly.  Soooo random and unexpected, and soooo totally cool! 

We fly home tomorrow morning, and I think I found an amazing midwife who's also an acupuncturist (my mom's an acu so that's very important to me).  I can't wait to meet with her!!  Final hugs from Italy, *see* you across the pond!