I separated when my baby boy was 8 months old, well, my then husband left.
He was absent from our lives for almost a year and when I was preparing papers to file he came back to get joint custody
Currently my now 3 year 5 months old boy has two homes where he spent equal time. 50/50.
He is just three, but my cousin who is a single mom started getting quiestions when her daugther was just 4 about her dad and the fact that he is not in her life.
What do you tell them?
I am guessing for now to tell him there are different types of families (etc etc) and ask him what he thinks about that.
Perhaps ill have to explain that mommy and daddy dont want to be a couple and this is why he has two homes...?
My marriage ended after a lot of abuse, disrespect, neglect and multiple affairs from my now ex.
I filed for divorce because he just wanted things to stay that way.
My parents almost divorced when I was 12 for, unfortunatelly, similar reasons, they worked things out and now they couldnt be happier.
I was never allowed to ask any questions and was told nothing. I feel that if I knew some of that mess, I could have avoid many of the same pitfalls on my own marriage, i wouldnt have been missing so many warning signs, or even I might have been able , just like my parents, to save the family.
I say the above, because I know many think it is better to never tell them what really happened. I think this is part of my son's story, a part I dont want him to go though, so, as age appropiate, maybe as a young adult, I might need to share some of the story, in kindness and love, but hiding everything, to me is not healthy.
Please be compassionate on your responses, we all have a personal path, I want and need to hear your insights.
Thank you so much for reading