I have 2 DDs (3 years and 10 months) and am a SAHM. We moved about 7 months ago and my support network vanished. We moved to be closer to my parents and my MIL, so, we do have that support, but I still have NO friends here. I am very social and it is really killing me. It has been getting worse and worse as time goes on, so it may just be depressed. DH has a new job and is not super happy where he is and is trying to start a business at night, so I have very little support from him putting the kids to bed. The house is a mess and I can't find the energy or time to clean it up and if I do, DD2 cries the entire time unless I am wearing her or holding her. DD1 is really pushing her independence and I just don't like her sometimes and it makes me sad.
I feel like I am the worst mother because I don't want to do anything with the girls. I get so snippy with them and am cranky most of the time. DH is a good participant in parenting from 4:30-8 and helps with dinner etc. He does complain quite a bit about us not having enough 'alone time' together, and I agree, but I just don't feel like it most of the time.
I find myself wanting to spank the girls because I am frustrated and really need some alone time, but then when I get it, I feel lonely.
I don't feel like this is severe, or that I need meds, but I want to get out of this and my kids really deserve a much better me.
I do exercise regularly and am pretty sure I need more sleep, but DD2 is still nursing quite a bit at night.
Thanks for any advice.