XH in another school district, can I sign DS up for that school district?

[4C-mom]

Ex moved to a neighboring city last month. our oldest is going into middle school this year. Although I live in an okay neighborhood, the middle school in ex's neighborhood is better than the middle school in mine. We were never married, and don't have a custody agreement through the court. we've got nothing through the courts. My children all live with me, and he sees them frequently. I definitely am the primary though.

Can i legally sign him up for the other school system? I feel like that b/c he lives with me, he should be in "my" school, but since we dont have a custody agreement, and his dad does live in and pay taxes in the other city, and he's on the birth certificate, that my son should have the benefit of the other school b/c his dad lives there.

What do you think? WOuld you do it?

[kristandthekids]

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Edited by kristandthekids - 1/16/13 at 4:21pm

[zebra15]

We have 'open enrollment' around here and as long as the school has room your kid can go to any public school in the state. You just need to fill out the 'open enrollment' form.

Now if you do enroll under dads info you realize dad will be on the mailing list and get all the mail etc.  So if report cards are mailed home, well they go to dads.

You will have to provide transportation probably.

How reliable is dad's housing, is he the type of move all the time?

[meemee]

Originally Posted by 4C-mom 

Can i legally sign him up for the other school system?

depends on your school district. what their rules are.

like pp we did open enrollment too. are u thinking about fall this year? if you are it may be too late because our open enrollment happens in feb of that year. 

how is YOUR relationship with ur ex? do you feel safe he wont try to be the primary parent if you use his address? using his address would be the easiest way to go. however please note that if its his address then HE would get all the notifications. would he be responsible enough to keep you updated. our school refused to send separate notifications to two parents. they would only allow one. 

talk to your school district. we also have a way around it. there is always a backdoor and a different protocol. 

i would make this decision based on two things.

1. quality of school (the better school always gets my vote)

2. Transportation and other. who will ur son live with? how will you manage the logistics?

i will face this exact situation in 3 years time. ex has the better school than my area. i will first try open enrollment and then decide on using his address. 

[4C-mom]

no open enrollment here. transportation is not an issue, because I would want to drive him anyways. I drive all my kids to school. him getting all the papers in teh mail? really, hte school usually sends stuff home with the kid. but i do wonder if he would forget stuff. i wonder if i could use his dad's address and my phone number? would they want to call him first for any issues? hmmm. I just dont know what the letter of the law says. I will call them tomorrow and ask....or maybe I shouldn't, b/c if I know, then I have to abide.  

hmmmmmm

[meemee]

Originally Posted by 4C-mom 
 him getting all the papers in teh mail? really, hte school usually sends stuff home with the kid.

how do you get your testing results? are they sent home with him, or through the mail. we never get results in person. always through the mail. if there is any other 'issue' and the parent needs to be notified (like truancy or ANYTHING) they will send a letter by mail. so what i am saying is what they send by mail probably wont be sent with the student.

i wonder if i could use his dad's address and my phone number? would they want to call him first for any issues? hmmm. I just dont know what the letter of the law says.

i dont see why u couldnt do that esp. if you are using a cell phone number. HOWEVER the phone number is kinda unimportant. because u can give the school both u guys numbers and the school will call both you guys with all teh announcements (i think that happens coz of the automatic phonecall system we have here). we have received letters in teh mail, but never important phone calls from school. however if it is a pick up issue ur school has both ur numbers. 
 

what u can do since this is a district even city issue is find out how you can transfer a child from one district to another. here we CAN do that (its not common knowledge) and if you have the time you can do the steps and letters. the good news is this is middle school. in elem. schools in our area they take into consideration the distance of home to school. 

[sunflowers]

Honestly?  I would call the district your ex lives in and ask them what requirements they have for enrollment.  Run the situation past them and see what they say.

[lilyka]

Our schools are open enroll throughout the state so it is a non issue.  But I know a lot of people cross the MN/SD or IA/SD border for better school options using a grandparents or non custodial parents address or friend....