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I think we need new forum guidelines - Page 2  

post #21 of 61

We are going to return to not debating homeschooling vs. learning at school unless Peggy wishes differently. The other thread has been closed for now.

post #22 of 61

I object strongly to any suggestion of restricting who can and can not reply----it's discrimination. Who plays judge here?

 

The use of derogatory terms and accusation of "trolling" are offensive and inflammatory - IMO and have no place here or any other thread

 

When the OP (of for that matter any one else) states that they have benefited it should not be viewed as negative no matter what one's objection is---isn't that the WHOLE point---to help those that have requested it?

 

thread guidelines are one thing-move it if it needs to be but don't restrict freedoms 

post #23 of 61

I think that the OP opened up some wonderful discussions. I think hearing from former homeschoolers about some of the cons they encountered can be very helpful to future homeschoolers or people on the fence trying to decide. There are cons to homeschooling and personally I can't take much stock in anyone who can't see that. None of the early posts bashed homeschooling at all! It was not a debate or done "in theory" It was peoples  personal experiences on homeschooling and the negatives they experienced. I don't believe there is anything wrong with hosting a discussion like that.  In fact to not allow a discussion like that to take place is just.....well......rediculous....... . 2cents.gif

post #24 of 61

The learning at school forum is equivalent to the learning at home board, not the unschooling board. They are both general purpose boards meant for a variety of people in various circumstances. The USing board is equivalent to your waldorf and montesorri boards. The reason they are support only is because they serve a special niche group. Which doesn't apply to learning at school.


Edited by Arduinna - 7/13/11 at 7:43am
post #25 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by Arduinna View Post

The learning at school forum is equivalent to the learning at home board, not the homeschooling board. They are both general purpose boards meant for a variety of people in various circumstances. The HSing board is equivalent to your waldorf and montesorri boards. The reason they are support only is because they serve a special niche group. Which doesn't apply to learning at school.

 

I haven't been in the Learning at Home forum much. Is it common for people to participate in threads there by posting a massive list of anti-homeschool research and sites? Because that would be equivalent to posting a massive list of anti-school research.

 

I really don't understand why it was difficult for people to understand that they were in the Learning at School forum where people were discussing the positives of B&M education. I don't know that I thought the thread needed to be closed, but a reminder to be respectful of the location of the thread would have gone a long way IMO.
 

 

post #26 of 61

...also, in the Montessori forum there are frequently very disrespectful posts which would likely not be allowed in the unschooling forum - take the "montessori kids selfish" thread. It's just the bias of MDC, I think, but it does get tiring.

post #27 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by Arduinna View Post

The learning at school forum is equivalent to the learning at home board, not the homeschooling board. They are both general purpose boards meant for a variety of people in various circumstances. The HSing board is equivalent to your waldorf and montesorri boards. The reason they are support only is because they serve a special niche group. Which doesn't apply to learning at school.


When you say the "homeschooling board," do you mean the unschooling board?

post #28 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by Daffodil View Post




When you say the "homeschooling board," do you mean the unschooling board?


yes, I will edit that so it's more clear, thanks.

 

post #29 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by ramama View Post OP wanted balanced information, to know what happened that made homeschoolers decide to public school, so that she could avoid the pitfalls and prepare for them.  Getting information from former homeschoolers who now hang out in the Learning at School board is a good idea, and I hope the OP got some valuable information that will help her successfully homeschool.

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by SaveTheWild View Post

I did get a lot of useful information, and probably a lot of others did too.  Certainly the personal animosity between a few posters detracted from the thread, but a lot of interesting perspectives were expressed as well.

 

Whether it was a bad idea for me to ask the question here ... well, 11 pages of response here, versus the 3 that were for the same thread posted in the homeschooling forum suggests that there was a lot of interesting info to be gained from folks in the schooling forum.

 

ETA: Also, the whole point of my question was that I was finding that everything I read about homeschooling was coming from current homeschoolers or from an obviously pro-homeschool bias.  I was seeking information from outside that "camp" so that I could get some perspective.  Maybe having homeschoolers defend homeschooling on this thread ended up turning it into more of a personal debate that it ideally could have been.  I suppose it would have been less of a debate if folks had, instead, kept it to helping provide neutral studies or research and experience that showed that homeschooling wasn't perfect.

 

Part of me thinks that if people really don't want to read about homeschooling and don't want to be "told" that their schooling choice is bad, then one easy suggestion is to not read the thread (or any thread with homeschooling in the title).  There are a lot of threads on mothering that I don't read, an nobody is required to read any thread they don't want to.  Some of this reads as if every thread, and indeed every post, must be carefully tailored so that each and every member of the forum would find it relevant and non-offensive.  Seems like an impossible task.  

 

 

I agree with the pp that the thread title may have started the negative tone. If you wanted to know why people decided on learning at school instead of homeschooling, why they stopped homeschooling, or experiences in moving from homeschooling to school, I would have titled it that way--I have seen threads like that before (that don't end up locked) and this forum seems like and obvious place to ask those questions.

post #30 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by GuildJenn View Post


I really don't understand why it was difficult for people to understand that they were in the Learning at School forum where people were discussing the positives of B&M education. I don't know that I thought the thread needed to be closed, but a reminder to be respectful of the location of the thread would have gone a long way IMO.
 

 



yeahthat.gif

post #31 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by GuildJenn View Post



 

I haven't been in the Learning at Home forum much. Is it common for people to participate in threads there by posting a massive list of anti-homeschool research and sites? Because that would be equivalent to posting a massive list of anti-school research.

 

I really don't understand why it was difficult for people to understand that they were in the Learning at School forum where people were discussing the positives of B&M education. I don't know that I thought the thread needed to be closed, but a reminder to be respectful of the location of the thread would have gone a long way IMO.
 

 



The thread was specifically anti-homeschooling. It wasn't framed in any way as a "positive BM education thread"  or even "here's why we choose school" nor were the bulk of the anti-homeschool comments framed that way.  Homeschoolers weren't crashing a thread about the benefits of school. They were discussing the merits of their own educational choice.

In the homeschooling forum any threads that have even a whiff of an anti-school element to them are shut down or moved within 2 or 3 posts, even if they are intended to be a discussion about why people choose one forum of education over another.

 

 

post #32 of 61

Doesn't culpability fall on the mods? they didn't move the thread-they allowed it to be where it was places

 

Are there guideline as to what can and can't be placed in the title? again, if this was an issue how the OP worded the title- why was it not changed by the mods?

 

 

just asking

post #33 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by serenbat View Post

Doesn't culpability fall on the mods? they didn't move the thread-they allowed it to be where it was places

 

 


No. 

 

Every member is responsible for what they post. Every person is capable of expressing themselves in a respectful and thoughtful manner. And if they can't, they don't have to write anything at all. And if they can't stop themselves from posting, then they bear the responsibility for what they write and how it reflects on them. I think a reminder from the mods, as suggested by GuildJenn, would have been helpful, but it really shouldn't be necessary. 

 

I don't know how much it's worthwhile to chew over that thread, but I've re-read it. Even when someone discussed the problems with homeschooling, they were careful to state that it can work well for some families or some other qualifier to support the choice to homeschool. That is hardly anti-homeschooling. Some posters were brave enough to share honest, very personal stories so that their experience might help others, and were met with hostility and negativity. It's very disturbing.  

 


Edited by ollyoxenfree - 7/13/11 at 9:01am
post #34 of 61

 

 

Quote:

No. 

 

Every member is responsible for what they post. Every person is capable of expressing themselves in a respectful and thoughtful manner. And if they can't, they don't have to write anything at all. And if they can't stop themselves from posting, then they bear the responsibility for what they write and how it reflects on them. I think a reminder from the mods, as suggested by GuildJenn, would have been helpful, but it really shouldn't be necessary. 

 

sorry, but this isn't the point I was asserting 

 

IF the thread (which some are objecting to) is placed in a section that is not appropriate- isn't it the responsibility of the mods to move it?  this is not about what was posted- it is about the location

post #35 of 61

ETA: Oops, I meant to quote GuildJenn's post about the Montessori forum and how sometimes disrespectful threads about Montessori schools and students are posted there.

 

That happens in the unschooling forum too. Sometimes people complain about other unschoolers they know IRL, or unschooling advocates/boards/blogs, etc. People post about problems they're having and worries they have. Sometimes there are snarky comments made (or threads started) by people who have no experience with unschooling. It's not really "support-only" (which would probably be boring), but I think it is moderated enough so it doesn't turn into a debate board, which is helpful. I don't see Learning at School turning into a debate board either. Most homeschoolers are not posting snarky comments along the lines of "This is why we homeschool".  Those who do can either be ignored or told why their response is neither helpful nor appropriate.

 

A thread looking for anti-school stories and research would likely not last long in the homeschooling forum. I've seen school threads be swiftly removed (or occasionally moved to this forum).

 

I actually had no problem with the anti-homeschool research thread. If people want to say why homeschool didn't work for them, go ahead. It's not for everyone. I think what happens is people make general anti-homeschooling statements that homeschoolers feel the need to respond to. The same thing happens on the homeschooling boards when broad anti-school statements are made. I understand people wanting to challenge unfair generalizations.

post #36 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by serenbat View Post

 

 

 

sorry, but this isn't the point I was asserting 

 

IF the thread (which some are objecting to) is placed in a section that is not appropriate- isn't it the responsibility of the mods to move it?  this is not about what was posted- it is about the location


Who objected to having the thread here? I am honestly asking. I suspect it was only homeschoolers who feel a need to defend and control the message about homeschooling. 

 

I saw a lot of posters who thought that it was a good idea for the OP to ask in the Learning At School thread for input. Personally, I think it made a lot of sense for the OP to ask people who were former homeschoolers or those who made a different choice for input. As she stated herself, she was only getting positive stories in LAH and she was seeking a wider perspective.

 

It was appropriate to place the thread in this forum. What wasn't appropriate was for people to criticize harshly members who opened themselves up and made themselves vulnerable by discussing their family's journey with homeschooling.

 

 

 

 

 

post #37 of 61

As the mod I will say, that in the 'olden days' I wouldn't have let the thread move forward. Since we are moving toward more openness of discussion with our UA, and counting on members to behave well without a lot of mod participation, I/we decided to let it continue. The thread helped me/us to re-think it and I believe that we'll return to the tried and true method of redirecting and moving threads that end up debating homeschooling vs. out of home schooling. I agree with pp who said that a different thread title might have resulted in a different outcome. Hopefully, having us mods return to the old way of doing things will help everything to return to normal!!

post #38 of 61

I didn't read the thread in question - from the title it just appeared that it would be all drama and little substance. That said, I am totally opposed to "support only" forums. Really, what's the point? If I come here with an issue seeking advice, it is because something I am doing is not working. How does it help to only accept input from people who've made decisions similar to mine? Aren't I more likely to get a greater variety of ideas if I am hearing from people who have made decisions different from mine?

 

And, yes of course, sometimes there are those unhelpful "Public schools are evil, and that's why I homeschool" posts. They aren't helpful, but really, they are no skin off my nose. When I see a post like that, honestly, I just think that it comes from a place of ignorance about our diverse public school system in this country and I ignore it. Easy-peasy!

post #39 of 61

 

 

Quote:
As the mod I will say, that in the 'olden days' I wouldn't have let the thread move forward. Since we are moving toward more openness of discussion with our UA, and counting on members to behave well without a lot of mod participation, I/we decided to let it continue. The thread helped me/us to re-think it and I believe that we'll return to the tried and true method of redirecting and moving threads that end up debating homeschooling vs. out of home schooling. I agree with pp who said that a different thread title might have resulted in a different outcome. Hopefully, having us mods return to the old way of doing things will help everything to return to normal!!

thank you for the clarification- I was just wondering

post #40 of 61

I read the thread in question and personally a large part of me is sadden that it had to be closed because I thought there were many meaningful posts to be had in the discussion. It made me think about  if I entertain the idea, about the research and getting information about the pros/cons - which I believe is called making an informed decision.

 

On the flip side - there were an equal number of derailments in the discussion and I believe that part of it stems from our new UA and MDC still working out the kinks of handling some of these hotter topics.  I hope that we don't go back to shutting threads down - but get some better practice at actually having civil debates.

 

 

WRT to the OP's question - I would not find it helpful for the LAS forum to be "support-only" and not host debate or a civil challenge of ideas. 

And I do have a child in school currently (summer break! surf.gif ) with another one entering in the next year or 2.    

 

 

 

 

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