Pregnancy after loss - Page 4

[cameragirl]

Originally Posted by chels_c2000 

I am going to join you guys. I feel a out of place everywhere. I lost my first baby at 9 weeks and have since had two healthy babies. With my Son, I had lots of scaries at the beginning and my daughter's pregnancy was pretty uneventful. I guess, I feel that since I have only had one loss and healthy babies afterwards that I don't fit in here. But I am scared and  no one understands except those who have lost a baby. I want to feel fine telling everyone and being excited about this pregnancy. If/When something goes wrong, I don't want to deal with it with everyone just those close to me.  Anyway, thanks in advance for the support.

Any way, I went to the Dr this morning just for a quick check up and they did a pregnancy test. I almost losted it on the way home thinking about how the line on the pregnancy test was not dark enough. Why do I have to be so crazy? I get betas done tomorrow so we will see.

Of course you fit in! Loss is loss, no matter if you had children after. It still hurts the same. Good luck with your betas! Hopefully the results will bring you some peace. Here's to a sticky little bean!

[StacieM]

Milk8Shake: glad you got you see your LO

Chelsea: (((((HUGS)))) to you

I just realized that I still haven't made my first appt yet and I'm almost scared to.  I don't want to get bad news. I feel pg, but there's never any guarantee.  I really didn't feel like telling anyone, but I've been tired, and feeling queasy, and dizzy, and sometimes have stupid insomnia which has never happened before.  I actually think my oldest will figure it out soon. 

Before I tell anyone else, I need to tell my SIL, she always was one of the first I told with my others.  I've been keeping it from her because SHE so badly wants to get pg.  She had a loss at 22weeks in December.  That was her second loss.  Her first was her first pg at 23 weeks.  She does have one very cute baby girl between those losses, but I just know how upset she was when she found out her 18yo sis was pg.  I don't want to upset her.  On the other hand, I know she will find out eventually and I really don't want her hearing from someone else because then she will know I kept it from her, but told others which wouldn't be good either.

Anyway - after reading through this thread I started thinking about my last pg with my son.  It was the ONLY pg I carried to term that I ever had bleeding in.  It was just a little at about 7 weeks.  It never crossed my mind before, but now I'm wondering if it could have been a twin loss.  I'll never know.  All they told me was that they saw a black circle in the u/s that they may need to keep an eye on and after that no one mentioned it.  I was never told why I may have been bleeding.  It was probably just one of those things and not a loss, but reading through this thread got me thinking. 

One of these days I have to actually make my 1st appt and see a provider.

[Brisen]

Milk8shake, thanks for your thoughts.  I don't know how good a twin pregnancy would be for me, physically, or for the twins -- I tend to grow babies who are small already.  But it has definitely been on my mind.  I had a dream last night that I was feeling my tummy, to see if I could feel anything, and I felt two heartbeats.  Then the babies suddenly grew, and I was feeling two little feet on opposite sides, and then suddenly they were born and in my arms.  They both had straight, black hair like my daughter did when she was born.  I was hesitant to check and see if they were boys or girls, because I wasn't sure that I wanted to know (while still actually pregnant), but I looked and they were boys. 

I'm not putting too much stock in it, since I've had dreams that I was pg when I wasn't, or that I was having a boy (or girl) when I was pg with a girl (or boy), or that I was pg with puppies or llamas, and I obviously wasn't.  But twins are definitely on my mind.

chels_c2000, I hope you get your betas back quickly so you can have some peace of mind.

Stacie, that is a tricky situation.  Of course it's difficult for your SIL, but I think you're right, it would be better for her to hear it from you.

[sagewinna]

I am still here... The cramping is less than yesterday and no new spotting so far today. I don't know what to think, yesterday I was sure it was the end.

[JunebugsMom]

really really nervous about getting bad news at my first appt. today.  I've been up since 4am worrying.

[loveandlight33]

I've been quite busy & lurking lately, but I wanted to drop in & say I'm thinking big positive thoughts for all of you ladies right now.

[ChiaraRose]

Thinking of you, Sagewinna and junebugsMom!!! My appointment is Friday and I am already nervous, even though I am not even sure if she will do an us or just give me a referral. One way or the other it is nervewracking!

Sagewinna, will you have an us soon?

[cameragirl]

I have my first real prenatal on Thursday, and FINALLY got an appointment with a perinatologist for 8/16. I'm so nauseated and tired, so I don't know why I worry, but I'm afraid an ultrasound might show bad news at the appointment.

[sagewinna]

I have an appointment on August 5th, I'll be 8w1d. The 2 I lost passed around 6 1/2 weeks, so if there is a heartbeat I will probably be in total and complete shock or get hysterical or something.

[KristaDJ]

I'm out. Bleeding. Pregnancy test is barely darker than a week ago. I"m not coming back to this DDC. As always, I hope the rest of you get to stay. <3

[lilkat]

So sorry, Krista

[chels_c2000]

Sorry Krista

I got some bad new with my blood work today. My progesterone levels are 14. My HCG was 351 at 18DPO no aweful but not great. He is starting me on supplements but we will see. I am not feeling very hopeful.

[sagewinna]

Oh, Chelsey, I hope things look up.

[cameragirl]

Originally Posted by chels_c2000 

Sorry Krista

I got some bad new with my blood work today. My progesterone levels are 14. My HCG was 351 at 18DPO no aweful but not great. He is starting me on supplements but we will see. I am not feeling very hopeful.

I'm so sorry that you're going through this. It isn't fun to sit there and wonder if things will be okay or not. Sending you some sticky dust!

[bcblondie]

Originally Posted by KristaDJ 

I'm out. Bleeding. Pregnancy test is barely darker than a week ago. I"m not coming back to this DDC. As always, I hope the rest of you get to stay. <3

Krista! I didn't even noticed you joined and now you're leaving?! I'm so sad. :( This isn't fair. Big hugs. :(

[bcblondie]

Originally Posted by chels_c2000 

Sorry Krista

I got some bad new with my blood work today. My progesterone levels are 14. My HCG was 351 at 18DPO no aweful but not great. He is starting me on supplements but we will see. I am not feeling very hopeful.

K wait. Call me crazy but I think these numbers are fine. Did I miss some previous numbers or something? Progesterone over 10 can support a pregnancy, and 350 at 18dpo seems pretty average to me.... My betas with this one were a lot lower than past times and the bean seems to be fine. If I extrapolate they would have been around the same as yours.

[JunebugsMom]

well whaddyaknow.  had my first appt and everything looks great!  the CNM did a quick u/s and said "there's the hearbeat, see it?  there's the brain, measuring 8wk 2d" (spot on)...then she just went on to the next subject, chattering away.  I sat there continuing to stare at the blank u/s screen and then 5 minutes later I'm like "so..the baby's ok??".  "Oh yes, the baby's perfect"....blah blah blah.  I was really in shock!  I guess I was really expecting bad news or to find twins or something.  Now I am trying to process the fact that this may actually happen...,.

[lilkat]

Yay! Great news, JunebugsMom!

[bcblondie]

Congrats june bug!!

[Brisen]

Krista, I'm so sorry for your loss.