I need advice about co-sleeping safety!

[RStelle]

I love co-sleeping with my 4 month old, but I'm worried that we are going to squish her.  Before she was born when we said we were going to co sleep people would warn us about this and I thought they were just being dumb, but there have been more than a few times now where one of us has rolled on her arm or she's ended up with a blanket over her head, etc.  She was sleeping in a snuggle nest--it's a little co-sleeper that goes in the bed with us, but now she wiggles out of it to be closer to us, so it isn't really safe to use anymore. A big part of the problem is that she wiggles all over the place so it's hard to keep track of where she is, and she'll end up under the blanket, even though it is far down on the bed. And my partner and I are both sound sleepers, so that is part of it too.

I can't even imagine how it would be to have her sleep in her crib, she doesn't sleep well without cuddles, and it would be so sad & also I don't know how it would work with her waking up to breastfeed, but I want her to be safe of course. Advice?

[mamaprovides]

If you are nervous about it...a cosleeper next to the bed is a sure fire way. I got one for my second because I was afraid that my then toddler would roll on her. I didn't like the cosleeper she was too far away from me and I couldn't nurse her while I slept. However, I think I'm in the minority on that one.

As far as cosleeping safety is concerned. I have found by the time they are 6M you can really start to let go of the nerves. In my humble opinion, the blankets are a bigger concern then one of you rolling on her. you may want to consider short sheeting your blankets. My husband and I each had our own separate blanket when cold. That helps with a lot of the worry. I also found that if I slept with a shirt unbuttoned and immediate access for the baby, that they didn't wander far. yea yea yea, shouldn't nurse through the night. I did it. I slept like a dream and everyone is fine. The other thing that we did (mostly when someone was sick) was put the bed against the wall and then put a VERY firm bolster pillow (I got from the yoga studio) against the wall so it was wall, bolster, baby, mom, (toddler,) dad.

About the scooching all over the bed...hmmm. See, I would try a bolster at her feet but I would worry about her taking a turn and landing underneath someone. Isn't the snuggle nest tilted? Maybe she is looking for something flat. If so, then may a foam contoured pillow for her to sleep in might do the trick.

I hope at least one of these things gets you closer to a relaxing night.

[RStelle]

Thanks...we have actually stopped using a blanket at all because it's been so hot out, so that has helped a lot. Also she's been sleeping in between both of us, so we are going to get a bed rail so she can sleep on my side...I think that will help too.

[blackannis]

I'd definitely get the bed rail so that she's only by one of you--that's what we ended up doing with our son, and it worked just fine. He also has a thing for sleeping flat, even now (he's 22 months), and will wiggle off my arm or pillows or anything else, or conversely, try to climb completely up onto them!