Help with Naps

[Erinla]

I'm a bit embarrassed to post this but you're the community I want to hear from so here goes! I'm committed to attachment parenting. I had a beautiful homebirth, I wear my baby,  we co-sleep at night, etc. As a wee one, one of my son's favorite places to nap became in the Moby wrap or in our arms. He's become very accustomed to napping "on body." (Having read the social-anthropological research in Our Babies Ourselves, this makes a lot of sense to me.) He's now almost 15 months old and I'm fantasizing about him taking naps in the pack-n-play and not strapped to my body in the Ergo or in my arms on the couch so I could have a few hours to get things done. I've only been able to successfully lay him down a handfull of times. I wait till he's "limp limbed" and then move at a snails pace to lower him down. Doesn't work. Usually he wakes up when he feels he's not in my arms. Also - his napping schedule isn't consistent. I've been a bit more "go with the river"  approach. rather than the "building dams" approach of making a rigid schedule. I couldn't do that anyway because I don't lay him down, he just falls asleep when he's tired. I often sit to nurse him or nurse him while he's in the ergo. When searching for support on helping him to graduate to napping in the pack-n-play, all the advice I see seems to be "let them cry it out." I feel frustrated  -  I haven't done 15 months of committed attachment parenting to now have him cry himself to sleep alone. Help! I'd be so much saner if I could have an hour or two a day to get some things done while my boy sleeps. Any advice? Share your mama wisdom please...Thanks.

[Cynthia Mosher]

Welcome to the Mothering community Erinla! I'm going to move this to Life with a Babe where it will get more focused attention. 

[Jayray]

I think you can do it, it will just take time for him to get used to a change--so it will be a lot of work.  You just need to decide on a way you want to put him to bed and do it consistently.  For example, rock him to sleep and put him in bed.  If he wakes up, rock him again and put him down again and just keep doing it until he stays asleep.  It could be frustrating for a while, but eventually he'll get it.  I think. :)

But I'm also a believer in consistent nap times.  I think it helps them go to sleep more easily. 

[remymom]

Hi! Wow can't believe you've been doing what I did for 4 months for 15 months!! I totally enjoyed having my baby sleeping in my arms for the first few months and got to relax as well and get lots of reading done. After around 4 months I started to feel like it might be best for both of us if he could sleep not in my arms. I felt my moving kept him from having a deeper sleep. He's also a big baby; 20 pounds at 6 months. I tried everything for nap times: in the Pack and Play, in his bouncy chair, on my bed, etc. At the beginning he'd often wake up once I put him down and I had to pick him up again and sometimes it would result in no nap at all. I think with persistence and the desire/need to have a bit of "me' time, he started getting used to sleeping on his own. The pack and play never worked. At the beginning he napped a lot in our bed. I'd bring the laptop into bed so I could check e-mails, etc. That was a big feat at the beginning. Now at 6 months he naps in his crib. The transition was not as difficult as I thought. Babies are pretty adaptable I think. I did have the moral support of a visiting mom from a community centre who encouraged me to put him down and let me know it was ok to do so. I have never let my son "CIO' but he does often fall asleep nursing. I've heard older babies don't fall asleep nursing as much. I think you may have to sacrifice things going smoothly for a little while but think long term. Also you have to feel confident that this change is for the best for the both of you. I think that helped me.

[northwoods]

I'm in the same boat, except my DD is 10 months. When I put her down she wakes up within a few minutes, and it can take me up to an hour to get her back to sleep. Then her schedule is all out of whack. I'm working on it, but can only do that when I have nothing else to do for the day, because she always ends up grouchy because she doesn't get in a good nap. If she naps in the sling, I can get computer work done (I work at home). Now she's big enough that I can't really do CIO anyway, because she can just get out of bed—we don't even have a crib.

So, sorry, no help here. But I'm interested in the feedback you get!

[motherhendoula]

Im with you RemyMom!  I think after 12 weeks i started to notice there was a pattern to DS's naps...i would sit in the recliner and nurse him and nap with him during his morning nap - but for after noon i would nurse him lying down in bed - now that hes older ...and i am getting slightly more sleep at night....i nurse him down for both naps - in our bed - i usually pack a few pillows around his lower body and back for that 'hugged tight" feeling.  We have a small apartment and i can hear any and all noise coming from our bedroom.  And now that he is nearly 1 yr - he can easily get down off the bed ....he actually got down and crawled out into the living room the other day!  He was also a 20 lb 6month old and now a 30 lb year old - i couldnt wear him for napping every day- it would drive me crazy!