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I'm back...

post #1 of 4
Thread Starter 

I guess I've been MIA for 6 months or so.  It was around that time that DH told me he wanted a divorce.  I was blindsided by that, in shock for a long time and just getting through each day, which unfortunately had a financial impact.  Hard to soak beans in advance when you can barely remember to cook and eat at all.  Fast forward to now; he moved out two weeks ago and now says he has no work.  So this week and next I'm going to have to totally buckle down and figure this out, take financial inventory (and pantry inventory!), make a plan to make do on as little as possible for the next few months without (hopefully) changing the status quo too much for the kids.  Fingers crossed; I know it's not a given.

 

We went through this when he was laid off a couple of years ago, so I've been through it before and it's nothing new, but I think this time it's going to be really really tight and...well, I was going to say stressful, but let's hope maybe I can manage  without too much stress.  There is so much stress flying around here, I think I've maxed out anyway.

 

I don't know how I'm going to make ends meet, but there has to be a way.  I hatehatehate transitions. 

 

Also, our leach field failed recently, so I'm figuring out some creative workarounds for that.

 

I am so relieved to have him out of the house.  It took me 6 months to be ready for that, and I'm glad we waited, but I am soooo ready now.  Down side is, he's moving 2 hours away (and somehow thinks we should be able to split 50/50, not that we even parented that way before).

 

I was able to work some barter with the music school for kids' summer camps.  There is a Time Trade in our town and I've gotten some house stuff fixed through that. 

 

Though today I went to the chiropractor, thrilled and relieved that we're on health insurance again (state), got adjusted and handed her my card, and they don't take it.  Grr.  Had to pay out of pocket.  (OMG-$50-OMG)  Won't make that mistake again.  Yikes.

 

My mom just visited and though things are tight for her also, she bought us groceries and bought me gas.  Thanks, Mom.

 

Time for us to eat out of pantry and see if we can no-spend.  Just after I make a Target run (wish I was kidding...I swear, just one last long-overdue trip and we're set for awhile...)

 

I need to fall-plant my garden.

 

I negotiated a raise recently.  I have a good job, and I can increase my hours as soon as I figure out how to manage that with the kids (I work at home and we homeschool.)  So that is something.

 

It's like, all of a sudden, with him gone, I can think about this stuff, where I was too muddled before.

 

I'm kind of anxious about joining the ranks of the struggling singles.  Hats off to everyone here in that category.  Hit me with your best tips, please...  Reassure me that my kids will be okay even as our already-frugal standard of living drops...

post #2 of 4

Worthy, I remember you.  (Did you change your screenname a while back?)  You're great at being frugal, I remember a lot of your posts and using a lot of tips you've posted.

 

As much of a struggle as it might be, you're thinking clearly now.  That's always a good thing.

post #3 of 4
Thread Starter 

Thanks, yes, I used to be amy-amanda.  One thing I have learned through these past few years is that being frugal does take more time and energy than throwing money at problems.  It is far more satisfying and often healthier, but sometimes the time and energy isn't there (and the money is, or the lure of it.)
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by FillingMyQuiver View Post

Worthy, I remember you.  (Did you change your screenname a while back?)  You're great at being frugal, I remember a lot of your posts and using a lot of tips you've posted.

 

As much of a struggle as it might be, you're thinking clearly now.  That's always a good thing.



 


Edited by worthy - 7/22/11 at 3:38pm
post #4 of 4
Quote:
Originally Posted by worthy View Post

Thanks, yes, I used to be amy-amanda.  One thing I have learned through these past few years is that being frugal does take more time and energy than throwing money at problems.  It is far more satisfying and often healthier, but sometimes the time and energy isn't there (and the money is, or the lure of it.)



I remember you too!  Oh, mama what an tough year you have had.  I hope you and your kids are well and adjusting after such a shock.  

 

I am not a single mom, but I often solo parent as dh travels quite a bit for work.  I have a couple of friends who are single parents and we have a tight friendship that has helped me through some of the tougher weeks when I have been on my own with kids, homeschooling, gardening, and all the rest.  They have been my best asset.  Like you said, having your head straight is the best medicine sometimes and having friends who can swap childcare while I sort out my feelings has been a godsend.  

 

You are the best at being frugal!  I remember your tips and techniques and was often inspired by your commitment.  You can do this.  And your kids will be fine.  Just love them.  That's all they ever really need. 

 

 

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