SAHM Feeling a Bit "Blah" - need some words of encouragement

[Redmom]

Hi everyone

I'm a SAHM to a beautiful 8 month old boy.

Lately the general day to day monotony has hit me.  I find myself saying goodbye to my husband in the mornings then counting down the hours till he returns.

I remind myself how lucky I am to be a Mom and to have a healthy and happy little boy.  I've joined a Mom's group and attend the events.  But still I can't shake the feeling of "Groundhog Day".

Also, just generally finding it tedious to entertain a baby all day - lately he has been wanting my attention more.  Then I feel guilty for having these thoughts.

On a side note, my little boy has been sleeping poorly - waking every 1-2 hours - for the last 4 months, so I'm just generally tired and exhausted.

It was my choice to be a SAHM and I did return to work briefly, so I've seen the other side of the fence and I know it's not all rosy.  I don't mean to sound ungrateful, I really just need to express how I feel right now.

I'd love to hear some words of encouragement from other MDC members.

Thanks!

[abiyhayil]

This is the calm before the storm and soon you little guy will be cruising!  Getting out is good for the both of you, but even when your doing chores with him in a carrier your LO benefits from your presence.

[CrunchyMama19]

Do you have any hobbies or activities that you do just for you? I find that it really helps to have that whether it be exercise, knitting, poetry, ect. Explain to your DH how important that is for you and work out a plan to give you some time for just you to pursue your own interests.

[Snapdragon]

getting out of the house, seeing other people as much as possible makes all the idfference for me. I even moved homes after having ds because where we were living was quite a far drive to get out to an area with stores,l people walking around down town, etcetera. NOw we live closer to that kind of thing and we go out a few times a day. DS is 17 months now but it was the same at 8 months. even going to the grocery store, post office, library, or taking a walk in the stroller where there are things for him to look at helps tons. It is even more so now that he is older- so that is my suggestion. Try not to isolate yourself at home- sometimes it is hard to make the effort to get out with a baby but I think it makes the day much more fun and less lonely.

[aparent]

    I read recently that mothers and babies

exchange cells before birth and that mothers

may carry a few of their children's cells in

their bodies for decades in some cases.

Your son is literally a part of you.

    I also read that there were perhaps 1600

generations of recognizable human beings

before we inherited the earth.  One thousand

six hundred mothers endured, cared, got tired

and felt all the feelings a human being can feel

during their days as a mother with each one

absolutely necessary for you to be who you

are and where you are with your little boy.

   You are physically alone with your son but

perhaps those 1600 mothers before you are

also there with you in some way that might be

encouraging. 

[Redmom]

Thanks for all your feedback and suggestions.

I do belong to a Mom's group and enjoy the events, plus take DS to playgroup a few days a week.  I think the sleep deprivation adds to the feelings a lot - if we all got better sleep I feel I'd be more enthused about the day ahead.

I had no idea being a Mommy would be so challenging!!!!

[CrunchyMama19]

being a mom is challenging but worth it! And as he grows and gets more interactive and you can "do" more with him it gets really fun. Yes it presents it's own challenges but it is really different as they get older. Remember that this is just a season of life, things will change, you may add another to the mix, and he grows and matures into a unique person that fills your day with fun and amazement!

[wombato]

I can relate!  I definitely felt like that at that time in my son's life (he's only 2 and a few months now).  I felt "stuck" in the house, as my child was breastfeeding a whole lot, needing to be held a lot, etc.  Just generally not an "easy baby."  Now, of course, he's running around and likes to get out and about.  Hugs and support!

[MrsBone]

I catch myself feeling this way sometime, and also resentful because DH is gone so much and I end up doing mostly everything at home. it makes me sad sometimes, but then I remind myself just how incredibly lucky I am to be able to stay at home and have a comfortable lifestyle...when I tell myself that it makes me feel better. I can't imagine doing what he does, so I obviously don't know how he feels. I'm sure he feels the same way sometime and I try and remind myself that it's not necessarily better on the other side.

[MrsBone]

Also, I wanted to mention, are you involved in a church at all? I've found that being a regular part of a church body in the past year has helped me tremendously. Everyone is always willing to help out, there are usually activities planned for families a couple times a month. I don't know, I like to keep busy though, so that may not suit you as well. Do you cosleep with your baby? I remember cosleeping with DS and sleeping much better when I could pop a boob in his mouth and pass back out. It was so important for me to sleep. Do you sleep with your baby sleeps? With only one child, that's so easy to do! I know you may feel like you want to do something for yourself, or just veg out instead of sleeping, but if you can refresh yourself before bedtime it may help your mood a bit!

[gitanamama]

I definitely feel you mama! I think it's totally normal to have highs and lows, and I believe that we weren't meant to parent in isolation...even if it's just during the day. I work at home with kiddos so I know how tedious it can be to spend all day in the "baby zone." I agree with the other recommendations to get involved in mom's groups or church or whatever community options appeal to you. As cliche as it sounds, I believe so strongly that it takes a village to raise a child...and to support a new mama! Even just finding a group of women you can meet up with at the park might help get rid of the blahs. In the beginning it feels sort of silly to take a baby on "outings" since they can't really do anything, but I think getting out is important for the mama's well being. I bet if you find a "tribe" you'll feel less lonely and stuck. 

[jesslsch]

 I was happy to come across your post today because I was searching for people who can relate to me. I have been a SAHM since my daughter was born last May and I am very blessed to be able to spend this time with her. Lately I've been struggling with feeling like I have to justify what I do all day to others, my husband thinks this is all in my head which it probably is but it is still how I feel. Also I have never before felt so exhausted and lazy at the same time. It is hard to explain but being a SAHM is mentally exhausting, completing the simplest tasks take ten more steps than they used to which is hard for ppl to understand. For instance to do the laundry I have to carry my daughter upstairs, with me into each room while I gather all the laundry, carefully carry her and the laundry into the basement etc... Going anywhere takes a half hour which was a shock to me since I'm a get up and go person. I don't want you to think this is how I feel everyday but I do get stressed sometimes, usually at night when she's gone to sleep I have time to miss her and regain some peace. Can anyone relate to these feelings or am I a lone crazy, mean, lazy wolf?

[jesslsch]

I can relate as well, there are definately highs and lows.