Post Partum Party Line

[guatemama1]

I thought I would open a space to discuss PP issues & thoughts...

I am 10 days PP now and just barely able to sit again square on my butt - turns out the Boppy is a good PP sit pillow. I've been BF'ing side lying this whole time!

I'm feeling rather antsy to get up and about but my MW insists, and I mean insists, I do nothing for 2 weeks. On top of that I do feel kinda sore still down below, like in my bones. But I'm sick of eating laying on my side. I have memories of the past few nights dinner on my sheets and robe. Niiiice.

And now that I know what nursing bras are supposed to do, I wish I could run out and get the "right" one. Oh well..makin' due!

I hope all the PP mamas out there are healing well & healing quickly!

[HidaShara]

Put me in the "rough PP recovery boat", though not as rough as some mammas, I bet!  I had a 2nd degree tear during delivery and didn't heed my midwife's instructions to "relax and don't sit crosslegged".  By my 5 day appointment it turns out I'd torn out a bunch of the stitches.  So I've been on bedrest for the 5 days since then, hoping the tissues will heal properly *without* the stitching - if they don't, I have to do a consult with an OB, get re-cut, and stitched up again.  Back to square 1, in other words.

My uterus seems to be shrinking okay, but I've also been SUPER constipated since delivery, in part I'm sure because I can't "push" against my no-stitches, and I have a tonne of hemorrhoids. :(  All the extra "bulk" in my abdomen is NOT helping me feel better!  Some days I wake up with such intense abdominal pain I'm ready to be carried to an ER.  At first I thought it might be a UTI or worse but... no.  Just crap. :P

All I can say is, I am SO looking forward to being healed and living my new life as a SAHM of two!  Until this stupid healing gets seriously underway, I really can't handle DD1.  I have my mum here waiting on me hand-and-foot, which is helping a lot.  But she'll be gone after this weekend!  I better be better!!!!

There's my sob story. ;)  The good news is, Una is an AMAZING baby!  Thriving like crazy, nurses like a champ, sleeps the rest of the time, and is super good at self-soothing.  I couldn't ask for a better PP recovery baby!  

[greenmama66]

I've recovered well- am still in bed at day 6 and bleeding is minimal so it's light pads only now.I was amazed at lack of afterpains as well- I think it's because I was really careful to get that liquid cal/mag in daily and am still doing so. My bottom has been fine and I took a look at it yesterday with my hand held mirror and was pretty amazed- guess my midwife was right but it's my 6th baby/homebirth and my easiest birth yet so I am grateful. I do however feel fragile, I have been taking my placenta and some Chinese herbs so hopefully that will help and I do notice I get fatigued when I get up too often (say for wipes as the wipe warmer is on nappy changer ) and we are just hanging out in bed nursing. Julian never fusses and I have been able to get great sleep every night (I hardly wake when he wants to nurse and then we just fall back asleep together) so that's been really helpful.

He did have tongue tie which I noticed by day 2 and I had to go out on day 4 to get it clipped and went swiftly back in bed- that felt like a lot of exertion on my part. Now that that's done nursing has been a breeze- before it was painful causing me sore nipples and such because he wasn't extracting efficiently. He looks like he's grown in 6 days- I love the newborn phase, it's so sweet and mourn this being my last........... so I am relishing this very sweet time.

[SuburbanHippie]

I had to use my Boppy last time as a hemorrhoid pillow.  Otherwise I couldn't sit down.  Ouch.

I'm feeling pretty blah lately.  DH hasn't had a day off work since he took a week off when I had the baby so basically 12 days straight of him working 12-16 hour shifts.  I feel so distanced from him and it's just killing me.  It doesn't help that we haven't slept in the same bed since two days before I delivered.  It makes me so sad.  He finally has this weekend off, but he's so tired that I have a feeling that we're just going to fight.  I'm overwhelmed by cooking of all things.  All of my frozen dinners are gone now and I'm completely uninspired to cook.  Not to mention that as soon as I start, the baby starts to cry and I can't hold her while I cook (and the Moby wrap makes my incision sore).  Oh, and to make matters worse YDS is now going wheat-free to see if that helps some of his issues (growth, dental, and behavioral).  It's exhausting, both physically and mentally.

But I suppose this is what I signed up for so whatever.  I'm just glad I didn't take any summer courses like I was going to.  If I had to do homework on top of all of this, I would probably go bananas. 

[JoEngland]

Originally Posted by SuburbanHippie 

I had to use my Boppy last time as a hemorrhoid pillow.  Otherwise I couldn't sit down.  Ouch.

I'm feeling pretty blah lately.  DH hasn't had a day off work since he took a week off when I had the baby so basically 12 days straight of him working 12-16 hour shifts.  I feel so distanced from him and it's just killing me.  It doesn't help that we haven't slept in the same bed since two days before I delivered.  It makes me so sad.  He finally has this weekend off, but he's so tired that I have a feeling that we're just going to fight.  I'm overwhelmed by cooking of all things.  All of my frozen dinners are gone now and I'm completely uninspired to cook.  Not to mention that as soon as I start, the baby starts to cry and I can't hold her while I cook (and the Moby wrap makes my incision sore).  Oh, and to make matters worse YDS is now going wheat-free to see if that helps some of his issues (growth, dental, and behavioral).  It's exhausting, both physically and mentally.

But I suppose this is what I signed up for so whatever.  I'm just glad I didn't take any summer courses like I was going to.  If I had to do homework on top of all of this, I would probably go bananas. 

You poor thing!!! Big hugs to you.  Hopefully it gets easier soon!

Perhaps there's a family member/neighbor/friend you can recruit to help?

[greenmama66]

I couldn't sit down after my first birth (twins) and my midwife remarked I had the most swollen vulva she had ever seen- it was awful but gets better with time........and at the time (over 20 years ago) I didn't even have sitz bath herbs, pillows or anything special- it was areal ouch.

I gave baby a bath today with me, he enjoyed it, his skin is still so peely from him being late- I keep putting olive oil on it but think I may switch to hemp oil to see if that helps a bit more.

[medmom7]

Sore nipples, couple of stitches, hemorrhoids...ouch! I HIGHLY recommend sitz baths for the hemorrhoid/perineal issues, I feel like the daily or twice daily sitz is what is making the biggest difference in healing the hemorrhoids and now can sit without wincing. Love the Jack Newman (available via prescription from compounding pharmacies) cream for sore nipples. Also motherlove rhoid balm good both for nipples and bottoms and also Belly Bliss Niperi wash spray (I bet the Earth Mama bottom spray would be similiar). Also stool softener and Benefiber powder. These are the things that have gotten me back up and running this time around.

[junobella]

I'm glad this thread has been started, I've been wondering how other fellow mamas are doing. Sorry to all of you who are having a rough time, it will get better...but I know that doesn't make today any easier! My PP recovery was waaay harder after my 1st. This is my 2nd and I'm feeling pretty good. I was feeling great until yesterday eve when I went pee and noticed somewhat of a bladder prolapse!!!!! It isn't protruding out, but it is right there. It freaked me out and sent me over the edge for sure. I called the nurse today and she said it's pretty normal. I'm just scared it will get worse. I have to stop picking up my 3 yr old DS, which makes me sad.

My other rough spot is being pretty emotional over dealing with my feelings between both children. I'm having somewhat of a difficult time letting go of my routine I had with DS, it just makes me so sad that he's not my one and only any more. However, he's so happy and doing great with LO so it's making it better.

My LO is 6 days PP and the perfect baby so far. I love this babymoon phase. He's so mellow and sleeps and his awake time is alert and calm. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that this personality sticks, but I know it's early.

My DS was borderline colicky and I'm nervous for that 3 week mark when we'll find out if the fuss takes over. I mostly worry about how it will affect my DS as he's such a sensitive guy and I think it would really upset him with LO cryng so much. I'm doing my best to just relax and enjoy this time w.o so much worry about what could come.

I'm also way more relaxed this time around with baby #2, which is great. I was a nervous anxious wreck when DS was a baby.

For those with roids, don't forget your stool softners! I forgot mine the last couple days and I wish I didn't!!!

[Curlyfry7]

Guatemama, if your behind keeps hurting when you sit down, you could have dislocated your tailbone!! It happened to me with my DD and again with this baby, although not as badly this time. Easily replaced with chiro work too.

I'm healing pretty well overall, but am a lot more tired than I remember being with either of my other 2. I have pretty much no help though-my parents left when DS was 5 days old, and DH had to go back to work after 1 week, plus works at his own business at night so is never here at night except for a few hours, so I have to deal with all 3 kids by myself. I am pretty overwhelmed most of the time, and wish I could "babymoon" more as this is our last. I only have sat in the bath a couple times, and I can't nap with 2 other kids running around. With my ODS the house would be burned down for sure. Even this weekend I had hoped to have a relaxing weekend but will need to take advantage of DH being home a bit more and get some stuff done.

Baby has been a change from my other 2 to some extent-both of the others were (are!!) terrible sleepers, very high needs, couldn't be put down babies with severe reflux. DD also had a posterior tongue tie, which was a $%#% to get diagnosed and corrected. Baby boy sleeps a LOT (I am almost afraid to say it!) and while he does fuss and cry he also will allow me to put him down for a little bit here and there.It's too early to say about the reflux-I'm hoping to NOT have to pull dairy and soy out of my diet again-dairy wasn't too bad but soy was HARD. My nipples are still pretty painful from the tongue tie which i am hoping heals up soon.

I'm not sure what to do with a baby that sleeps...when do you start to try to get their days and nights turned back around?? My other 2 were so bad we just prayed they would sleep SOMETIME-when ODS was 2 weeks old he was awake for 10 hours straight-it was awful.

[greenmama66]

Curly- my baby also had tongue tie and I got it clipped on day 4 (he's now 7 days old) and my nipples were really sore/crusty. I use Earth mama nipple balm and the left side is all healed but right side was more severe and just about healed.

My last 3 babies have been really good sleepers so no issues there ( I don't eat dairy, soy, grains, gluten, sugar, caffeine etc;) and I'm hoping little baby stays this way.......time will tell- he's been so easy. My first two (twins) were horrible sleepers and still are at 20 plus years of age- hasn't improved- they've had insomnia their whole life it seems.

[guatemama1]

Today the MIL arrived to critique my breast feeding and scowl at the way I hold the baby... hahaha... oh well... that's what MIL's are for across cultures I think :)

Like others have said, it's very nice to have a chill baby so far as I rest & heal. (Knock on wood) Baby hasn't cried in like 2 days, just chills and acts all cute. MIL is impressed by that.

As a 1st timer I am a little surprised at how time consuming and physically demanding breast feeding is. I'm glad I'm doing it, definitely something I'm committed to, but sheeeesh first the breaking in of the nipples, then the leakage, then the crazy hunger & thirst, then doing it so often... When does breast feeding become easier? Like how women make it look so easy? Will I leak for the next 2 years? I guess these are questions for the breast feeding forums but I like you all best :)

[tourist.]

I'm about 16 days PP and things are going really well even though baby decided last night that he suddenly wasn't going to sleep all the time and I could *not* get him to lay down to go to sleep...I eventually just gave up and held him and slept with him (after I let him sleep on me for 2 hours while I watched tv...what was I thinking? ugh.).  Today he was pretty much awake from 10 am to nearly 3 pm which is a pretty long stretch for him.  He was happy as long as he was being held or nursing....I hope that that isn't a sign of things to come, I'd really like to be able to set this little guy down sometimes, but if I have to wear him - so be it.  

I do have to say that I'm SOOO happy with my boobs.   Last time I was pumping right away due to DS1's latch issues, so even when he had figured out how to nurse I had crazy supply and had to pump for relief all the time.  I literally didn't leave the house without my pump for fear of becoming engorged - for like a year.  This time the whole breastfeeding experience has been absolutely wonderful and my supply is totally even and it's great.  I had sore nipples but only right at the start and ... I'm just so happy because last time it was such a difficult thing for me.  

[sarafi]

Okay ladies I am right there with you on the hemorrhoid issue. Ouch. I had one the whole pregnancy, and it got worse after delivery. It bleeds so badly all.the.time. and I called the doctor about it two days ago when I  bleed so much that I was starting to get light-headed (and I am not at all squeamish about blood) but he never called back and it is actually starting to bleed less now.  I am just going to keep up with the iron supplements until this resolves--not at all constipated (luckily) so I am not worried about that.

Does anyone else have an extremely sleepy baby???? This is my fourth, so I would think I would remember but the girl sleeps all day, and for 6-8 hours straight/night. Waking her up during the day is pretty hard-earned as well, but at this point middle of the night feedings are seemingly impossible. We are only 6 days PP, so hopefully this will change a bit but I don't see how my milk will keep up if she keeps sleeping all night. I turn music on/lights on/undress her and just eventually give up as she won't wake at night to eat. My second was "failure to thrive" and he had similar sleep patterns, so I think (hope) I am more worried than maybe I need to be. I will know Wed. when we go to the doc. to weigh in, but she has tons of wet/poopy diapers (cloth mostly so it's pretty easy to tell) but still I worry.

[sarafi]

Originally Posted by tourist. 

I do have to say that I'm SOOO happy with my boobs.   Last time I was pumping right away due to DS1's latch issues, so even when he had figured out how to nurse I had crazy supply and had to pump for relief all the time. 

So glad for you also! It's so nice to have the experience to really be able to appreciate when things go well.

[tourist.]

Originally Posted by sarafi 

So glad for you also! It's so nice to have the experience to really be able to appreciate when things go well.

Thanks!  It has really been wonderful.  It was such a rough start with nursing for me last time that I'm constantly in awe that it can ever be this natural feeling.  

I still have a pretty sleepy baby, with the exception of the one 5 hour stretch he was awake the other day.  I think it took him nearly two weeks before he would be awake for more than 30 minutes every 5 hours.  Even now at 2 weeks and 4 days he's still really sleepy.  Yesterday he slept for what seemed like forever, then when he woke up all he wanted to do was nurse for two hours straight.  I'm not sure where all this milk is going cause surely his belly isn't that big.  I hope your daughter is getting plenty during the times she's awake.  According to her diapers, it sounds like she is. 
 

[mamahen2coop]

I haven't read the whole thread, but I'm wondering what's the wait time on returning to regular, um, "activities"? I know with DS1 they said 6 weeks but is it really that long? I dont know if it was the much smaller head or no tears but I feel awesome so far. Not that I want to resume our normal DTD yet but it's crossed my mind, weird I know!

[tourist.]

I think the standard is always 6 weeks although I know lots of women do it earlier. And that's not weird at all. DH and I haven't done "it" yet, but we've amused ourselves in other ways. I will be three weeks pp tomorrow and am still bleeding on and off....if it weren't for that I'd likely be up for trying sooner than later but I feel all bleh right now.

The freaking bleeding is driving me nuts!!!! I just had to get that out. Lol It's not much bleeding, but I'm seriously ready for it to stop.

[greenmama66]

Originally Posted by mamahen2coop 

I haven't read the whole thread, but I'm wondering what's the wait time on returning to regular, um, "activities"? I know with DS1 they said 6 weeks but is it really that long? I dont know if it was the much smaller head or no tears but I feel awesome so far. Not that I want to resume our normal DTD yet but it's crossed my mind, weird I know!

Right after birth my MW told DH even though I was normal/ down there/didn't look like I had a baby we have to avoid any hanky panky for 6 weeks.......lol

[Novus]

Thank you, thank you, thank you for this thread!!!  Just reading about other PP mamas is helpful!  I've been really taken by surprise at how hard this recovery time has been.  I'm 11 days PP and still have a really sore perineum--to the point where I've really been avoiding sitting up as much as possible.  Luckily, I've been able to walk around the neighborhood some the past 3 days and we went to a friend's house today, so that's helped me feel better mentally, but I really wish the physical healing would happen faster!  DH has been home and will be home for the rest of the week (thank goodness!), but starting on Monday, I'll have to handle both kids by myself and I just don't know how I'm going to do that if I'm still stuck in bed most of the day.  Surely, 2 full weeks after delivery, I should be healed enough to be mostly normal, right?  I hope?

I had much worse tearing with DS1 and I feel like my recovery was still shorter/easier than it is this time.  This PP recovery is making me think very seriously about having this bub be our last one.  On the other hand, breastfeeding is going much better this time and the baby is much more mellow.  I'm going to have to work really hard on being more patient with my 2YO once DH is back at work though.  It's easy right now b/c I'm not the one dealing with him most of the time.

[guatemama1]

Originally Posted by tourist. 


The freaking bleeding is driving me nuts!!!! I just had to get that out. Lol It's not much bleeding, but I'm seriously ready for it to stop.

Ditto! I'm about 16 days PP and figured I should be getting up & about again soon. However, still bleeding, still a bit sore if I stand or sit for too long (started being able to sit upright a few days back which revolutionized my small bed-ridden world). I know bleeding will go on longer and actually my visiting MIL said I should be totally resting and in bed for at 20-25 days, so I guess I've got another week of hanging out. I've never had a physical experience like PP healing - it takes a lot of patience to treat myself right, even if I feel pretty good, I should keep milking (no pun intended ha) the time to rest and be tended to by others :)

I'm finding myself slightly checked out of motherhood sometimes. I'm a happy gal but it sure does take some getting used to.. being someone's 'everything' now. My DH can sleep, go to the store, whatever, but my time is limited in any task I do like showering, catching up on email, trying to crochet a little... cuz when it's time to nurse, it's time to nurse. It makes me realize how much my life has changed, ya know, like it's no longer all about me. Revelation. It's true there's only so much a book or someone's advice can teach ya until it finally happens... I'm a mama.