Heckedy Peg - I just notced your paragraph on "weird" Pagans and could not agree more. I'm a second generation Pagan, raised by a Wiccan mother, and I've been involved with the local community and festival circuit for most of my life. There are a whole lot of Pagans out there who seem to be Pagan just so that that can further marginalize themselves with their strange beliefs and behaviors. They're like the Fred Phelps of Paganism, giving the rest of us a bad name through their loud abnoxiousness. I have had to withdraw from a lot of the community, stop reading the magazines, and generally go stealth with my own community becuase the whack jobs anger me so much. In any group that is marginalized by society, you're going to find a large segment that like it that way, and even push it farther in that direction. I've seen it with Pagans, punks, and LGBTQ people. The wounded and mentally unhealthy tend to gravitate towards all of those groups, and similar ones.
~~The August Pagan Parents Party ~~ - Page 2
Interesting pagans spin-off: Didn't we have a discussion about the word witch recently? I think Unschoolma brought it up and how or if we identify ourselves with that term? I remember my response about how I use that term for me in that it means something different than the super dark, goth-y image that some individuals might envision.
I wonder how much of that holds true in culture today? I.e. a witch is dark, goth like and etc... cus I kind of find that sole image to be limiting once you learn more about the spirituality of the goddess.
Edited by _ktg_ - 8/6/11 at 6:18am
I am supposed to be packing for our week long trip to the beach in Delaware. For some reason I have decided there will be no food and we will starve. I've made more bread, brownies, and packed bags and bags of vegetables. It feels like "nesting" without the pregnancy! hahaha. I'm also so excited my nerves are kind of shot - you know. Every time I eat something I want to throw up... gosh this is sounding like pregnancy! oh man... anticipation!!
Hope everyone has a great weekend. Please send my family safe traveling thoughts!! Will be sending out the same for all of you other road warriors this weekend.
Edited by vydalea - 8/12/11 at 12:05pm
Oh, nevermind, then...sigh. I live in western NC. Hoping to move to MA, but I have to get my house sold first! Still no showings or bites. I hope someone comes soon, because there isn't a whole lot of wiggle room to keep lowering the price and still allow room for an offer
Here's to safe travels, vydalea. Is your nick somehow related to the onions? Even though it's not spelled the same?
ETA: new profile pic of me with my shorter hair-- which is way blonde now, too. That's the color I had all my growing up years. I don't know why it got dark with age.
Puttin' on my mod hat...
In the past, the MDC User Agreement asked that members refrain from "name calling". Posts that described other individuals (or groups) in negative terms were removed, and the members who wrote them were asked to edit those posts before the posts could be returned to the board. Under the new MDC User Agreement, members are asked to keep the boards friendly and respectful and moderators have been asked to place reminders of this in threads where the tone is starting to "drift" and ask that people voluntarily edit their posts to keep the tone positive, respectful, and supportive.
It is especially important in a "support only" forum like Spirituality that individuals and groups be treated with utmost respect and love. Please help me (as a moderator) keep MDC a wonderful and welcoming community by checking your posts for comments or terms that might make another member uncomfortable, or feel like they are not accepted because of their behaviors, beliefs, personal style, and so on.
A long time ago I read a wonderful book my Mercedes Lackey. In it, an individual who belonged to a normative religion asked the main character (a Pagan) why members of alternative groups were so "strange". She explained that when you grow up "feeling different" (for whatever reason, different opinions, abilities, gender orientation, etc) you are in for a lot of pressure from the normative society. And down the road, even if you find a community where you differences "fit in", you've still internalized a lot of baggage about your own self worth and ability. Having a hard time expressing your individuality in a way that translates well to others is just a visible reminder that not everyone makes it through life without some serious pain, and that not everyone has found a way to grow through this pain to balance their inner self with their outer presenation.
Soooooo... again with Mod Hat firmly in place.... please do check your posts and consider editing them to remove comments that would cause further pain to fellow Pagans (and humans in general!) who may already be struggling.
Now back to your regularly scheduled thread!
That said, Clay, I used to be one of those gothy Pagans...but for the life of me I can not explain why I wore both pentagrams and rosaries on my leather jacket I always "felt different" too, and as a punk rocker I finally found a group that I fit in with. And we used to sit around and condemn, rather contemptuously, people that followed the norm-- flannel and denim wearing people who listened to Led Zeppelin because they never bothered to find out that there were alternatives I know, right? We were SO condescending.
Only-- years and years later, I mean it took me that long to realize, that we conformed, our ownselves, within our alternative group. I saw a one-frame comic that perfectly described it. In it, three young women, all wearing black Tshirts and smoking cigarettes, looking pretty much exactly alike (but different from the mainstream) sat on a low wall, watching a man walk by with short hair and a suit on. They're all watching him, and one of the women says, in a blaming, disdainful way, "Conformist!" Get it? At that point I was able to laugh at myself.
Sometimes it takes people a long time to let the pendulum swing back to the middle. For me, my job is to be the best Pagan I can be, because I don't know that I'm not the only Pagan anybody will ever meet. So it's my responsibility to represent us all in a kind, positive, respectful manner. But it took me years to get to that point. AND years in recovery, which is where I learned it.
Thank you, ktg, for the compliment!
Today and tomorrow I'm watching my friend S's dd, L, who is ds's best friend. I'm going to make them pizza later, and I've taken out the pear sauce/pie filling out of the freezer and am going to make a pear pie. Bring on Autumn! Although it's likely to remain very hot for the foreseeable future, the next week's forecast is mostly below 90 for a change. 88, 87, 86, but BELOW 90. Finally I think the tide is turning. It's been relentlessly 90 since MAY, I kid you not. This is highly unusual for here-- and we haven't had rain in at least a month. Today is 60% chance-- and dang it, it's sunny out
Oh, maia, I wish you were closer! And your hair is loverly, mah dear. :-)
Clay-thanks for the mod-ly reminder. ;-)
I've a cranky preschooler, a 106 high for the day, said cranky butts last bball game, and a load of cleaning to do. Started the day off right with a yoga class and a walk (indoors at the y, thankyouverymuch) ... My instructors choice of focus for the class was perfect. It was all about the heat (and life) causing stress hormones in our bodies, leaving us with the fight-or-flight/sympathetic nervous response that doesn't kmnow when to shut down. Last night I bumped my van into my parents neighbors car, leaving a dent that will have to be repaired on their car and a rear light on my van that needs replacing. Could have been worse, and they were very gracious about it, but I didn't realize till I got on the mat just how keyed up I still was. Class helped a bit, though I might do some more grounding work later.
I officially exhausted my local library's pagan type books a long time ago. there is like, 3. It's a small but wonderful little library that doesn't charge late fees so I hate going up to the bigger one a few minutes away. I think I still owe them money from 3 years ago, lol. I might need to though and check to see if they have cottage witchery. Also a great one I got there years back called "Kitchen Witch" that I read before I even came to grips with fully leaving Christianity. hm.
So anyway, much cleaning and dyeing yarn this weekend.
wow, that makes so much sense! The week the heat was awful here, also happened to be the week I was experiencing a health problem, I was a total wreck.
I was just reading about the flight/fight response and how in some people, it can get way out of control. Exercise has really helped me, as well as eating better. My main problem has been sleep. I start to fall asleep fine, but all of a sudden I will get this rush/panicky feeling and I have to start winding down all over again.
Anyways, your post was very helpful to me.
I'm glad, Aeress! I also have been reading a lot about cortisol, etc, this past year + via Mark Sisson and other Primal/Paleo types. What have you been reading?
Incidentally, in class we worked on releasing the sacrum and the base of the skull/upper cervical spine. Apparently these are the two major centers for stimulating either the sympathetic or parasympathetic response. who knew?
I have a big ball of stress coming up on the 14th regarding my ex and children. Please keep us in your thoughts. Especially strength and protection. I was actually really drawn to do a ritual of some sort but it's been so long since I've done any sort of ritual I don't even know where to begin. :( Any thoughts for a "cerebral" pagan? I do more reading and communing than ritual work, though I really have always said I want to get into that aspect more. And my increased yoga practice is bringing that desire to the forefront.
Thanks for the reminder Clay. Just to be clear, when I said "weird" I meant sexually inappropriate and/or actively acting as energy vampires. I suppose harmful would have been a more appropriate word! I could not be around that because it just wasn't safe. I have certainly met MORE kind wonderful people in the community than not, and happy to say that all of you are pretty awesome too! :)
Fox: I think it's a bit tricky whenever we are involved in a community when there are others (and there always are) who don't really fit into our idea of what we want the community to be. If you want to distance yourself, you feel judgmental, but you know if you stay involved you'll be unhappy or uncomfortable. Sorry you're having trouble with your community IRL.
Maia: I like your hair!
vydalea: safe travels, and enjoy the beach!
Millie: interesting thoughts about the heat and stress hormones. Is it an accepted thought that heat causes more aggression? I remember reading something about a higher incidence of rioting when it's hot out ... hmm, I'll have to look that up. Good luck with the ex!
I'm so excited; tomorrow DH, DS and I are going on our first hike with a little hiking group (aka my friends, lol) that I put together ... we are hoping to get ourselves in shape to hike Half Dome next summer in Yosemite. I hiked HD 5 years ago, but I'm SO out of shape right now, I really need to train hard!!
[edited: spelling and incoherent sentences]
Edited by HeckedyPeg - 8/6/11 at 11:33pm
How about a simple freezer spell? Do you need to keep him away? I did that once with my ex, a long time ago. I never saw him again PM me if you want to know how I did it. Even though it's years hence, I still don't feel comfortable publishing my spells and the results thereof...I dunno why. Just instinct. Listen to your gut, I always say
I am reading The Peach Keeper by Sarah Addison Allen. Just started it. She's a local author and this is her 4th book. While they're not specifically witchy, they all incorporate some sort of magic-y things. I have read all the others before this one. They all take place in relatively rural NC and I LOVE them. This one is brand new and I'm so happy I was able to snag it at the library!
Then I also got these, which are next in line:
Rita Mae Brown "Hotspur"
Jenine Cummins "The Outside Boy"
Charles Frazier "Cold Mountain" (saw the movie and loved it)
and Clay, you oughtta be interested in this:
"Steampunk Prime" edited by Mike Ashley
Off to War! Fingers crossed all goes well, the babe stays put till we get home, and we all have fun!
Enjoy, be bibbly, have fun, eat gooey good things, etc! :)
(and thanks all... it's never fun wearing the mod hat in a thread where you spend a lot of time, but you still gotta do it, you know? :) Kinda like Garibaldi, ages ago in Babylon 5. A member of the resistance AND the head of station security. LOL)
Keeping him away is a bit unreasonable, as he has visitation with the kids, etc. At first I couldn't place what I need, but I really think it's protection from him wanting to do harm to me. He has been attacking me from all fronts for the better part of the year on a number of things regarding the kids and I just feel like he's over there wanting bad for me, and that can't be great for me for a sustained amount of time, right? There are very present issues that may be affected by his actions, but there is also just the spiritual protection I am wanting.
Though him going away and leaving me alone forever sounds just peachy, it's not really applicable here. lol
Maia, I saw the hair a few days ago and wanted to mention I love it! Looks fantastic!
Happy and Blessed Lughnasadh!
When I was about 25-26 I was feeling kind of isolated so I put myself out there and met a series of really REALLY weird people who called themselves Pagans and it just ... I don't know, I guess I got kind of disgusted. Now, I've met many beautiful Pagan people online and IRL, but for some reason at this time in my life I felt like I just couldn't handle it (I mean those people in particular not the community in general - seriously, they were really strange and CREEPY! Like, all energy vampires and just really YUCKY energy); that plus the criticism from family, and feeling like I couldn't be open, it was just too much and I stepped away from it all. I was kind of floating around in a spiritual way, still feeling very connected to God/dess, but not observing any Sabbats and basically neglecting my spiritual needs. At this time I also had a lot of Jewish friends and was dating Jewish men- I started asking questions. I always thought Judaism was Christianity without Jesus, but found that I was very wrong! My then BF (now DH) took me to my first Friday night Shabbat service and I was enchanted. I started doing a lot of research and found that the Goddess was so present in Judaism; this made me feel very comfortable. I also loved that there was such an emphasis on nature, and healing the world, and there's even a holiday celebrating trees!
I felt like I found something that jived with my Pagan side, but was also very traditional and family oriented, and I just had all the warm fuzzies. I also felt it was more "acceptable" to be Jewish (and I realize this speaks to a deeper issue, and I feel differently *now*, but it was important at the time) ... anyway- I spent a lot of time just going to services, reading about things, then eventually took a Judaism 101 at a synagogue near our house, and as my relationship with DH grew I felt more and more like I could be a Jew ... so I started the conversion process, took more classes, learned to read Hebrew (pretty cool language) - but at the end I could never pull the trigger. Every major Jewish idea that I loved, I loved because it reminded me of Paganism. I was living like a Jew, but thinking about my Pagan days, and missing things and just feeling confused. Then I was pregnant, and DH and I got married in a civil ceremony; I was supposed to finish my conversion and do the mikvah while pregnant so the baby would be born a Jew. And we found out that DS was a BOY so that started the whole circumcision thing, and I just kept putting it off and putting it off, and then suddenly he was born and I hadn't been converted and neither of us was Jewish. And I decided that no son of mine would ever get circumcised before adulthood, which means they won't convert him- also, I think there is a big difference between being "born" a Jew (ie: born to Jewish parents and raised Jewish) and being converted as a baby ... and so here I am- pretty confused. I love so many things about Judaism, but I don't think I'm cut out for Religion. I think a lot of our traditions are man made, and that there is nothing wrong with that- but I don't like being told that I'm doing something WRONG or that I have to do XYZ to belong. The circ'ing issue has created a lot of tension between DH and I. He says that if I had told him "upfront" that I didn't want to raise DH Jewish and didn't want to circ him it would not have been a problem, but he's mad b/c I changed my mind. I told him I had no idea that my mind would change. I just feel now that I am getting back to the path I was meant to be on the whole time. I have a deep appreciation for Judaism, but I don't think I could ever finish converting, because I don't think my heart is in it 100%. I love that I have learned so much about it, and that I can participate in the traditions and holidays with my husband and his family, but I don't feel like I'll ever really belong, because I'm just too Pagan in my heart.
Welcome:) so glad you are here and love your insight/perspective on Pagan/Jewish. I was born and raised Jewish, my Mother was also very Pagan in her ways. I went my own way a bit in my early teens but feel torn at times between the two but feel they go so well together also. Looking forward to more of your opinions on the subject.
Well, I haven't been here in a while all. Been spending my time on FB and that's only in the morning. Thins time of the year when the weather is nice I find it difficult to spend much time inside on the computer. I get up have coffee, morning meditation and am out the door running. Granted it's only in the garden and yard but I feel winter around the corner! Must spend all the time I can outside!
Hello - I've been reading along, but have some carpal tunnel issues and am not typing much these days.
Maia, I have to say, you look seriously hawt!
Have fun storming the castle, Clay!
Millie, I really want to
I am going to be outside in the garden a lot tomorrow. I have a week left of vacation and so much to do. First tomato ripened today!
My birthday is coming up soon. I am planning to spend the moment of my solar return (the exact moment I was born) in meditation on what I want to achieve in myself this year. I've been doing well in the diet and exercise front, but frankly feel I need to be more engaged and committed in some (most) other areas of my life.