My 5 year old still does NOT wish to go along with anything unless he knows he has to. Basically he and I are getting kicked out of our church because the Sunday school teacher can't handle him (or the other kids, but mine keeps trying to go out the classroom door). Unless I or his dad has eyes on him he thinks he'll get away with doing whatever he wants to, and won't respond to a nice request to co-operate if he doesn't feel like it. Some kids are eager to please by nature, I was. Some are so strictly disciplined they're afraid to step out of line, I've met those kids too. Some have come to think complexly enough they know it'll be best if they co-operate. I stop him and give him consequences for what he does (sneak something at the wrong time, doesn't get it when he would have; throw a fit or act wild in the wrong setting, has to sit til he chills out; fail to behave in class, has to practice behaving perfectly at home while doing worksheets and reading with me daily). I correct him with my mom voice and serious face and he straightens up. This teacher corrects him with a smile and friendly asking him to do something and he has no desire to do it. I figure it's just his personality and immaturity and he's only a tiny bit on the slow side of this development for his age. Wondering if that's right.
How unusual is this, at his age, to refuse to do as he's asked when it conflicts with his wishes and he feels like he has a choice? Like "please sit here and listen to the story" or "please wait to eat a cookie until after lunch." But not closely supervised or strongly corrected right away.
Also, if at 5 yours would act like this, how long before they moved past it and what prompted it?