Would you move if you knew the new neighbors were AWFUL? - Page 2

[Lovesong]

There is no guarantee that you would get better neighbours somewhere else. If nothing else, people move in and people move out. So, the perfect neighbours you've had for a year somewhere else might just be replaced my another couple from hell. There are no guarantees. Like right now, we are dealing with a woman who have NO respect whatsoever for our wishes. All she cares about is herself and her wishes. For instance, she hates lilacs...and the boundary between our gardens is a 50-year old lilac hedge (standing on OUR property). It was leaning against their garage a bit, built right at the border before we got the 4-metre rule in place here in Sweden. So, she asked if she could remove the bits touching their garage roof...

We said of course you might take some branches off that are disturbing you! She took that as the go-ahead for chopping down several of the trees, on our property, severely damaging the shape and look of the old hedge that has great value to us, because it is part of the original garden design. When we gently said, next time we met her "whoops, you took more of the lilac than we thought you would!" smiling sweetly, since we are anxious not to start a fight, she just shrugged and told us "so what, it is just lilac!" It isn't just lilac. It is 50-year old lilac trees, which is very different from most modern lilac hedges that are just bushes. And now, she wants to remove the old concrete pillar on our side of the drive (we regrettably share a drive). With no appreciation for the fact that it has a historic value, since it is built from concrete blocks once manufactured in our village and thus part of the village history. No, gone with everything that does not suit her and her idea of what is beautiful with no regard whatsoever for our sentiments. Really...grrr.

When we moved in ten years ago, the situation was very different. We had wonderful neighbours, whom helped us learn the ropes of using a furnace, and how to light a fireplace. In turn, we helped them set up their internet connection and things like that. Really good.

So, don't let a bad neighbour deter you. Just make sure to really properly mark out the property line so there can't be any fights about that. Oh, and please, even if it is tempting to, don't start retaliating in a thousand and one little ways. For instance, by planting quick growing, high trees to further block her light and view. That is just asking for trouble. Just be reasonable, be firm, and don't stoop to her level whatever you do, since that might give her legal reason to sue you.

[CrunchyJess]

Well, I work in the permits and code enforcement office of our city hall, and unfortunately I have seen first hand what ugly neighbors can do.  Truthfully though, from my side of things (the side the gets complained to), grouchy people can't LEGALLY do anything about you building and blocking their view.  It always surprises me when people get upset that the empty lots in their subdivision are being built on.  I mean, its a subdivision. Those lots are for sale for the sole purpose of being developed, not to provide exsisting houses with greenspace and nice views.  They knew that when they bought their place.

Haha, this is funny.  I'm at work right now and one of the inspectors is on the phone. He literally just said "Well, here's the point. We aren't going to retaliate against one neighbor just because another neighbor has a grudge or hard feelings towards them"

So there you go.  It might not be pleasant to live next to people who don't like you, but I personally would not let that deter me,

[Dandelionkid]

Thanks for all the replies. It really is helpful to know that most of you would still move. We are pretty certain about moving also and the bonus in the craziness is that I have no desire to please them anymore. I don't have retaliation in mind but the willingness to give a little to their wishes is completely gone. Apparently they admitted to a mutual acquaintance that they realized they crossed a line by recording our conversation. Hopefully that little bit of enlightenment means that they are not completely insane. Regardless, I feel a lot more peaceful about things :)

[babygirlie]

meh

[babygirlie]

After the Bush/terrorism issues it's legal to record phone calls. You hear them all the time now.

[Dandelionkid]

Originally Posted by babygirlie 

After the Bush/terrorism issues it's legal to record phone calls. You hear them all the time now.

Yup- it's totally legal (they just can't use it in the court of law). I don't care much about legality though. In this context (supposed friendly neighborly chat), secretly recording our face-to-face conversation was just plain sneaky and aggressive. 

[Dandelionkid]

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Edited by Dandelionkid - 4/13/12 at 1:14pm