Co-sleeping! - Page 2

[Azadehhast]

Originally Posted by Czarena 

I have a queen, king and twin covering my room from wall to wall. 8yo, 2yo, 1yo, hubs and me. We are just scooting everyone over a bit to make a safe zone for the newb between myself and hubby. None of mine have ever slept in a crib, though I did I as I thought I should and had one for my first.

This sounds lovely, and it's probably what we'll end up with. We've got two full size mattresses, stacked on top of one another now, but eventually we'll spread them out and have lots more room.

Any problems with getting all the little ones to sleep with this set up and differing bed times? Any special difficulties caused by everyone being in one room, something I should look out for?

[wendizbaby]

We'll co-sleep and I'm debating selling the crib I have for this babe because it is taking up so much room.  I have a double bed in the baby's room that will get used the most.  I honestly don't understand how mom's get up to feed throughout the night when you can just turn and stick it in your baby's mouth right next to you.  :)  I am such a lazy nighttime parenter.  

[insidevoice]

Originally Posted by Azadehhast 

This sounds lovely, and it's probably what we'll end up with. We've got two full size mattresses, stacked on top of one another now, but eventually we'll spread them out and have lots more room.

Any problems with getting all the little ones to sleep with this set up and differing bed times? Any special difficulties caused by everyone being in one room, something I should look out for?

This is largely how things go in our house right now, though my nine year old sleeps  on  twin on one side of the room while the 3 yr old, 2yr old and I share the king. 

Bedtime has largely been pushed back too late for the little guys lately because they got off their schedule when the days got long, so we have all been going to bed at about the same time. (Bad Mommy!  Bad!) We curl up, and I read a couple chapters in a book  then we all go to sleep. 

I can't manage separate bedtimes with this setup lately though they HAD been on a great schedule until about June with one sleeping in the bedroom at about seven and the youngest in the PnP in the kitchen at about the same time.  Both little guys have also taken to sleeping ON me and really squished against me which, while cute with a tiny baby, is LESS cute when they are big and the kicks are painful. 

I would LOVE this setup if my kids actually slept without me having to be in the room physically attached to them.  I actually find that I've enjoyed DD having snuck in and staying there most nights though she's been in her own room for years. 

The only real downside to this (for me) is that I feel like I have absolutely no downtime to myself and no kid free space.  It's kind of making me crazy.  I want to be able to get up before the kids in the morning to get things started, but they are up as soon as I move.  I like the arrangement for sleeping space and having them nearby, but it takes a toll on me as a person.

[SierraBella]

Originally Posted by wendizbaby 

We'll co-sleep and I'm debating selling the crib I have for this babe because it is taking up so much room.  I have a double bed in the baby's room that will get used the most.  I honestly don't understand how mom's get up to feed throughout the night when you can just turn and stick it in your baby's mouth right next to you.  :)  I am such a lazy nighttime parenter.  

Me too. I hate waking up and getting out of bed in the middle of the night! My older 2 still wake up in the middle of the night at times and I really, really don't like it! It is so much easier when you can just put the boob in its mouth and go back to sleep!

My older 2 co-slept, and started sleeping in their own beds around 18 months. They both will, still, wake up in the middle of the night on occasion, and sometimes they will come into my room, but its pretty rare for the most part any more.

[wendizbaby]

Funny thing....I kicked my 5 yr old out of our bed a few months ago because I was afraid he would kick me in the stomach. However, my husband went with him (he LOVES cuddling with our son), so now I've had a king-sized bed all to myself!! :) I'm enjoying it while I can.....

[Czarena]

Originally Posted by Azadehhast 

This sounds lovely, and it's probably what we'll end up with. We've got two full size mattresses, stacked on top of one another now, but eventually we'll spread them out and have lots more room.

Any problems with getting all the little ones to sleep with this set up and differing bed times? Any special difficulties caused by everyone being in one room, something I should look out for?

The two toddlers go to sleep about the same time and the 8yo knows to be extra quiet coming in
 

[AveryLamb]

My question for those who co-sleep for years and stuff...umm, like, when do you have any time with your husband??

[futuremamaheather]

Obviously this is my first so I don't have first hand experience, but the answer that more experienced parents (of several kiddos ) have given me is that they are creative with finding space to spend time together. If the kid(s) are in the bed, then perhaps they have their together time on the couch, in the shower, in the kitchen... ummmm... etc.
 

Originally Posted by AveryLamb 

My question for those who co-sleep for years and stuff...umm, like, when do you have any time with your husband??

[insidevoice]

Originally Posted by Czarena 

The two toddlers go to sleep about the same time and the 8yo knows to be extra quiet coming in
 

I HAVE to know how you manage to get them to sleep.  Mine are in a sleep-free phase and it's driving me nuts.  I curled up last night reading to them and they were absolutely frantic.

[insidevoice]

Originally Posted by AveryLamb 

My question for those who co-sleep for years and stuff...umm, like, when do you have any time with your husband??

Um, I guess you don't relegate yourself to the bedroom. At least we didn't.  However, this is LESS DOABLE when there is a much older child in the home.  

This is also why we plan to have a designated guest bedroom... 

[wendizbaby]

Originally Posted by AveryLamb 

My question for those who co-sleep for years and stuff...umm, like, when do you have any time with your husband??

We have a guest bedroom or a closet.  That was my dh's favorite time...when my ds was under 1 and we dtd in different locations around the house.  :)  When my ds was about 1 (or maybe even sooner then that), we put him to bed in his own bedroom and then brought him in to ours when we went to bed.  I actually find it much more difficult now that he's older because he'll wake from his bed and come looking for us.  If our bedroom door is locked he flips out because he's not used to that.  

[primipara]

Thanks for all this info, it is super helpful to hear how different families are tackling this co-sleeping thing.

We are expecting our first and live in a wonderful 1 bedroom apartment, which we love and bought last year. So the stakes are a bit high because how well cosleeping works out, will more or less determine how long we can stay in our place. We received an Arm's Reach co-sleeper for free and are thinking about getting a Pack&Play as well although I'm not sure if we'll use it. 

The family we got it from, said they used the co-sleeper for 6 months; after that, if we're well rested enough and want to continue this co-sleeping thing, I'm thinking about putting our mattress on the floor and maybe getting another small mattress to go alongside it. 

[LilMomma83]

We have always had a crib. With DS1 we NEVER used the crib! He slep in a pack n play for naps by himself, and the rest of the time we bed shared. When he was like 18mos I tried to sleep him in the crib and he climbed out so we got a toddler bed and he would occasionally sleep there and mostly sleep with us until a month or two ago...he's 4 1/2.

DS2 is NOT a bed sharer...from infancy he has just not been able to relax if anyone is touching him or his blanekts or anything...he likes his space as well as his quietness and darkness! So he (by his choice) has always slept in his room in his own bed (crib until 11mos when he tried to climb out and toddler bed since). Just within the ast week or two he has fallen asleep in my bed with me once or twice while he was sick...but, he just does not like bed sharing lol.

We used to carry our sleeping DS1 to his room or just put him on a blanket on the floor when he was younger for our special time.

My SIL is giving us a crib (we gave ours away after DS2 tried to climb out) and I also bought a bassenet that sits flat on the floor for $10 used, so we are just going to do whatever feels right when it coems to sleeping arrangements...in fact we are hopefully moving soon so I am not even sure on the bedroom arrangements...DS1 wants his own room and the little ones to share, I was thinking boys share and baby have her own...or maybe baby will share with us, boys will share, and the other will be for something/someone else... I really do hope baby girl wants to sleep with us though A) so I can nurse in my sleep haha, and B) so she can hopefully reverse cycle with nursing and keep my milk supply up when I go back to work.

I guess we will see what her personality is!

[BennyPai]

We're cosleepers - I've never stumbled around in the night looking for a hungry/wet newborn.  We keep the diaper supplies and breast pads bedside, LOL.   We were gifted a crib during my first pregnancy, and it mainly ended up holding laundry for the first 22 months, but that is when dd2 was born.  Then it turned into a sidecar for the toddler to make room for the newborn. 

 Our kiddos have mostly moved on to their own space now, though.  Our older daughters (7.5 & 5) mostly sleep in their own beds now, but sometimes one or both of them join us early in the AM.  Lately, 2yo dd has been choosing to sleep with 5yo dd and that is great.  Our bed is getting more cramped the bigger I get.

The new babe will probably be in our bed for the first year. We'll just let the babe lead the way.  I have my eye on a Moses basket for naps.  I like the portability.

This is one of those choices that is very individual - what works for one family/child may or may not work for another. 

[Ruthiegirl]

We have always co-slept and it continues to work beautifully.  My kids have always been good sleepers, must be the genetics since I love to sleep.  

We have a king sized mattress on the floor.  The 10 and 8 year olds have their own rooms and beds now and the 3 year old is transitioning from our bed to his big boy bed that is in our room.  Some day, when I have the time and energy, I am going to go buy bunk beds and the boys will eventually share a room.  

As for time with dh, this is our 4th pregnancy, so clearly we are finding time to be intimate.  My cousin has 8 kids and when asked about her sex life will admit freely that she and her dh have stretches where they dtd every day.  Other times, it is much less.  Married with kids does not mean an end to a good sex life.  

[Czarena]

Originally Posted by insidevoice 

I HAVE to know how you manage to get them to sleep.  Mine are in a sleep-free phase and it's driving me nuts.  I curled up last night reading to them and they were absolutely frantic.

1. I don't try to put them to bed until they are tired. Doesn't matter what time it is. However -  I have discovered that they want to sleep about 3 hours after they are done eating dinner. So I pushed dinner earlier to try to get myself some clean up time after they were asleep. Melatonin is also helpful to help get non-infants sleep schedules into a rhythm.

The 2 year old loves to watch a movie when he starts getting sleepy. Every night about 2 hours after dinner he gets grumpy and I ask if he wants his vitamin and a movie. (He loves Vit C, it's just become part of our thing) The 1 year old will cuddle and watch with us for a bit until he gets cranky and I ask him if he wants to go night night with  daddy. Daddy scoops him up and they have a ritual that he gets a drink from his sippy cup, gets his paci and turns out the light himself. Then he'll cuddle up on daddys chest while they walk a few minutes and is out in a few minutes. Daddy lays him on the bed and the 2year old is asleep pretty soon after that and gets moved to the bed.
 

Trying to notice their rhythm and using it along with melatonin to help get a good schedule going, and rituals are my best advice.  I'm against "bed times" but rituals are good. And sometimes two kids need different rituals, just gotta play with it and see what works. And the melatonin is only temporary to help their bodies, some people use it long term, but I don't

[insidevoice]

Originally Posted by Czarena 

1. I don't try to put them to bed until they are tired. Doesn't matter what time it is. However -  I have discovered that they want to sleep about 3 hours after they are done eating dinner. So I pushed dinner earlier to try to get myself some clean up time after they were asleep. Melatonin is also helpful to help get non-infants sleep schedules into a rhythm.

The 2 year old loves to watch a movie when he starts getting sleepy. Every night about 2 hours after dinner he gets grumpy and I ask if he wants his vitamin and a movie. (He loves Vit C, it's just become part of our thing) The 1 year old will cuddle and watch with us for a bit until he gets cranky and I ask him if he wants to go night night with  daddy. Daddy scoops him up and they have a ritual that he gets a drink from his sippy cup, gets his paci and turns out the light himself. Then he'll cuddle up on daddys chest while they walk a few minutes and is out in a few minutes. Daddy lays him on the bed and the 2year old is asleep pretty soon after that and gets moved to the bed.
 

Trying to notice their rhythm and using it along with melatonin to help get a good schedule going, and rituals are my best advice.  I'm against "bed times" but rituals are good. And sometimes two kids need different rituals, just gotta play with it and see what works. And the melatonin is only temporary to help their bodies, some people use it long term, but I don't

I've been going back and forth with the idea of melatonin to help my little guys reset their clocks.  I've  used it with my oldest for years (well for a few days at a time here or there since she was about 4.)  I also don't like to use it on an ongoing basis, but I find that 3 days to a week of use worked wonders when her sleep cycles got wonky. We also tend to go with a rhythm rather than times on a clock, but the boys are SO off right now I'm just overwhelmed. 

I think we'll start back with trying to move things a little earlier.   And I'll see about melatonin.  One will take it easily, the other will be a battle, but if I can sneak it in it would probably be a big help for him. 

[APToddlerMama]

Originally Posted by insidevoice 

I've been going back and forth with the idea of melatonin to help my little guys reset their clocks.  I've  used it with my oldest for years (well for a few days at a time here or there since she was about 4.)  I also don't like to use it on an ongoing basis, but I find that 3 days to a week of use worked wonders when her sleep cycles got wonky. We also tend to go with a rhythm rather than times on a clock, but the boys are SO off right now I'm just overwhelmed. 

I think we'll start back with trying to move things a little earlier.   And I'll see about melatonin.  One will take it easily, the other will be a battle, but if I can sneak it in it would probably be a big help for him. 

The first time we gave my son melatonin (at the suggestion of his neurologist), he puked and acted all weird and I got freaked out, so we tried giving him teeny tiny little doses and were really shocked that it worked.  Even though he is a big guy, 1/10th of a mg/ml gets him to sleep.  You might want to try a little dose and see what happens. 
 

[insidevoice]

We use the 300 mcg doses with my oldest.  The large doses leave her slightly foggy the next day (not sleepy, but she wanders off to daydream land easily to begin with)  tiny doses seem to be enough to help her sleep without leaving her head in the clouds for a week. 

[APToddlerMama]

Thats probably about the same as we use with my son if we were to do it by weight.  It at least makes me feel less guilty when I do choose to use it.  Luckily now that we're done with naps I rely on it much less.