Yes! We're working very hard with dd right now on the how to do it. Getting enough sleep and positive attention are part of it, but it's not the whole story. It's hard.
Natural and Logical Consequences for disrespect - Page 2
I don't know how old this thread is; just came across it. Was your son perhaps born prematurely? My neice is 16 and has had rage control problems since she was a toddler. She was born several weeks early and was in the hospital for weeks after birth to help her lungs develop, etc.
I don't remember the exact description of the condition, but one doc suggested that some premie kiddos' underdeveloped nervous systems can translate into rage control issues as they get older. Don't know what the solutions were, but it mght be something to ask a doc about in case there is actually a medical issue involved. Might give you peace of mind to at least understand the "why."