Does your 8 year old.....? - Page 3

[Evan&Anna's_Mom]

My 8 YO DD will get her own snacks, including things that need toasting or microwaving.  Both she and 11 you DS generally are "free snacking" during the day and don't even ask for food help.  She can certainly get out her own ice cream (her favorite snack)!  She can use the stove and oven with supervision.

On a regular basis she gets herself ready for bed with multiple reminders/checklist (she has ADHD and by bedtime her meds have worn off and she can't remember from one minute to the next what she's supposed to be doing).  We still read to both kids before bed and DD still likes to snuggle until almost asleep.  However, she went to sleep away camp for the first time this summer and was completely "bed time" independent!

She walks to friends in the neighborhood (about a block) now and will start walking 5 blocks home from school tomorrow.  Well, I'll probably go and walk with her tomorrow but after that I expect her to do it on her own.

Clean up without being asked?  There are kids that do that?  Where do I get one????   Seriously, this child will trip over things for weeks without picking them up.  She cannot/will not remember to put her food trash in the garbage and her dirty dishes near the sink.  Its probably my biggest pet peeve with her at the moment.

[Storm Bride]

DD1 turned 8 in May.

Get food for themselves.  Use stove or toaster?

Yes. DD1 can use the toaster, and also gets many of her own meals. I supervise some things (chopping celery, scooping Miracle Whip) to make sure she doesn't make a huge mess or use too much of something. She also gets breakfast for dd2 sometimes. Her skills are basically up to making a tuna salad sandwich, complete with chopped celery and onion (although she frequently asks me to cut the onion, as she only likes it very finely chopped, and she isn't quite up to that yet).

Put themselves to bed?

Hmmm...dh usually puts the kids to bed, then I go in an do goodnights after that (including reading or singing or whatever). But, dd1 certainly can put herself to bed. She takes her own shower, brushes her own teeth, brushes her own hair (grudgingly!), etc.

clean up after self without being asked?

No. DD1 is fairly hopeless at this stuff. She's amazingly orderly when the cleaning bug hits her, and can clear up the living room or her bedroom quite quickly. She enjoys straightening the family's shoes and things like that. But, she's the type of kid who will take off a hoodie and drop it where she is, without thinking about it. We make her pick it up and put it in the hamper or hang it up or whatever, but she keeps doing it.

Walk themselves somewhere (name number of blocks

She could, but she doesn't. Her friends are all in our townhouse complex, and most other places that she goes are farther away than we're comfortable letting her walk on her own. I'd probably let her walk to the closest grocery store (about 15 miinutes away - not sure how many blocks it would be), except that the last street she'd have to cross is an intersection where people do stupid things. She's shown no interest in it yet, anyway.

[seriosa]

8 1/2  yr old boy

Get food for themselves. Use stove or toaster?

He will get cold snacks for himself, can use knives (slice bread or fruit etc). We don't have a toaster or microwave. I don't let him use the stove - the stove top is about shoulder level to him, not safe.

Put themselves to bed?

No way. He needs to be directed step by step, and then when finally under the covers its cuddles for 10-20 mins from both DH & I. He loves his bedtime cuddles.

clean up after self without being asked?

Routine things, most time he needs "reminding". He needs to clear up after snacking, take care of his clothes (placed on chair after undressing if reusable or in the hamper if not), organise his schoolwork, put away his playthings, make his bed in the mornings etc. He does a lot, but needs prompting 9 times out of 10. Paradoxically, exceptional stuff (big spills, break something) he will take a broom or a mop and clean up spontaneously.

Walk themselves somewhere (name number of blocks).

He will start walking himself to school with two other same-age neighbour kids this autumn (10 min walk). He has been asking for a while to walk places in the neighbourhood alone, but I haven't yet let him.

[insidevoice]

DD is nine turning 10, she's doing a little more every few months, but as for when she was 8... 

Originally Posted by kathymuggle 

Get food for themselves.  Use stove or toaster?

Yes, she gets food for herself.  She also makes snacks for the toddlers if she's making something for herself.  Stove- only with direct supervision, toaster- yes, microwave- yes. 

Put themselves to bed?

Yep. 

clean up after self without being asked?

Um, not so much.  She really needs a lot of poking and prodding to follow through with clean up, even now. 

Walk themselves somewhere (name number of blocks).

Very small town, she may go a few blocks.  However, her grandparent's house is right near 'town' and halfway to the park, so she has a little extra support and knows she can stop in there whenever she wants.  

I know I have babied my youngest.  I would like to encourage a bit more independance - but I forget (lame!  I have 3 kids!) what 8 year olds are capable of.

I would prefer it if only people who have or have had 8 yr olds respond.  If you have 6 yr old who does one of the above - that is cool too. 

TIA!

Kathy

[Tonia Starr]

Originally Posted by kathymuggle 

Get food for themselves.  Use stove or toaster?

Yes. My son is 8 and actually aspires to a career as a chef one day. The kid has been whipping up killer recipes since age 5! Im talking from scratch, made up in his own head stir fries and casseroles with chopping and dicing and all that. Blows me away. :) Pretty sure thats not the norm though. My 10 yr old can only make sandwiches and toast. :)

Put themselves to bed?

Yes. Again, very independent ansd self reliant. I wish his older brother and younger brothers were as easy to get to d the expected thinsg without cnstant reminders,

clean up after self without being asked?

Yes. He is very into orghanization and tidiness. He likes his area to be neat.

Walk themselves somewhere (name number of blocks).  

I allow him to go to friends homes and stay within one block without me as long as he is within earshot. If I call him and he doesnt come running he has to come hme and stay inside the next day. I know all our neighbors but am still fairly protective cuz you just never know....

I know I have babied my youngest.  I would like to encourage a bit more independance - but I forget (lame!  I have 3 kids!) what 8 year olds are capable of.

I would prefer it if only people who have or have had 8 yr olds respond.  If you have 6 yr old who does one of the above - that is cool too. 

TIA!

Kathy

[AbbieB]

Originally Posted by kathymuggle 

Get food for themselves.  Use stove or toaster?

Oh goodness yes. DD makes scrambled eggs, toast, sandwiches, mac and cheese, pours drinks, makes salads, cuts up fruit, cuts up cheese, etc... She is good to go on the toaster and microwave, I keep a loose eye on her with the stove. She has made cookies from start to finish with me managing, but not doing. She helps me to cook often.

Put themselves to bed?

I wish. She's getting better at it. She just moved from the family bed to a twin, pushed right up next to me. She likes to have an adult in the room when she goes to sleep.

clean up after self without being asked?

Depends. My first reaction to this question was to snicker. She is not very mindful these days. She does go on a cleaning jag once a week and do things like dust, make the beds, sort laundry, vacuum, do some dishes. But it's random. She is pretty particular about her desk/dressing table and keeps it neat most of the time. Other times it is a jumble of Lego's, construction paper, and hair accessories.

Walk themselves somewhere (name number of blocks).  

She is allowed to go up and down our street. There isn't anything to walk to. She has to check in with me before leaving the yard. In a store she like target she is allowed to hang in the Barbie aisle while I browse a few aisles over. At IKEA I will sit in the cafe with her younger brother while she goes and gets an ice cream cone. At Busch Gardens she is allowed to go get in line and ride a ride while I sit on a shady bench with her brother or take him to the kiddy ride in that area. At the beach she can head down to the sand by the water or back up to the shower area while I am wrangling her brother. I've been publicly chewed out for this by a stranger (kidnappers don't you know.) At the aquarium or zoo she is allowed to run up ahead to another out of sight exhibit.

I know I have babied my youngest.  I would like to encourage a bit more Independence - but I forget (lame!  I have 3 kids!) what 8 year olds are capable of.

I would prefer it if only people who have or have had 8 yr olds respond.  If you have 6 yr old who does one of the above - that is cool too. 

DD will be 8 in October.

TIA!

Kathy

[hermionesmum]

dd1 is 9 1/2, dd2 turns 8 next week. They both fix their own breakfasts, including using the toaster. The eldest has progressed to cooking boiled eggs, pasta, and making hot chocolate in the microwave. She also makes sandwiches at sunday lunchtimes for the family while I clean up after sunday school.

They both get ready for bed independently, although I do start running bath water, they turn it off! One they are ready for bed I still go up and say goodnight, sometimes still read to dd2, although they both generally prefer to read independently, now.

The eldest wanders happily around our small town on Saturday mornings, runs errands, meets friends in the park and at the local cafe for a milkshake. She has done for over a year now. I'll let the younger one go along with her, but not independently yet, she's a slightly flakier personality.

[Callimom]

Originally Posted by kathymuggle 

My youngest just turned 8 a couple of weeks ago - I'm basing my answers on her but all of her siblings have been about the same at this age.

Get food for themselves.  Use stove or toaster?

Yes to all. Simple things on the stove like eggs, grill cheese, soup, pasta - that sort of thing if I am not directly supervising.

Put themselves to bed?

Yes but she shares a room with an older sister which helps. I tuck in after the fact.

clean up after self without being asked?

umm - lol - I guess although it is usually with being asked first. It depends on what it is. She's usually pretty good about doing her chores without reminding.

Walk themselves somewhere (name number of blocks).  

We just moved and so I am less likely to let her wander too far without siblings until we get the lay of the land. When she was 7 and we lived in our old house she could roam 5 or 6 residential blocks with her siblings who were 9 at the time. I tend to prefer my kids travel in pairs in general. 

[zinemama]

My 8yo does all those things.

(By "put themself to bed" I'm assuming you mean that after a story is read and the light is turned out, the child goes to sleep without more parental involvment for the night.)

[kathymuggle]

By put self to bed I meant minimum involvement from parents in the process (other than a reminder of the time).  I see almost no 8 yr olds put themselves to bed.

[Imakcerka]

Yeah, I think the day my 8 yr old doesn't want a story and a back rub I'll die a little inside. I know that sounds pathetic, but I totally need that. So I hope it doesn't happen til maybe 12? Is that sad of me? Maybe it is.

[kathymuggle]

Originally Posted by Imakcerka 

Yeah, I think the day my 8 yr old doesn't want a story and a back rub I'll die a little inside. I know that sounds pathetic, but I totally need that. So I hope it doesn't happen til maybe 12? Is that sad of me? Maybe it is.

No, it sounds sweet.  I am so tired by the time DD goes to bed that i want her to put herself to bed  but maybe I need to work on recharging my batteries in the evening so I can put her to bed happily.

I have been working on her getting her own food with some success.  

I am game with her walking a block or two, but she has no interest in it, so that is where we are at with that.

As per cleaning up after herself - it seems to be a work in progress - not only for her, but everyone in our family, lol.  i have ramped up the expectation slightly though.

[Evan&Anna's_Mom]

Originally Posted by Imakcerka 

Yeah, I think the day my 8 yr old doesn't want a story and a back rub I'll die a little inside. I know that sounds pathetic, but I totally need that. So I hope it doesn't happen til maybe 12? Is that sad of me? Maybe it is.

If it helps, my 11 YO (OMG -- 12 next week!!!) who just started middle school still likes me to read and snuggle in to talk before he goes to sleep.  And he wants a kiss before he leaves for school, even though he is now old enough to ride his bike to school on his own.  So maybe you will get to 12 too!

[*bejeweled*]

Uhhhm, this is adorable!

Quote Childsplay: Yes. He'll walk himself to sailing school (1/2 mile or so) and walk halfway across town to go fishing or 'clear his head' as he says. - he's kind of like an old man

[Storm Bride]

Originally Posted by Imakcerka 

Yeah, I think the day my 8 yr old doesn't want a story and a back rub I'll die a little inside. I know that sounds pathetic, but I totally need that. So I hope it doesn't happen til maybe 12? Is that sad of me? Maybe it is.

I think it's pretty normal. When ds1 (now 18 - so many changes in the last few years!) turned 12, we were a few months away from moving. He and I used to have this long, drawn-out bedtime ritual (three distinct sequences of rhymes/salutations - think "good night, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite" type thing - multiple songs, and a set series of hugs and kisses). DS1 announced that he was 12 now, and didn't need me to "put him to bed" anymore. (I didn't, really - just diid the good nights.) But, he also decided that he'd keep doing them until we moved into our new place. So, the first night in our new place, we just said "goodnight" and gave each other a hug and a kiss before he went to bed. It felt sooooo weird, and I was a bit sad, even though I had dd1 (then two) and ds2 (then 10 days) to occupy me. I knew he was going to grow up, but some of the steps along the way were harder than others.

[phathui5]

Get food for themselves. Use stove or toaster? Yes, my eight year old can fix herself something to eat. She uses the microwave and toaster but not the stove.

Put themselves to bed? Yes.

clean up after self without being asked? No.

Walk themselves somewhere (name number of blocks). Yes, 2-3 blocks.

[leighi123]

My ds turned 4 in July and does all of those things.   

The farthest he walks alone is to the neighbor's house though, its I think 6 houses down in our gated community, and he doesn't have to cross the road.