Our kitty Calliope is 8.5 years old and we're having major issues. My girlfriend Kristie found her abandoned as a kitten in a box in a dumpster with 3 of her brothers and sisters. We gladly accepted her into our home and tried to be the best kitty parents we could be, but she unfortunately has not had an easy life, even living with two people that love her very much. Our roommates boyfriend accidentally spilled boiling water on himself and on Calliope when she was a couple months old. He didn't tell us until a couple of days later when we found scabs on her back. We took her to the vet but they said there was nothing that we could do at that point because she had scabbed up already. She's mainly been an indoor cat her entire life, but we would let her out in our front yard, supervised for 20-30 minutes at a time....until....one night she ate too much grass and started to vomit. But the vomit was too thick because of the undigested grass, so she started to choke. I was in bed and Kristie was in the bathroom and heard a noise - she started screaming. Calliope ripped off a part of her tongue using her claw to pull the grass vomit out of her mouth. We rushed her to the emerency vet and they removed the flap that she created. This happened when she was about 4 years old.
Since that point in time, she's been horribly nasty to any human or animal other than me. She'll jump up on my belly and want to be petted, and purr. But if Kristie even talks to her, she hisses at her and runs away. Same for any other guest the comes over - she's constantly growling, hissing, trying to bite and swatting at everybody. She's also overweight, even though we've been feeding her 1/4 cup of weight management food since she was 3. Recently, she had a bout with diarrhea, and she can't clean herself because of her weight. We took her to the vet, who recommended an all protein food and a 1 week course of oral liquid antibiotics for collitis. It was a nightmare trying to give her the medicine, but we managed to do it wearing fireplace gloves. The all protein food has been causing her to have anal leakage and we've been constantly having to clean her rear, our couches, our bed, etc. We decided to move her back to the weight management food - which seems to have stopped the anal leakage, but her regular BMs still get stuck to her rear and we have to clean her with a wash cloth. She can't stand it, but we can't have cat poop all over the house.
Overall, she just seems like such an unhappy cat. We don't want to let her outside - not only for her safety, but so she won't attack our neighbor's outdoor pets. She has aggresively attacked my friends very docile pit bull when he had brought him over for a visit. That taught us that we really can't have anybody visit with a dog or cat. (There were a couple of other occasions where she attacked, but this was the third time and the last straw) We're at our wits end and we don't know what to do. We've tried Rescue Remedy, Plug-ins the vet gave us, tranquilizers the vet gave us. They seem to suggest that we might want to consider putting her to sleep since she's so hostile towards people - they have to give her anasthetia for a routine visit. I've tried to see if there is a place that might rescue problem cats, but I'm not having much luck. I would love some ideas - I really don't want to put her down at such an early age, but at the same time, I don't think it would be right to try to find another home for her when she is so mean and vicious. Any advice is appreciated.