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How are people reacting to the news? - Page 3

post #41 of 63

I told my mom last night! She was shocked I'm so far along, but when I explained that first she was gone for two weeks and then it was right before SIL's wedding, she understood. We started talking about dates, and I said we couldn't go skiing this year (annual family vacation), and she probably wouldn't either, she said "well, it's a bit early to be planning like that." I don't fault her for it, as she had 5- and 8-week miscarriages, but I told her we're just going to talk and plan like this one is sticking. She said okay. For the rest of the night she hugged me and told me congratulations each time we were standing up. It was cute. My dad told DH congrats. At some point he said "this is getting really syrupy" when we talked about my aunts' grandbaby biological clocks. It was funny. My dad shows his love in actions, not so much in words, so this was fine.

 

All in all, that went well. I'm happy that's over. Now on to telling MIL and FIL next weekend, and we'll be done with the major announcements. This morning I woke up and it felt more real. 

post #42 of 63

 

Quote:

 Like pp, there hasn't been a lot of excitement since #4.

simplified- I have done some reading on different moms of many boards, and they agree that after #7, people don't really say much and leave them be, so maybe you'll be in the clear this time!

 

We have not told yet. My sister is getting married on Saturday, so we are waiting until after that. My mom knows, but she guessed and I told her we aren't talking about it til after the wedding. That is going well. I have really been looking forward to sharing the news, but now that I think I could tell next week (after the wedding) I'm not sure I want to. I like having a secret. However, I do want to tell the kids, and that means telling the world, so we'll have to see.

post #43 of 63
Quote:
Originally Posted by justKate View Post

OMG Christy, I wouldn't tell anyone when you go in to labor!  Have the baby and let DH call them the next morning.  winky.gif



I think this is the plan, lol.  I don't want all the IL's coming over, and I don't want Mom calling every 15 minutes to see what's going on.

 

SIL did this w/ her 2nd DC, she only called her mom, who was her "coach" and had her DD @ hospital w/o 30 people in the hallway listening @ the door, or walking in and out while she was in labor.  It was probably an hour or 2 after she was born that BIL called us.  Oh, and her friend who was going to be keeping her son while she was in the hospital knew, obviously, but didn't say anything.

 

post #44 of 63

Wow!  People really do have no tact.  You ladies with big families can be a part of my family.  We love big families and my mom is all about lots of babies.

 

We haven't told anyone yet.  I told DH I want to wait until after my first MW appt which is the end of Sept.  But we sold our house in Dec. and moved in with my parents to help with my sick dad so keeping it a secret is a little harder than usual.  My sister is due in Dec. and told us after the first trimester, which is what she did for her last two too, but it's easier for to hide it, she just avoided us all for that time!  I haven't gotten any MS yet but I don't get it until later so I'm thinking next week (which we'll be in vacation for) and luckily I only get it for a very short time.  I just have to keep coming up with viable reasons to not drink!  LOL!  So far it's been I have a headache, which is true! 

 

We bought DS a shirt that says "I'm going to be a Big Brother"  and wanted to use that to announce so hopefully we get to use it.  It's been killing me to not tell as only like 5 people this weekend alone asked me when we're having another one.  LOL!  Um, 7 to 8 months from now!

post #45 of 63

I'll have to come up with some reasons for why I'm not drinking when we go down to the in-law's for BIL's wedding weekend after next.  I usually drink a lot of wine when I'm there shy.gif so it'll be odd when I don't this time.  I usually get migraines (not wine related lol.gif ) and am typically on quite a few meds and neither affects me drinking wine, so those stand-by excuses might not fly. 

post #46 of 63

i blamed acid reflux recently.  I said it was really painful and explained that alcohol would not help.  It's going to be hard at a wedding though!  from my experience, people take no excuses for not drinking at weddings!  good luck!

post #47 of 63

Yeah I am really lucky on that front since everyone already knows I don't drink. So I never have to worry about excuses.

post #48 of 63

Wow, some of the responses you all have gotten are pretty awful.

 

We're not expecting great responses since this will be our 3rd and our oldest will have just turned 3 a few days before this one gets here. But after the ugly reactions we got for DD (#2), we feel like just about anything else is an improvement. I was fresh into a divorce when DP and I started dating and had our oops. People seriously asked me "is it DP's?" or "Does DP know?" The latter all the way up until I quit work at 35 weeks. I'm pretty sure DP was the first person I told when I found out and that he's smart enough to notice his skinny girlfriend's bulging belly that late in the game! People were much, much worse to DP though. After DD was born, there were a few insisting he needed to get a paternity test and retain a lawyer because "you know how Emily is". Er, okay, and how does that go again? Because I missed the memo irked.gif.

 

From total strangers though, we're expecting more of the same from last time. DP and I have a 17 year gap and I've been mistaken for his daughter before (wonder who they think the babies belong to?). That stuff is usually hilarious though and we enjoy some of the weirdness.

post #49 of 63

Yeah, I'm sorry for all the bad reactions you all have gotten! Congratulations to each and every one of you. Sometimes I wish I could just live in a bubble and not have to deal with others' ugliness. I haven't told anyone besides my DP (obviously - he's probably sick of hearing too much about it at this point) and my sister (who told her husband). Baby was sort of unplanned, so we're still kind of ambivalent about it, but also very happy, just getting used to it. It'll be the first baby for both of us. I'm worried about telling my dad because we're not married (even though I'm 36!) and I know DP feels very nervous about telling his parents. But, at the end of the day, we're full grown adults, capable of making our own decisions; we support ourselves and will support this baby and love it. So, that said, good luck to all of you, and just try to shut out the rudeness from outsiders, and wish me luck telling my dad! Take care and H&H eight-ish months to you!

post #50 of 63

I was grocery shopping with my kids on Sunday and kept passing the same older couple in each aisle.  Once we got to the very last aisle the lady came up to me and said "I'm sure you already know this, but I just wanted to tell you that you have four very well-behaved children!"  For some reason, that comment alone made me feel so much better about #5 on the way, it just helped offset how my extended family reacts to our family size. 

 

In 20 years, when all my kids are out of the nest and I see a mom shopping with her brood of kids, I'm going to make sure to return the favor, because some times you never know how much a little comment like that is going to make someone's day.

post #51 of 63

So I got my first "You're nuts" of the pregnancy and I haven't even told my step-mother yet.  I didn't know what to say to that, so I just looked at her (a friend).  She said it like three times.  Seriously.irked.gif
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Red Sonja View Post
In 20 years, when all my kids are out of the nest and I see a mom shopping with her brood of kids, I'm going to make sure to return the favor, because some times you never know how much a little comment like that is going to make someone's day.


I agree.  And excellent way to encourage future mothers!

post #52 of 63
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom2SammyJoe View Post

 

simplified- I have done some reading on different moms of many boards, and they agree that after #7, people don't really say much and leave them be, so maybe you'll be in the clear this time!


But I want the excitement and the smiling faces looking back at me.  I love the joy surrounding birth and children and it's really sad that other people don't feel the same way.  Even if they don't say anything stupid, it's sad when they just leave you alone.  This baby is just as wonderful and full of fabulous as the first one, right?  Sure it was super new and cool with the first baby and the first grandson.  But I've never had 8 before, that'll be super new and cool in it's own right.

 

Okay, off the soapbox.  I suppose I'll go take my hormones to sleep now. ;)

post #53 of 63
Thread Starter 

My parents are in town, so this is the first time I am seeing them after the big announcement.

 

The kids and I went out to dinner with them (DH was working). DD could not stop talking about the new baby, she's so excited. My parents did not say a thing. I've never seen them avoid a topic so well. Bummer.

 

I didn't even get a congratulations hug when we first saw each other. I guess they are still upset. Oh well. They'll come around when there is a sweet baby to love on, if not before.

post #54 of 63

 

Quote:
This baby is just as wonderful and full of fabulous as the first one, right? Sure it was super new and cool with the first baby and the first grandson. But I've never had 8 before, that'll be super new and cool in it's own right.

Oh, honey, I do agree with you! Honestly, I'm afraid of the comments I'll get when I share we are expecting #3. People think we are done because we have a boy and a girl. Why is that the magic formula? I know my grandma with not be happy. I think she really resents that she had 5 children. Everytime I see her she asks me when I'm going to get my master's degree. Um, I stay home with my kids and don't want to go back to work. Another degree doesn't really seem that important to me right now.

I love to see big families out and about, doing their thing, loving their kids. It is an encouragement to me. We could very well be on our way there...

post #55 of 63

We haven't told ANYONE.  Not even our parents.  Waiting until the first prenatal appointment and ultrasound to see the heartbeat first.  Next week!  I wonder if any of my friends that I know in real life have been reading my posts on here!  If so, they haven't approached me yet to say congrats!

 

To the OP:  From one cancer mommy to another, please know that I'm thinking about you and your son.  Glad to read that he is doing well with chemo.  My daughter completed her chemo and surgery to remove her tumor last summer.  Keep your hope and positive attitude!

post #56 of 63

Quote:

Originally Posted by simplified View Post
This baby is just as wonderful and full of fabulous as the first one, right?  Sure it was super new and cool with the first baby and the first grandson.  But I've never had 8 before, that'll be super new and cool in it's own right.


I don't know, I think the first baby/first grandchild thing is scary.  IMO there should be less negativity and fear with each one.  And every baby is a new person that will change your whole family--that's the most special thing about it to me.  love.gif

 

post #57 of 63

AbbieB, I'm so sorry!  To not even acknowledge your daughter and her feelings is just wrong, let alone act like nothing is happening.  Well, I'm happy for you, and I hope everything goes well!!  blowkiss.gif

 

simplified, I feel the same way.  A baby is awesome, and the joy they bring is amazing, no matter where they fall in the scope of the size of the family.  Here's a happy face looking back @ you:  love.gif  Also, love the profile pic!  And you're not nuts, you're superwoman!  supermod.gif

 

 

 

post #58 of 63
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by mommy2bnc View Post

 

To the OP:  From one cancer mommy to another, please know that I'm thinking about you and your son.  Glad to read that he is doing well with chemo.  My daughter completed her chemo and surgery to remove her tumor last summer.  Keep your hope and positive attitude!



Thank you. <3

 

 

post #59 of 63
my dp is still freaking out. He didn't take the news well, but i reminded him that he has a choice.... to get on board or walj away. He is acting MUCH happier now. although i don't think he's excited. It's bad timing, but I feel like it's a blessing regardless of timing. I'm excited, but nervous. I had just come around to the idea of our family being complete. Guess I was wrong. Sending out love to all of you that are gettung negative comments. I say "CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!" to all of you!
post #60 of 63

I always see a baby as a blessing, so I'm wishing all you mamas who had negative responses a big huge CONGRATS!

 

I have to admit...the first few weeks after I found out, I was VERY stressed! We had been trying for quite a while...but there's a difference between trying, and it actually happening! I was very very (still am) scared. My DH has been up and down...one minute happy, the next minute terrified, but I think that's normal :)

We've told our parents, and I've told a few of my very close friends. The reaction has thankfully been overwhelmingly positive. We're going to wait until 12 weeks to tell the rest of our family and all of our friends and co-workers :)

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