My situation was a little different so I'm not sure if it will help or not. I went to the birth center in labor. I labored (actively) at home for about 7 hours and then went to the birth center when contractions were as close as 3 minutes apart. I labored there for another 13 hours but never got past 6 cm. I was transferred as a result of the midwife's recommendation. She felt that I was exhausted (which I was) and was concerned that I wouldn't have enough energy to push and would end up with a c-section. She suggested an epidural so i could sleep for a bit to give me some energy for pushing. So I transferred. My experience wasn't a good one, but I also was not prepared for having to be at the hospital and was very overwhelmed by it all and exhausted after 20 hours of labor and being awake for 31 hours at that point. I got the epidural which did help me to sleep and feel more rested. They also gave me pitocin (which I don't remember happening or them asking or anything) and of course the IV, monitor, and everything else. I started pushing and pushed for 3 1/2 hours before they finally used a vacuum. I found the nurses nice, but annoying. I would push when I had a contraction and they kept telling me, "wait until you have a contraction." I'd tell them that I was, and they'd look at the computer screen and say "no, you're not." quickly followed by "oh, I guess you are." I wanted to scream at them "I'm here! Look at me! I'm the one feeling this. Look away from that stupid monitor!" The OB was rude. No bedside manner. Not friendly. When I started to push, she told me, "you're going to have to do better than that if you want to have a baby here." I wanted to scream at her, "you see how hard you can push when you've been contracting for 26 hours!" She asked every hour I was pushing if we could do the vacuum. I kept telling her no, I wanted to try more. Finally, at the 3 1/2 hour mark, she asked again and I asked the midwife how much longer she thought I'd need to push to get the baby out. She said another hour. I knew I didn't have it in me so I decided on the vacuum.
I honestly don't remember the midwife having much of any role there at all. She stayed with me and when they took my ds away to measure him, weigh him, check him over, etc she told them (after I'd asked the nurses 3 times for him back), "I think she wants her baby back." Looking back, I feel that many things could have been done differently and I wish someone had asked me. My brain literally shuts down during labor - I am unable to answer basic questions and I certainly can't come up with any ideas on my own. So I couldn't think of any of this, but I wish my epidural had been turned off after I slept. Then I could have gotten up and felt the pushing and squatted or stood or something. I said several times while i was pushing, "I feel like I need to be upright. I feel like I need to sit up." and no one responded in any way to me. I feel like my midwife (and my doula for that matter) should have picked up on that and also should have asked me, "do you want the epidural in for pushing? Do you want pitocin?" The OB even cut the cord when ds was born, without asking either of us if we wanted to do it.
That said, it may be very different if it's planned to be at the hospital and the midwife is the one who is in charge. Once I transferred, it was clear that we were in the OB's territory. Plus, I think everyone was exhausted. We were all up all night, the labor was long, extremely painful (back labor, non-stop contractions the whole time), and I don't know that everyone was at their best by that point.
I don't know if any of that helps. Feel free to ask any more questions.
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