Oh, and Julie, as for WWYD, I guess if money is not a huge problem I would do IVF, given your age, because of the fact that even with perfect sperm it can take a while to conceive. But I don't know much about the surgery though - how good are the chances that his sperm will improve soon? However, if money was an issue, I guess I would give the natural TTC way a try for a while. However, I have baggage that comes with that advice, I am 37 and I regret waiting so long to TTC.
Fall IVF Thread: Let's hear it for the BFPs! - Page 16
April - I'm so sorry to come on here and read the news about your embries! So not fair. I'll be interested in hearing what your RE has to say about the whole thing. I'm so glad that you have your DD to hopefully try and brighten you day and i'm sure you appreciate her more and more every day. Keep us posted about how the adoption process is going and be sure to stick around b/c you would truly be missed if you left us all together.
Renavoo - hope your trip goes well and you get some good sleep. What is the time difference over there. Hope the jet lag isn't too bad.
Julie - that is a hard one. I probably agree with what rcr said about finances and all. I guess it would be a good question to ask DH's doctor today about the amount of improvement he thinks he will see after the surgery. I guess, if it were me and I had the finances, I'd probably do IVF again b/c didn't kewpie say that her DH had the same surgery and it didn't help that much and by doing the IVF you know the sperm is going to get to the egg and they will both for sure get back into your uterus, so you have kinda taken out the middle man especially if you are worried about your age. Sucks that you even have to be thinking about these things.
AFM - forgot if i told you all that I got my last package of meds from that girl so now i'm set!!! Yay!!!! Start Lupron on Thurs of this week. Still crampy for some reason... who knows.
julie, not sure what your ttc journey has entailed thus far... have you done IUIs, either natural unmedicated ones or with meds? Sounds like you have done IVF with ICSI in the past? I know that in our case, our thinking has been along the lines of three cycles of medicated (Clomid, unmonitored; $350 a pop), and then IVF if that fails. Like our RE had said, "No use killing a fly with a hammer when a flyswatter will do". We were very fortunate and blessed to have conceived our DS from Clomid/IUI #2. That was when I was a couple months away from turning 40. Now, 2 years later, it's IVF all the way... we can't afford to lose the time. And the success rate is so much lower for Clomid/IUI once you hit 40... Actually it all goes downhill, according to the 'stats', once you hit that age, with any fertility treatment *sigh* (But we are reminding ourselves those are just 'averages'...) If I was 35, I would feel so much better about the stats, although I certainly couldn't be complacent about things.... Agh. Perhaps you could give it some time to see if things happen naturally, or do IUI... and then once that time comes around, go for IVF, knowing that you gave it a shot? Or, if money isn't that much of an issue, and if you okay with not going the 'gentler on the body' route, then head straight for IVF? I guess something else that would factor in is how you would feel at the end of 6 months and you didn't get a bfp-- would you be okay with that time being gone? Another thing that would be important to rule out is if your own fertility status has changed much since the last time you had things checked... that might put things in perspective more, too. Good luck with deciding!
rcr, I just saw one of your last posts now, I guess we were posting at around the same time before and that's how I missed it. Anyway, I sure hope you get some answers as to why your eggs are behaving that way...
renavoo, what a whirlwind of a week! I'm exhausted just thinking about it!
Blue, YAY for getting the last of the meds! On you go!!!!
april, i'm sorry things ended up this way. but i'm glad you and your husband have made the decision to adopt. it must be liberating to know at least you are done with all of this anguish, and now can open your hearts and homes to a new child. i remember when you posted about adoption earlier, and i think that now you can have the best of both worlds.. a biological child and a child that really needs a loving home like yours. i hope you stick around with us and keep us posted on what happens.
blue- glad your meds came!
renavoo- hope your flight was easy!
afm- despite saying over and over again that i wouldn't POAS, i am of course doing it. i took one yesterday at work (terrible idea) and cried the entire day because it was a bfn at 7dp3dt. which i understand is too early. wound up sobbing through my acupuncture treatment, and cried all night. my husband got mad at me because i said i wasn't going to test, and he is always an optimist and thinks i should wait for my beta.
today i didn't test and had a nice day at work, just playing ostrich and hiding from everything. but of course, i took another test when i got home which was also negative. tonight i didn't cry, because even on the box it states that only 53% of women get a bfp this early. i haven't decided if i'll take one tomorrow, but as the beta gets closer (friday) i am becoming more and more nervous. i just felt so... broken, after the last failed cycle. i didn't expect it to be easy but i also didn't expect to feel so shattered. it's only been two cycles, and we've only been at this clinic for four months, and yet i feel really brittle and am not sure what to do next if this doesn't work. i assumed with donor sperm we'd be guaranteed a bfp but after seeing our fertilization reports that's no longer the case. i didn't plan for a plan c... how do you ladies keep on going?
Hello from Switzerland!
Blue, there is a 6 hour time difference so while it's about 4am for me, it's about 10am here. I'm fairly exhausted although I did get 4.5 hours of sleep last night which is better than I usually do! Yah for having everything ready to start!!! I can't wait to be with you through your journey!
Aura, I'm so sorry that you're going through this. I agree that it is way too early to test but I know the pull that those POASs have! Definitely take a day or two off from testing. Perhaps wait until the day of the beta to test? I'm all about preparation but I also know that the hcg levels are quite fickle when it comes to POASs and anyway, I hear with IVF, the beta levels are normally quite low compared to those people who conceived naturally. I think that's why my clinic doesn't test until 13 days post transfer!!
Rcr, how odd considering usually you're such a good responder! Do you think that it's due to the drugs? Which regimen are you on? or maybe your body is just trying to have a rest cycle? I'm so with you about wishing we started on this journey sooner. Sometimes I get frustrated about it because I'm so happy with my DH that I wish we just got married sooner and started trying sooner...but then again, the dynamic may have changed. However, I do wish that I stopped taking BCPs way earlier than I did!!
Julie, I would go onto IVF. I'm 35 like you and I just don't want to put off TTCing because of my age. I agree with everyone else though that it's very dependent on whether going down the route would be financially viable. If it would be, I wouldn't wait another 6 months. However, what Blue says makes sense...maybe talk with the doctors to get their perspectives on your chances of success with any of the possible routes.
Belly, thank you for putting me at ease!! How are you doing? You should be starting the Lupron soon, right?
April, just wanted to send out a virtual hug and say that I'm thinking about you...
Talk to everyone soon! I'm so happy that our meeting doesn't begin until 11am this morning because I'm pretty tired still but I need to get ready. Luckily, the meeting is in the hotel I'm staying at so the commute is unbeatable ;o) No sight-seeing, although dinner with the clients tonight so we will probably be going to downtown Zurich tonight. All I want to do, however, is skip that and just finish up with the meeting and then nap!
so good to hear from you renavoo! i hope your trip is treating you well, and i hope your dinner in zurich is more fun than the airport hotel. heheh
today is 9dp3dt. 12 days past ovulation. bfn on two separate brands. i have two test left. i'm going to take them tomorrow. and not take one the day of the beta because i don't want to go into the office in hysterics. i don't know what i'm going to do. *sigh*
Rena - Hope you are managing to enjoy your trip. I love traveling for work, but I only travel a few times a year, and only internationally every other year or so, so I make a vacation out of it and usually take DS, and stay for a while afterward or before. I imagine if I had to do it all the time, and I was not able to make it into a vacation, it would quickly loose its appeal. Sorry you are jet-lagged. That's the worst
Aura - its still early - try not to freak out.
AFM - It is odd that my eggs are not moving. When I did the three IUIs in a row, I kept getting more and more eggs every cycle, so I kinda thought that the meds just build up and the cycles get better every time, with back-to-back cycles. I asked the RE if this could be true, and she said that is not how it works, although I still thought that was how it worked for me. I actually don't have much hope for these IUIs, but I was thinking that at least if I do IVF right away they may make me have more eggs. I don't know now though. Hopefully they catch up today and tomorrow. My appointment is tomorrow morning, they are just giving me a few more days of meds to see if they get going. I am more excited about my video appointment with the RE on Monday than anything else, I hope she has something positive to say about another IVF try.
Blue - glad the meds came. What a relief it must be to actually have them in your hands!
Julie - I don't know what the right answer is for your situation but the ladies had some good input!! I hope what ever you decide you get that BFP you want!!
Blue - for getting all your meds. I really pray this is your month and the end of your journey has a baby in your arms!!
Aura - hugs! I can only imagine how har it is to not POAS!! Have you been having any more symptoms? How many dpt is your beta? It just feels really far away!!
Renavoo - good luck on your presentation. I hope the rest of your week flys by and that you have gotten some of your much needed rest.
RCR - I think our bodies are such sensitive creatures and they sometimes respond differenlty to the same thing. I will never understand it. I hope the few extra days was enough to get those eggs grwoing and you don't have to cancel this cycle!!
AFM - LOTS of crying yesterday. But, today is a new day and time to put that foot forward. I think DH is not over where we are (and to be honest I am sure I am not either). I want to at least meeting with the adoption agency. We have had one in mind since before we started this journey in '07. I have always had that gut feeling I would adopt... just wasn't ready yet. So, we have friends who have adopted from this agency and we know the director of the orginiziation. I want to meet with them and atleast know the process and then when we are ready to move forward we know what is needed. I am just not sure how to break the news to my mom as she is against us adopting (which is strange because I am adopted). I found an awesome quote yesterday that really helped me make it through the day that I thought I would share...
“We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us” - Joseph Campbell
April -Sending more hugs your way.....! I'm glad you have an adoption agency picked out and can at least get some more information while you decide what to do. DH and I had said that our last fresh IVF was going to be our last with the hopes that it would work and if not we would have had some frozen embies to try while we figure out if adoption is what our next option is if we don't get pregnant, but now we are on to this next cycle with the same plan so we will see where it takes us this time. The whole expense of the whole thing is what get me. You'd think people would pay you to adopt b/c it is such a great thing to do for a child. I'm surprised your mom is against it... that is really weird to me. Did she give you her reasoning? Keep us posted on your journey. You may also be able to help some of us that are also contemplating this option. PS. love your quote and I may have to steal it. I think I need to tell myself that every day when I wake up in the morning!!!
rcr - Weird is all i can say. Who knows what goes on with our bodies these days... i don't even think the drs understand it all either. My Dad always says "that is why they call it a practice b/c they are practicing until they get it right". LOL So did they up your fsh meds then or no? I'll be interesting in hearing what is going on from your RE's perspective. Is this normal to have an appt or did they set it up extra b/c of what is going on?
aura - I know i have said this many times, but even with my first IVF that we got a BFP w/ and then m/c I tested the day before the beta and it was neg and the next day the beta was positive, so I say don't do it. I know it is easier to have you hopes let down before you go in for the test if it is going to be a BFN, but i think it just adds extra stress. Crossing my fingers and praying that you get a huge surprise w/ your beta.
renavoo - hope this trip goes fast for you and you can get back home soon. Are you on any shots right now or where are you at in this process??
Hi to everyone else too.
AFM - Not much going on here. I start Lupron tomorrow night, so we will be getting this ball rolling and then I'll just be waiting for AF to show up to have my baseline u/s & bw done. I think she is suppose to show up maybe Nov 7th or 8th, so we will see.
april, your quote made me cry. it's perhaps the most beautiful sentiment, i will have to share it with my husband. i think it perfectly sums up what we are all going through.
blue- hooray for lupron!
rcr- so weird about your eggs, i hope the meds kick them into gear. maybe they are saving themselves for ivf?
belly, your dd is so cute! i am glad she can help you and isn't worried about you during all this. someone really wants a sibling, eh? adorable!
afm- major happenings today. around 3pm i discovered blood on my pad (have to wear them due to suppositories). not a TON, but more than what i would call spotting. i have also never spotted, so i don't really know what classifies spotting. however there was no blood when i wiped. i freaked out, called the re, and they said it's either af or i'm pregnant. awesome. so they are moving my beta to tomorrow morning instead of friday, which is a relief. so far, there is no more bleeding. slight pink when i wipe but so light i had to really look. is this spotting? could this be implantation? i had some crazy intense cramping after, some really sharp, not quite like af cramps but could be.... i am too nervous to be too positive but i am hoping this is a good sign. i never had any sort of spotting at all with my bfn ivf cyle, so this is all new to me. please don't be af. PLEASE don't be af!
Aura, I hope it's a great sign!!!!! Please please please... my fingers, toes, and every other limb is crossed for you!!! Let us know how the test comes out.
Belly, YAH! to having started already! Wow, you are on a really long protocol but time is going to pass by quickly, I'm sure. And how cute is that story about DD. Awww it must be so wonderful to see your DD and have her emulate you. There's nothing like the love of your child!
April, what a beautiful quote. It's is truly inspiring. When you say that DH is not really over where you are, what do you mean? Do you mean that you may want to try one more time before adoption? And it is odd that your mother doesn't want you to adopt! I think that it's wonderful that you and your DH are so supportive of each other!
RCR, I hope that the US shows that the follies have started growing. What CD is it?
Blue, how long are you on Lupron? Your AF won't show until November? That seems like a loooooong cycle! But at least you're getting started!
My gosh, I'm exhausted so I will catch up on personals soon. My schedule has been insane...here's an example:
Tuesday: land at 12pm, work until 9pm preparing for presentation, dinner until 10:30pm, conference call from 10:30 to 12am.
Wednesday: meet with team at 8am. Meeting until 7pm. Dinner with clients until 11:45pm (seriously, it's insane. Do we really need a 4.5 hour dinner?!?!) currently writing to you ladies but also checking over my email and working on things that I missed because I was out of the office (it's 12:45am right now)
Tomorrow: 7am start. Meeting until 7pm. Then HOPEFULLY, quiet dinner with the team.
Home on FRIDAY!! YAAAAAAAAAAAH! I can't wait to go home!
haha ok I'm getting loopy from exhaustion now. I will try to catch up with you tomorrow.
Aura, so sorry you have had to deal with all the extra stress of bleeding/spotting. I am glad it has stopped. Thank goodness your beta was moved to today. If your embryo implanted yesterday I don't think it would show up on a beta. How many days are you? 8dp3dt? There are definitely lots of stories of late implanters, I think generally implantation happens between 6-10 days past ovulation/retrieval. But even if it isn't implantation bleeding, it could be just "normal" pregnancy bleeding. I think that is more common than a super late implanter. I am hoping and praying for some good news this morning!
Renavoo, hope you were able to get a few minutes of rest. What a busy trip! But hopefully time is flying and you are home before you know it!
AFM, I go in for my baseline blood work this morning. I guess I'll find out if I am fully supressed.
Hope everyone else is having a good day!
April I've been thinking about you a lot the last days, too.
blue, I think you asked me forever ago: I have to go back to work in mid-Nov. Hubby and I have started having him bottle-feed her my pumped milk once a day in preparation. I had a really good hard cry about starting the process of being away from her for 9 hours a day on weekdays. I so cherish the time I have with her right now, and if we could manage it I would absolutely stay home and be a SAHM. I am torn between feeling guilty because we're lucky to have her at all, and feeling justified because we waited so long. I'm going to be following you with high hopes this cycle!
I'm stalking along and rooting for all you ladies! I just feel so much love and hope for this little precious community!