Bitter Sushi Ladies, September 2011

[Smilesarefree]

Welcome to the September Thread

This is a thread for those who have been TTC for a long time, whether 6 months, 12 months, or more. At this point many of us are at or past 1 or 2 years, many have had losses, many are dealing with various forms of infertility, and some are just in a waiting period until they can TTC again.

The name? Well, all things considered we tend to be a little bitter sometimes. So read with care. And due to everything, our emotions run a little raw like sushi. Too many cycles of BFN and CD1 sushi & sake to console ourselves. This TTC business is something that seems to "just happen" for so many...but we just can't seem to get it right. So this is where we can be together, share and express anything.

Current Bitter Sushi Ladies

abstract

33, and DH (36), TTC (his #2, my #1) off-and-on since November 2006

AGreenMum10

Trying since Nov 2009 , 1 ectopic - down a tube (May 2010), 2 losses (Aug 2010 & Jan 2011)

Attached2Elijah

Hoping for #3 for 4 years and 3 months with 6 months hard TTC (charting, etc) after previous unexplained secondary infertility.

blueyezz4

TTC #1 (technically #4-long story) since 2006; Moving on to our first FET after 5 failed IUI's and 1 IVF

CA Country Girl

Me (35) and DH (same) with one wonderful DD, TTC #2 for well over a year, now trying acupuncture and herbs

Calycanth

TTC #1 since March 2010, one miscarriage May 2010

cbaa2010

TTC # 1 since Oct 2010

collieflower

TTC #2 for 2 years, with 4 m/c (and another before DC#1)

enigo

Has one beautiful son, trying to conceive after three losses

Gemmine  

 me (27) & DH (28) TTC #1 since July 2010 with 1 loss April 2011 (5 weeks)

IsisandOsiris

TTC #1 since August 2009

jenger

Mama to DD (4/07) TTC #2 since August 2009.

jennabella

TTC #2 since July 2009, with a loss in February 2010 and a loss in July 2010

kinza

TTC #1 since November 2008, with PCOS and Male Factor

kittenbritches

TTC #3 since May 2010

kparker

TTC #1 since 9/08 with male factor, IUI #4 ???

 lilmom

36, TTC #2 for 2 years with PCOS and rarely ovulating

littlest birds

TTC for 16+ months after VR

Milk8shake

Still ttc#1 after four losses - currently awaiting test results

monkeyscience

me (27) and dh (25) TTC #1 with PCOS since 6/10 - waiting till May 2012 to decide on further interventions 

Objet_Trouve

TTC #1 since Jan 2010 with PCOS

Praha

Waiting since 2004; TTC since 10/10; losses 1/11, 4/11, and 7/11

rcr

TTC #2 since 12/2007, one loss in September 2010, one failed IVF in February 2011

Smilesarefree

36 year old mom of one wonderful dd trying for another since April 2010

Sourire

TTC #1 since August 2010

Wissa19

Wissa19 (33), DH (38) sweet buddy (12/07), TTC #2 since 06/09

yoyonana

34 , DH 31, TTC for 3 years, done all kinds of tests, unexplained infertilitty

In our thoughts, on hold, and/or waiting

silverbird

ttc #1 since June 2010, after a two year delay for illness. Husband passed away 5/25/11

mi_dawn

lost baby William (born still 4/09) and two m/c in 09.

BSL BFPs!!! Stick little babies, stick, stick, stick...

Vivica2  - due?

TandN - due 5/17/12

Sweetest77 - due 5/20/12

Kyamo - due 3/7/2012

laggie - due early 2/2012

MommyMatsumoto - due 1/2012

Emaya - due 1/2012

Sweet.Bee - due 1/15/2012

lavatea - due 12/2011

miriam bat avraham - due 11/28/2011

Rachel88 - due 11/20/2011

MahnaMahna - due 11/2011

Jane - due 10/3/2011

grahnola mum - due 10/3/2011

borobaby - due 9/12/2011

justthinkn - due 9/2/2011

Waiting on an update...

BSL BABIES

Maurine - 7/20/11

Tear 78 - Anika 7/15/11

slylives - Cameron 6/15/11

kalamos23 - baby boy 4/28/11

xtara2003x - Emerson Rae 4/27/11

jenniferadurham - Ryan born 3/28/11!

Nanette56 - Tristan and Cael born 3/18/11!

finnegansmom - Henry born 2/11!

jessica_s - Asher Kingston 1/20/11

LINK to our graduates thread - Spring 2011 Edition!

Please let the threadkeeper (smilesarefree) know if your info needs to be updated.

New ladies are always welcome, but please join with care.

Please put all notes for changes or additions to this post in bold! Thank you!!  

Edited by Smilesarefree - 9/14/11 at 3:54am

[TandN]

Thank you for the new thread, smiles!

LTB- I'm glad they are getting the paperwork and you're almost to the good part! I'm so sorry nothing came back as conclusive with your RE. I agree, it is really difficult to just have 'unexplained' infertility. Why is there no need to find more answers? Just because there is a Clomid band-aid does not mean we have to use it. I would hope that the need to find a solution would vary among RE's, but maybe not. Thinking of you as this new chapter begins. I hope your feeling of being at peace carried you through those difficult times like at the gym. (hugs)

Lilmom- Your description of the gallbladder problems sounds so incredibly painful. I'm sorry that your doc won't do anything but refer! I hope you can get in to see the gastro soon. The pain from the surgery will be easier than this!

CA- Welcome! I loved your DH's analogy, too. It's definitely good to have a sense of humor in all this. My DH is a middle school teacher so I hear a lot of immature (but funny) comebacks from him about TTC. The other day I asked him to put something in the oven and he said 'I'll put a bun in YOUR oven!'. Lol...he's good for something even if there's no bun yet.

Kinza- keeping my fingers crossed for the IVF!!

Milkshake- Thinking if you, glad your doctor is open with you, but that 50% seems like a random statistic. (hugs)

Cba- Sorry you weren't ready for O, but I hope it happens anyway!

AFM- Waiting to hear my CD 21 progesterone results today. Then another 10 days of waiting, yeah!

[LessTraveledBy]

Thank you TandN!

Just subbing.... and always reading and thinking of you all.

[kittenbritches]

Hi, ladies!  I hope it is all right if I join you all...as each cycle drags by with BFNs, I'm feeling more like a BSL than anything else.  It doesn't look like there are many (if any) of you TTC #3, so I hope I'd still be welcome.

We've been TTC #3 since May 2010, and I've decided that if I don't get pregnant by the end of October I am going to see my OB/GYN to try to figure out what is going on (but I have a feeling I'll get the awesome dx of "Unexplained Secondary Infertility").  I have high testosterone, fibrocystic breasts (which makes me wonder if I might have uterine fibroids--my mom did), but I ovulate on my own.  My cycles are somewhat irregular and my LP varies quite a bit, but seems to have stabilized over the last little bit.

Anyway...I'm just waiting for AF now, and we'll see what September brings!

[Smilesarefree]

Kittenbritches - Of course you are welcome here!  Sorry for the circumstances that bring you here but welcome!  I will add you to our front page, I am assuming that "TTC #3 since May 2010" is what you would like your blurb to say?  If not let me know and I will change it.

[kittenbritches]

Thank you so much. :)  And you've got it about the blurb...not sure what else to say.  LOL.

[Kinza]

Thanks for the new thread, Smiles!

And welcome to kittenbritches.

[toothfairy2be]

Welcome kittenbritches- I recognize you from the One Thread & look forward to getting to know you better, it seems like there are a few of us feeling more like BSL and less like we are "One" of many women who pop out BFP's like skittles. You will find all the support and advice you need here & hopefully move up and out soon.

LTB- Yay for your paperwork getting pushed ahead, it is an exciting time for your family to be nearer the finish line in having a foster baby/child. Did you say you have looked into NaPro providers in Europe? I am thinking after I give the RE a try I will trek out to our nearest NaPro provider from some real answers, over an hour away.

THANK YOU for the new Thread Smiles!

AFM- I got crosshairs today that I did ovulate 3 days ago, I am still spotting a lot, this is my # 1 concern and it has gotten progressively worse since we started TTC- started with 2 days before AF and occasionally a day or 2 after O, and now extends from O until AF every month. I also have fibrocystic very painful breasts, cravings (literally, I've eaten my weight in salt and vinegar chips since O), back pain... I could complain on and on. The prospect of O is so hopeful just to be crushed by all of these negative things, I tried progesterone cream, if anything the spotting was worse. I don't get it?!

[Milk8shake]

Originally Posted by TandN 

My DH is a middle school teacher so I hear a lot of immature (but funny) comebacks from him about TTC. The other day I asked him to put something in the oven and he said 'I'll put a bun in YOUR oven!'. Lol...he's good for something even if there's no bun yet.
 

Am I the only one that watches Scrubs, and thought immediately of "The Todd"??
 

Originally Posted by cbaa2010 

AFM- I got crosshairs today that I did ovulate 3 days ago, I am still spotting a lot, this is my # 1 concern and it has gotten progressively worse since we started TTC- started with 2 days before AF and occasionally a day or 2 after O, and now extends from O until AF every month.

I'm totally no expert, but it sounds to me like your hormones are wacky!  I know, right - really helpful!  Thanks for nothing!! Seriously though, I'm sure someone here will have some advice

LTB: Wahooo!!! It will have all been worthwhile so soon!  I'm excited for you

lilmom - hope you are feeling ok

Kittenbritches - welcome! you are so cute!! I know, totally relevant....

AFM:  I just have to add another male TTC metaphor story.  DP is a heavy machinery auto electrician.  @ the hospital on Monday, the GYN was explaining my testing to him like "you know how if there is a fault with the truck, and you check all the electrics and they are fine, you have to think outside the box a bit, and figure out what else you can check".  If you didn't get it, I'm the truck!!

[lilmom]

Thanks for the new thread, Smiles!  I hate having to ask this but you could you change my blurb to say I am 36 instead of 35? Oh good grief i hate even seeing it in type! But it's true..

cbaa- What does the doc say about your spotting? There are other issues it could be besides progesterone..a different hormonal problem maybe, as Milkshake said..I would definitely get it checked out or re-checked as the case may be, especially if it's just getting worse!! So sorry!

TandN- Hope your test results give you some answers and some help!! 10 days will go by before you know it.

LTB- You are getting soooo close! I'm really excited for you and your future foster baby, whoever he or she may be! I know it must be so frustrating though to still not have answers. I hope they do come soon.

Milkshake- Thanks!! And I think you are the nicest truck I know, LOL.

Welcome to our group, kittenbritches! I hope your stay is short and also hope the ob.gyn gives you some answers soon!

AFM, I have an appt with the gastro on the 13th. That was the earliest I could get. I felt a little better today actually. I hope it will continue! Also, I still have not O'ed..CD55 now. Of course I am so preoccupied with this other health crisis I am having that I have not been very focused on that, which is good. I had to run an errand last night and ran into a friend who just had her 3rd baby..a beautiful little girl..and I nearly cried when she asked me if we wanted more kids. I told her we had been trying for quite a long time and she was so nice about it. She said she tried for a year and a half with the first and she thought it would never happen. (I did not explain that it has actually been longer than that for us, I just listened) She said she got so angry, that she started "willing" her body to just do it, and every day telling her body "This is what you were made for! Just do it!" and it eventually worked. I think I have been willing it to happen for some time, but somehow it did make me feel better to tell this lady about it, even though her advice may not have been exactly right, it made me feel good that someone thinks it actually MIGHT still happen for me. My own "bff" has gotten so tired of hearing me talk about it that she never encourages me anymore, and I think it's because she thinks it will not happen. It is very depressing and I am not sure why I bother to tell her, other than the fact that she is one of only a handful of people who know all the details. I need more people on my team encouraging me I think! Anyway, I have been thinking lately that if I can get this gallbladder (or whatever it is) problem behind me, then maybe my body will be able to carry a baby to term again, and I am actually really looking forward to getting it resolved when I think of it in that way. Maybe this is exactly what I need to do to have that happen. I know my prayer for some months now has been, "Lord, make whatever needs to happen happen so that I can do it". So maybe this is it. I'm hopeful anyway.

[LessTraveledBy]

Originally Posted by cbaa2010 

AFM- I got crosshairs today that I did ovulate 3 days ago, I am still spotting a lot, this is my # 1 concern and it has gotten progressively worse since we started TTC- started with 2 days before AF and occasionally a day or 2 after O, and now extends from O until AF every month. I also have fibrocystic very painful breasts, cravings (literally, I've eaten my weight in salt and vinegar chips since O), back pain... I could complain on and on. The prospect of O is so hopeful just to be crushed by all of these negative things, I tried progesterone cream, if anything the spotting was worse. I don't get it?!

Your situation sounds to me exactly like the sort of thing the NapRo people would be great at!

To answer your question, no. I am in Northern Europe, so I would need to fly to the nearest NapRo center and then pay for the doctors and tests on top of that. My husband is a student and I work online part time, so there is no way we could afford it. Now that I think of it, what that sounds like to someone reading it, I should add that I am not going to put dd in daycare and go to work just in case we could then have a baby. What we have now comes first, as there are no guarantees that it would ever work, anyway. I suppose we can take another look at things in 2-3 years, after dh's graduation. We might even live for some time in a country with a Napro center. However, I will then be 36 and dd will be 8... Yikes.

TBH, though, the "must get a baby or I will die" feeling is just no longer part of my daily life. I want to walk in my path all the way to the end, doing what I am supposed to, instead of being dragged along kicking and screaming. (It has been that long, and we have already been blessed with a child... It was and would be different otherwise.) If no good, loving families had to experience infertility of some kind, there would be far fewer families fostering and adopting. And no, I am not saying anything about anyone else's situation and infertility is still a terrible, terrible thing. Yet, I know that we love kids and I know that we would not foster if we were able to have more children, as we would likely have biological kids until I was too old to have any. So... If we are needed as a foster family, this is the only way it could happen. I have never been good at concentrating on more than one project at a time, so short term fostering is "the project" right now, and infertility stuff is kind of on the side.
 

Originally Posted by Milk8shake 

AFM:  I just have to add another male TTC metaphor story.  DP is a heavy machinery auto electrician.  @ the hospital on Monday, the GYN was explaining my testing to him like "you know how if there is a fault with the truck, and you check all the electrics and they are fine, you have to think outside the box a bit, and figure out what else you can check".  If you didn't get it, I'm the truck!!

LOL! I love this. Do you suppose that my doctors need something like this to get it? ;) They simply go down their list and there is absolutely no  thought given to what might be causing things in our particular case.
 

Originally Posted by lilmom My own "bff" has gotten so tired of hearing me talk about it that she never encourages me anymore, and I think it's because she thinks it will not happen. It is very depressing and I am not sure why I bother to tell her, other than the fact that she is one of only a handful of people who know all the details. I need more people on my team encouraging me I think!

That is a tough situation because, yes, you do need people who are willing to listen. Yet, especially if someone has not yet gone through any big sorrows, I think it is easy to start seeing the sad person as someone who just likes to whine and should get a grip. I have a couple of friends to whom I could always tell. It only worked, though, because one of them is no danger to total sadness and things being unfair in life, and the other is a long time friend and so caring that she was always willing to listen. Now that I think of it, she also has gone through a lot in life, so would never just expect me to snap out of it.

I spoke with someone yesterday, who was at our final foster training, and this family already have a short time foster child in their home. I am very excited for them but now even more annoyed that, while they were able to sign the papers weeks ago, we still don't have them. We should have been paper ready at the exact same time, and here we are, not even on the waiting list, yet. UGH! Apparently the papers should arrive today... I really need to talk myself down, as I do believe that we will look after the very child/ren that need us. So maybe the first child has not even been born yet, who knows. Yet, I find it hard to not be annoyed. I am big on being fair, and I, once again, need to remind myself that the world is not a fair place. (Anyone struggling with infertility has had to face that fact, I am sure.) I guess there are feeling in me that say "They don't like you as much and will always keep you waiting longer than other people."

Thinking of you all. Welcome kittenbritches!
 

[Gemmine]

Hi ladies. I would like to join. I have been lurking here since early spring so I feel like I "know" a lot of you already. And of course I recognize some of you from other threads. I have been trying to conceive #1 since July 2010. I'm currently on Cycle #11 of KNOWING everything was "perfect" (timing, etc.) and my temp just crashed this morning so I'll be starting Cycle #12 next week. I had an early miscarriage in April. I ovulate regularly, my LP seems to be normal. One problem I thought I had was lack of fertile CM so I started EPO this cycle; but I haven't seen any results yet. I'm trying to decide between seeing an OB or an RE if Cycle 12 doesn't work out.

I guess my blurb can just say me (27) & DH (28) TTC #1 since July 2010 with 1 loss April 2011 (5 weeks).

Thank you so much. I will come back and jump in with personals.

[kittenbritches]

Originally Posted by cbaa2010 

Welcome kittenbritches- I recognize you from the One Thread & look forward to getting to know you better, it seems like there are a few of us feeling more like BSL and less like we are "One" of many women who pop out BFP's like skittles. You will find all the support and advice you need here & hopefully move up and out soon.

AFM- I got crosshairs today that I did ovulate 3 days ago, I am still spotting a lot, this is my # 1 concern and it has gotten progressively worse since we started TTC- started with 2 days before AF and occasionally a day or 2 after O, and now extends from O until AF every month. I also have fibrocystic very painful breasts, cravings (literally, I've eaten my weight in salt and vinegar chips since O), back pain... I could complain on and on. The prospect of O is so hopeful just to be crushed by all of these negative things, I tried progesterone cream, if anything the spotting was worse. I don't get it?!

Thanks, cbaa!  Yeah, I actually cried when one of the ladies got their BFP, and through all of this I've NEVER cried about it before -- especially over someone else getting pregnant.  It made me feel terrible (that I felt that way), and I certainly don't want to take from anyone's joy and excitement.  I'm just getting worn out, I guess.

As for your spotting, I definitely think it would be worth it to have other potential causes checked out.  That has to be so disheartening...and I hate the unknown!   I hope you'll be able to get some answers.  And my breasts KILL me where my fibroids are -- especially during my LP.  Of course, I'm always trying to think that the pain is related to phantom pregnancies, so I've gotta pull my head out on that one.  

Originally Posted by Milk8shake 

Kittenbritches - welcome! you are so cute!! I know, totally relevant....

AFM:  I just have to add another male TTC metaphor story.  DP is a heavy machinery auto electrician.  @ the hospital on Monday, the GYN was explaining my testing to him like "you know how if there is a fault with the truck, and you check all the electrics and they are fine, you have to think outside the box a bit, and figure out what else you can check".  If you didn't get it, I'm the truck!!

Aww, thanks, Milk8shake!  You're too sweet.   LOL at being the truck.  Nice metaphor -- and it's good to know that your gyn *does* think outside the box!

Quote:

Originally Posted by lilmom 

AFM, I have an appt with the gastro on the 13th. That was the earliest I could get. I felt a little better today actually. I hope it will continue! Also, I still have not O'ed..CD55 now. Of course I am so preoccupied with this other health crisis I am having that I have not been very focused on that, which is good. I had to run an errand last night and ran into a friend who just had her 3rd baby..a beautiful little girl..and I nearly cried when she asked me if we wanted more kids. I told her we had been trying for quite a long time and she was so nice about it. She said she tried for a year and a half with the first and she thought it would never happen. (I did not explain that it has actually been longer than that for us, I just listened) She said she got so angry, that she started "willing" her body to just do it, and every day telling her body "This is what you were made for! Just do it!" and it eventually worked. I think I have been willing it to happen for some time, but somehow it did make me feel better to tell this lady about it, even though her advice may not have been exactly right, it made me feel good that someone thinks it actually MIGHT still happen for me. My own "bff" has gotten so tired of hearing me talk about it that she never encourages me anymore, and I think it's because she thinks it will not happen. It is very depressing and I am not sure why I bother to tell her, other than the fact that she is one of only a handful of people who know all the details. I need more people on my team encouraging me I think! Anyway, I have been thinking lately that if I can get this gallbladder (or whatever it is) problem behind me, then maybe my body will be able to carry a baby to term again, and I am actually really looking forward to getting it resolved when I think of it in that way. Maybe this is exactly what I need to do to have that happen. I know my prayer for some months now has been, "Lord, make whatever needs to happen happen so that I can do it". So maybe this is it. I'm hopeful anyway.

I hope you'll be able to get some answers from your doc!  That is so tough about your friend not being encouraging.  I have only told one person IRL that we are trying... I told my brother, sister, and BFF when we started trying last year and while there was support, there wasn't much interest.  And now that we've been at it for such a long time, no one asks -- I think they assume we've actually given up, TBH.   that you'll get your health issues resolved fairly easily and your body will be ready to carry a baby!

 

Originally Posted by LessTraveledBy 

I spoke with someone yesterday, who was at our final foster training, and this family already have a short time foster child in their home. I am very excited for them but now even more annoyed that, while they were able to sign the papers weeks ago, we still don't have them. We should have been paper ready at the exact same time, and here we are, not even on the waiting list, yet. UGH! Apparently the papers should arrive today... I really need to talk myself down, as I do believe that we will look after the very child/ren that need us. So maybe the first child has not even been born yet, who knows. Yet, I find it hard to not be annoyed. I am big on being fair, and I, once again, need to remind myself that the world is not a fair place. (Anyone struggling with infertility has had to face that fact, I am sure.) I guess there are feeling in me that say "They don't like you as much and will always keep you waiting longer than other people."

Thinking of you all. Welcome kittenbritches!

I hope your papers arrive today!  

AFM: Temp is down a bit today, and I'm thinking AF will be here tomorrow.  I'll be so relieved when I finally start.  I just want to Get On With It!!

[CA Country Girl]

Hello Ladies

Hope you all enjoy the weekend and in the US, the long weekend (I think Labor Day is U.S. only, right?).  I am so impressed with this strong and supportive group of women. Thanks so much for your wisdom and your kindness!

Welcome Gemmine- I am in a similar situation. Seem pretty normal, know I have been getting the timing right for months and months.  So glad I joined here, and I think you will be to.

LessTraveledBy- I hope your foster baby/child comes to you quickly.  It is a wonderful thing for them and you.  I dream of doing that too one day, whether I have another of my own or not.  So many little ones out there that need a family.

Kittenbritches- This quote below is me right before I joined Bitter Sushi Ladies too!

Originally Posted by Kittenbritches Thanks, cbaa!  Yeah, I actually cried when one of the ladies got their BFP, and through all of this I've NEVER cried about it before -- especially over someone else getting pregnant.  It made me feel terrible (that I felt that way), and I certainly don't want to take from anyone's joy and excitement.  I'm just getting worn out, I guess.

Except, I have cried before.  It was BFP's in the 1st cycle trying ones that got me the worst.  I cried and then felt lousy about it- like I was such a mean person.  I have had a hard time being happy for friends IRL who get pregnant too.  I want this journey to make me a kinder and more understanding person, not a smaller one.  

Having you all to talk to really helps.  Thanks.  

[toothfairy2be]

Originally Posted by LessTraveledBy 

To answer your question, no. I am in Northern Europe, so I would need to fly to the nearest NapRo center and then pay for the doctors and tests on top of that. My husband is a student and I work online part time, so there is no way we could afford it. Now that I think of it, what that sounds like to someone reading it, I should add that I am not going to put dd in daycare and go to work just in case we could then have a baby.

I wish there were more Napro centers available, it seems the technology should be widespread to any RE (aren't they supposed to be endocrinologists?!), why aren't they taking advantage of actually solving the problem instead of just sticking it with a bandaid. I do agree and understand what you saying, 'is the juice worth the squeeze' especially with no guarantee of success. Your daughter is lucky to have a mother (and father) who put her first 100% of the time, I would hope nobody would suggest you change that. I am excited for your paperwork to arrive & that you will soon have a foster! Just think (even though it is hard that life isn't always fair- in any circumstance!) how quickly the other couple received their first foster, that will be you soon!!! It is a very exciting time.

Milk8shake- my hormones are indeed wacky the comic relief helps. The RE didn't seem concerned, just said to get my bloodwork, US, & HSG done.

lilmom-I'm sorry your BFF is no longer supportive, I think that's one reason I am so drawn to the forums here, IRL my friends just don't understand. They think I'm just 'trying too hard' and 'I just need to relax', as they have either had children without trying, or have no interest in reproducing at this time, they just.dont.get.it. I hope you are finding the support you need & that after your gallbladder is treated ASAP so you feel better soon! Also, I just started seeing the RE- haven't had my 'review' yet, so I hope they will listen to me more next week!

Gemmine- welcome my friend, I am so glad to be able to keep up with you- Sad that it has gone on so long, but glad that you are here!

kittenbritches-AF should make herself at home in the uterus of a teenager & not with any of us.

AFM-  I hope everyone celebrating Labor Day this weekend has a nice holiday - I for one am looking forward to an extra day off!!!

[Smilesarefree]

Lilmom - I made the change, I know how you feel, I will have to change mine to say 37 in a few months.

Gemmine - Welcome, I have added you.

For you guys talking about crying/feeling sad about hearing about other people's bfp's I know exactly how you feel, I want to be happy for those people and I feel so small that I cannot, I used to be able to be happy for them but over time I have lost the ability.  I have to say though that I am still overjoyed when a BSL gets their BFP.   I was thinking about my sil today and how she can literally decide, 'it's time to get pregnant again' and 2 weeks later be pregnant it just seems so unfair to me that it is not that easy for everyone.

AFM I am hoping that I did not o super early as I was not expecting it and so we only got in one bd.  Although the cm and cp point to yes I did, I am hoping that I it was just an oddity and that I have yet to o.  I guess only time will tell.  I am also enjoying a long weekend - we have labor day in Canada too, dh and I actually took today off work to have a super long weekend!

[monkeyscience]

Drive by to subscribe, as I don't have internet ATM. Why is it only busy when I can't check in??

Nothing going on here, but I have been reading along. Oh, and there are lots of bun and oven jokes at our house. There are also dorky Starcraft jokes that center around my reproductive organs. Yeah. Nerds. Big.fat.nerds.

Good luck to everyone, and I'll be back to posting more around next Wednesday!

[lilmom]

Gemmine-Welcome to the group! I for one think you should see an RE. I am practically dying over here to see an RE but there are none within a 3 hr radius of me. I have had very little success with ob.gyns trying to "treat" infertility. Those that I have seen just want to give out clomid like candy but don't want to do any actual testing to find out what the problem is or what the best method of treatment now. Now, that may not be true for your ob.gyn but that is my experience. So, I vote for RE, since I have seen friends of mine (who live in a bigger city where I used to live) have great success with the RE.

LTB- hope your papers arrived today!! You're almost there..and I don't think it is personal or that anyone likes you less than the other couple who got their paperwork faster..who knows what might have caused that..but you are right that God has a plan and you will have the child you are meant to have! I know you probably feel so ready for it to happen though!

Thanks everyone for being so sweet about my bff not being supportive. I think part of it is that she has no kids and doesn't seem to be in any rush to have them, so she just really doesn't get it. It's strange..because when we were younger she desperately wanted kids, and as many as she could get..then she married a man who doesn't really want them, and she sort of changed her mind I guess to be with him. Unfathomable to me, but that is what she did. I just wish I had an IRL buddy who I could talk to about it who gets it. It's strange because I have tried to talk to my mom and my aunt about it, since they both had fertility issues but ended up with kids, and they are pretty quick to end the conversation. It's like if we talk about it too much, it will somehow jinx it or something for me. That is the vibe they give off anyway, that it's just not something to be discussed. Occasionally my mom will have a conversation about it. But I am starting to feel like everyone I have talked about it with now feels that it has been too long and it will never happen. Sigh. Hopefully, once we move, I will make some wonderful new friends. I think I am going to try to talk less about it to the bff. It's not really worth it. She has used the "maybe if you stop trying it will just happen" line repeatedly now. Yeah, because with my issues it would definitely just happen, with me ovulating once in a blue moon and all that. She's a nurse, she should know better!

cbaa-I hope you they will listen to you more next week too.

[ISISandOSIRIS]

Hi ladies... sorry for the lack of personals, but I've been out of the loop for awhile and figured it would be easiest to just jump in.  I was on vacation with extended friends and family and dh and I really enjoyed spending time with my sister's kiddos. I'm expecting AF some time this week and plan on a cycle of clomid+IUI.  One snafu is that I was *just* hired (today) at a wonderful new school district, so I'm wondering if it would be best to wait just ONE MORE MONTH to get a full Sept-June year with them (with the hope that I actually *would* get pregnant via this second IUI).  Another side of me says it's God's plan and just try ASAP and if it happens it happens.  Basically, I'm asking for advice.  There never seems to be the perfect, right time to get pregnant, right? And for me, having a child is more of a priority than ANY job.  I'd appreciate any words of encouragement.

Much love and baby dust to all of you.

[LessTraveledBy]

Originally Posted by CA Country Girl 

Kittenbritches-

Except, I have cried before.  It was BFP's in the 1st cycle trying ones that got me the worst.

I am mainly at peace these days, but I still do need to stay away from situations like that. I read, by mistake, a thread in which someone was heart broken after just a couple of months of TTC. I honestly had to just sit down and think about the whole thing. It felt like WTH?! I am always amazed when people assume that they will get pregnant the month they decide to. Of course it works like that for some, even did for me though I did not expect it, but statistically... Come on. Anyway... We sometimes feel bad that friends don't understand us. On the other hand, I must say that I have very little to give to a person who cries and whines after just a couple of months of TTC. I really want to say something something like "Grow up." Anyway... I better not read about ttc anywhere else on the web.  (Part of the harsh response in my head, I think, is cultural. Whining about little things is just not cool in my culture.)

Originally Posted by cbaa2010 

I wish there were more Napro centers available, it seems the technology should be widespread to any RE (aren't they supposed to be endocrinologists?!), why aren't they taking advantage of actually solving the problem instead of just sticking it with a bandaid.

THIS, exactly. Then again, I really think and hope that things will change. At least there is also that Dr. Sami, the author of making babies, who has this exact same complaint. He seems upset that people are just about always recommended IUIs and IVFs, when a course of antibiotics or something equally simple might be what is actually needed.
 

Originally Posted by lilmom 

Thanks everyone for being so sweet about my bff not being supportive. I think part of it is that she has no kids and doesn't seem to be in any rush to have them, so she just really doesn't get it. It's strange..because when we were younger she desperately wanted kids, and as many as she could get..then she married a man who doesn't really want them, and she sort of changed her mind I guess to be with him.

Could her difficulty in supporting you be a result of her own unfulfilled wants? Maybe there is some bitterness there and she thinks that you at least have a child and even a husband willing to TTC. I know people change, but I do have a hard time believing that someone would go from really wanting kids to not wanting any... really... But maybe it can happen. I just don't understand it because it is so far from my own situation.
 

Originally Posted by ISISandOSIRIS  Basically, I'm asking for advice.  There never seems to be the perfect, right time to get pregnant, right? And for me, having a child is more of a priority than ANY job.  I'd appreciate any words of encouragement.

Well, to be honest, I doubt that I would wait due to a school year. But I do get your dilemma. Is there something like benefits involved or is it just that you would feel bad for the school if you left? If it is just that you thinking of the students and school and all that, I think everyone would understand if you told the colleagues that you had been trying and hoping for a long time.

AFM, ovulating, as the ultrasound doctor said, right on schedule. Had my first positive (or almost positive) OPK last night. I seem to be a person with very short surges, so I have to test at least 3 times a day and even then it may not quite be positive. I don't really need the OPK's, as I can go by mucus, only, but I am trying to do it all this cycle, since I had the ultrasound and will have progesterone measured and all that.

THE paperwork did arrive yesterday, so it is in the mail on its way back. I don't know if our information is already in their computer system or if we will need to wait to be added. However, MIL will come here in a couple of days and leave mid month, so in a way I would prefer a call after that, anyway. I am excited... and a bit scared. It has been soooo long since I took care of a little baby. It feels like forever ago, really.

I think life is calm and easy for me right now, partly due to fall and dd's classes and everything else that gives me a daily schedule. A year from now we will move abroad for a year. Then dd and I will spend the days together, having little to do, really, while dh is in school. I fear that a bit, as I think I will see the "lack" in our lives more again then. I just don't have lots of hope that there will be a baby to look after, then, either. I would love it if we could keep fostering, but we obviously can't take a baby with us abroad, and they will all be short term placements, anyway. (Part of me really wishes we did not need to move, but it is a lovely city and it really is important for dh's education.)

Edited by LessTraveledBy - 9/3/11 at 2:40am