Originally Posted by monkeyscience
AFM, maybe I've O'd? Not sure. Technically I might have, but the temps aren't as high as my usual post-O temps. But you should look at my chart, because it looks like a mirror-image of an ovulatory chart. Verrrry weird.
Monkey.... there is something odd going on with your chart. Did you have signs that ovulation might be about to happen? It seems to me that there are two possibilities: Either you did not ovulate and something caused those lower temps in the middle. The other possibility is that you did ovulate, However, in that case there is something wrong, as your temps should not stay up like that after AF. Or are your temps so much lower this cycle that those temps during AF are actually your normal low temps? I wish I remembered what I have read.. There is, however, some explanation to what could be wrong if the temps don't come down soon after AF. My friend has my big nfp book in another country, so I can't look for it, but I bet it can be found by googling. In any case, that should not be happening, if it indeed did happen.
AFM, starting to really hope and wait for a call about a foster baby, as mil will leave on Wednesday. I am SO ready for a baby to come. I got the "usual" responses this week about our situation, and also realized that I don't think mil has had any idea how hard out situation has been for us. (Thus all those stories about other people's kids that used to be really hard for me to hear.) The fact that I nursed dd until past 3,5 was probably interpreted by some as us not wanting more kids, etc. She also, I think, had wondered if that somehow could have caused our infertility. I also realized that motherhood is not as enjoyable or easy for some and that the thoughts of older people are colored by how things have turned out with their kids. If one has endless stress and even hearth break due to one's kids, I think it can become difficult to truly feel sad with the person who wants kids. It can be like "you should enjoy the life you have, as it could get much worse after those kids" or something like that. Yet, I would like to opportunity to try and have kids whose lives would not be a mess and all that. Funny thing, too, as we are voluntarily setting ourselves up for stress and heart break with this fostering thing. So there... But in any case, it was good to see things from another point of view. We are not the only ones that can be sensitive to certain things.... I suppose people's comments often reflect their own hurts.
HI BELOVED! I certainly remember you. I am happy for you and very worried for you at the same time, if that makes sense. I mean so much has happened to you in a very short period of time. I hope you are able to take time to heal and develop trust, if your boyfriend is someone worth your trust. I have thought of you often and have been so sad and angry for you for how your ex treated you.
By the way, I did not know I was one of those people who feel too ugly to look at photos of themselves, but that does seem to be true. I went to a party yesterday and don't want to click the link to see the photos. When I really think of it, though, I think I have never really wanted to see photos of myself. I have always felt fat, thanks to my parents trying to make me lose weight when I was 8 or so. Oh yeah, and the dumb doctor who asked my mom right in front of me when I was 7: "And what is the reason for this obesity?" I was very tall and a bit chubby, never truly fat. It seems that I had thyroid problems even then, and my dad has never been skinny, so there. I feel a bit sad to realize how I have always felt about myself. It was hard for me to get ready for the party yesterday, knowing that everyone else in the photos would be skinny and tall. I am not even fat, really, just have always been strong and "sturdy." Dh says I would have made a good country wife. ;)