Oh, Kenya, I'm just so sorry about all those feelings hitting you all at once. (DH and I had a similar type of conversation last night, too.) I really hear you because I too tend to be very aware and of my body, and can usually sense hormone variations very distinctly. And I'm pretty level-headed when it comes to assessing symptoms, so when I do allow myself to hope - it's not for nothing, you know? I'm just so sorry you're in that place where it hurts to hope and hurts not to hope. Please be kind to yourself - don't blame yourself for hoping. It is not only human, but a beautiful part of being human. You are wise about yourself and your hope was completely legitimate, in my opinion. I know the only thing we can really do is focus our hopes and energy into doing everything we can for the next cycle. (As well as allowing ourselves to just feel whatever we're feeling, of course.) So I think you're looking in the right direction - forward. I don't have a good knowledge of annovulatory cycles so I hope someone else will chime in. And do not ever feel like you need to apologize for venting, that's what we're here for!
I have to add - I am seriously done with doctors who tell young women that because they are young and seem otherwise healthy, they cannot have a health problem. Same thing happened to me and that is the only reason why I'm heading into year three of ttc. Never again - second opinion, third opinion, be pushy, whatever it takes. Ugh!
cbaa, I smiled so big when I read what you wrote - I'm so glad ttc feels good again!
Rebavoo, yay for being into the FET cycle!!!
shesaidboom, IMO it is objectively insensitive (not to mention oversharing) to complain on FB because you did not get pg immediately. I have been on both sides of this fence - I got pg with DS on a second cycle ttc - so I feel I can say this. At that time, I was aware that at least one of my friends was dealing with IF and probably more that I didn't know about. And I was sensitive to that. I don't think people without IF should in any way feel bad or apologetic for their good news. I would never hold it against anyone that they get pg quickly and are overjoyed about it - um, who wouldn't be? Can I understand that it's difficult for someone even with just one month of being disappointed? Of course. However, someone who has zero sense of perspective is being insensitive. I will admit I get a little irritated on the general ttc boards when someone who has been trying for a short time and gets pg says something like, "It was just my time - it was meant to be." What does that say about people with IF? That we don't deserve to get pg? I realize that's not the intention, but frankly that's the logical implication. I don't say anything because it's just not worth it, but it irks me.
So yeah, BFN today and I believe I'm out. I know it's early but my strips are super sensitive. And there's my intuition which is screaming not pregnant. No particular reason, just intuition, FWIW. I'll test tomorrow and Sunday (because the strips are dirt cheap, so why not) but yeah - ready for next cycle. I hope it comes Tuesday as scheduled.