Getting 8yo used to wearing glasses

[straighthaircurly]

My 8yo son gets his new glasses next week. He is very upset that he needs glasses. This whole process has been one giant battle. He fought going to the eye doctor, including throwing a complete tantrum when they put the dilation drops in his eyes (he was screaming and crying at the top of his lungs, "I can't read! I want to read!). The doctor took pity on him and gave him some magnifying glasses that would allow him to read until the drops wore off. Yesterday we went to pick out frames. He was angry and sullen. Usually he is an expert at verbalizing the specifics of what is bothering him, but all he can say is "I don't like glasses." The optician helped us get started and DS gravitated to the flexi-frames that can be twisted without breaking. But he refused to pick out a frame because he didn't like any of them until I said, "Just pick out the frame you hate the least". But he is continuing to "strike out" at me and insisting that he is never going to wear them, going to break them (I have already laid down the consequences for breaking them), etc.

I know from his personality, comments, body language, etc. that he is going to resist ever wearing them. Frankly, I am really only concerned at this point that he wear them in school for board work and his teacher knows he needs glasses. DS is a kid that will relish having adults turn this into a big battle (he loves a good power struggle) so I am looking for ways that other parents have dealt with this situation without creating a power struggle. What has worked with your kid?

[SweetSilver]

There's not much you can do once he leaves the house, so keep that in mind.  My girls don't have glasses, but my sister went through this.  Her eyesight just wasn't bad enough to overcome her reluctance to wear them.  She still doesn't!

[Mummoth]

I'd probably say "If you don't wear them to class I will have the teacher tell you to put them on when she does attendance"... probably not the most mature approach but the threat of having attention drawn to the fact would probably get my DS to cooperate. He would NOT want his class mates asking to see them, what do they look like, why won't he wear them, etc.

DD got glasses when she was 6, and when we went to pick them up, she got a manicure at a nail place and some new hair stuff. She was excited to show off her new look at school... but she wasn't very resistant to having glasses in the first place. Does your DS like getting a hair cut or would he like having a watch? Doing other appearance-related stuff at the same time might help take the impact out of having new glasses.

[prancie]

he may be so blown away at actually being able to see that you won't have any problems

[fritz]

My DS was 5 when he got his first pair of glasses (and he, too, freaked out at the eye drops part of the exam, but it was b/c it was cold and stung for a few seconds), and other than wearing them for a few minutes here and there, they pretty much just sat in their case for the first year.  DH and I reminded him he'd have an easier time reading the subtitles on the TV if he'd put them on, but we left it up to him.  He'd just choose to be closer to the TV.

Finally, around the age of 6, we took him bowling, but before we left, we told him he'd have to wear his glasses at the bowling alley (all 3 of us were wearing our glasses for bowling).  He chose to wear them in the car on the ride over, and he was amazed at all the signs he could read.  After bowling, he opted to take them off, but the next day he chose to wear them for a few hours.  After a week or two, he chose to wear them all day, every day (except for during tap class b/c he'd started taking the class w/o wearing them, and he said it would be too freaky to start wearing them in class).  It's helped reduce his carsickness by a noticeable margin, so we're thrilled.

Last month we sent his frames out to get new lenses.  Before that, I ordered a spare pair of glasses (which he ended up hating so much, he only wore them for 5 minutes to see some hail).  He went 1 1/2 weeks without wearing glasses, but now that we have his old frames back, he's happy to wear them all day again.

If your DS refuses to wear his glasses, can he be moved to the front of the class?  Or is he there already and he still can't see?

[cameragirl]

Originally Posted by prancie 

he may be so blown away at actually being able to see that you won't have any problems

That was the case when I was 10 and needed glasses. The change was dramatic. Is his prescription strong enough that he needs the glasses for more than reading? If so, he'll probably realize after a few days of adjustment that the glasses are a good thing.

[tooraloora]

How bad is his vision? This may work itself out. I was miserable about it when I found out I was getting glasses, but when I actually got them, I put them on during the car ride home and I was blown away at how different everything looked. They were ugly as sin, but I wore them anyways because once I realized what I was missing, I didn't want to give up being able to see.