Okay so my situation is a little weird because we live far apart but aren't officially separated yet. (I'm ready, I just haven't gotten my paperwork, etc. together yet). So the kids don't see their dad much. He asked for us/them to call him every night, which I have been making them do. Yes, making them. They really don't want to. I have tried, "it really means a lot to your father" and "i know if I weren't with you I would loooove to hear your voice." I've done, "tell him one good thing that happened today"; "tell him what you are doing right now." DSs are 10 and 8, DD is 3. They do not want to talk. They just don't. They tell me they will not, but I don't know what to do besides force them. i don't want it to be a negative experience but I am not sure what to do. They will say to him, "hi. i don't want to talk. bye." What do I do with that?
He is upset that they don't want to talk and I don't know what to say. I think they are not at an age that they talk much on the phone anyway. He asked me to make sure the boys don't say they don't wanna talk to him in front of our daughter so that she doesn't start that behavior because of them. But it's already happened. And honestly, it's really hard for me, single momming it, to wrangle two different conversations without having the third child present!!
I am totally at a loss for what the right thing to do is.
I want them to have a good relationship with their father.
Maybe they are vibing my negative feelings, because I sure don't wanna talk to him, but I am trying so hard not to expose them to any of my feelings about their dad. I really don't want to do that thing where you say bad stuff about dad. I want to support them connecting with him, but I have to admit I find it annoying to have to plan a phone call every night to him.
But I am trying hard to make it seem fun or good.
It's just not working.