Warning: Long post
Okay I'm really mad and upset and trying not to cry! I'm way beyond pissed off. Here's how it started:
I found this awesome book called PET by dr. Gordon. As I read it I thought a lot of it pertains to how we live here. We are very AP so we're always against the norm on EVERYTHING and if you came to my house you'd see that.
Anyway there's a couple living on our basement (she's pregnant with twins) she's due on the 15th but is opting to have a cesarian thanks to all the mainstream support around here. So yesterday her mother in law came. She is soooo horrible she makes my mil look like a saint lol. So what happened was that they went to get her and stayed the afternoon out sight seeing since they're not from here. They got home at about 8-ish at night. My kids were both awake but about to go to sleep. She held my baby for a while so I went to put my oldest to sleep. Then when I came back my baby was sort of fighting sleep in her arms because we're getting over the flu and because my dh was in the basement making too much noise. Our dog who is a great sleeper was not sleeping very well either because of the noise.
So then I took my baby back and my dh left to go get some food for us and the conversation begin. The topic: How kids need eight hours of sleep and I'm not disciplining them well enough. They should go to bed at seven the latest and that's it! Also it's important to let them CIO because they need it and crave it! The more discipline you give kids the better off they'll be. Also they should be on a schedule to be fed otherwise he uses my breast as a pacifier.
When my dh got home I was crying. I told him what happened and he was pretty pissed too.
Then to make this even better this morning I was feeding my kids breakfast and my oldest is going through this phase that he's a dog (see my earlier post). Now tell me...Where is it written that what he's doing is wrong??? I put a bowl of cereal for him and let him eat it on the floor. Now I clean my house and my dog gets at least two showers per week. So in walks her and says no then proceeds to tell him as he's crying that he needs to eat on the table. I tell her it's okay it's just a phase and I encourage it. She was like "what"? Then she went on to tell me that it's bad because if I let him do that he'll push all my buttons and he'll become an assassin and end up in jail and all this junk. By then he changed his mind about eating and he's my picky eater. So I was fuming afterwards!
Now, I'm a very laid back person so for instance, I let my kids determine the time they want to go to bed and that's usually around nine nine thirtyish sometimes ten. We also eat a lot on the floor. I'm trying to follow the waldorf method of learning in my home. Of course I don't let them walk all over me, but what makes them think that every child including mine are little helians out there to make our lives crazy? Also when my kids are under other people's care all we (my dh and I) hear is how well behaved they're and they also ask if my baby ever cries (he's nine months).
I'm not saying that the AP method is the only one that works and it's either this or the highway but I wouldn't go visit your house and tell you what you're doing wrong with your kids and what you should do. I'm opening my home to these people and that's how they repay. I just wish I had tougher skin lol. I'm also mad at myself for not standing up to them in my own house. Maybe that'll come with age, I'm 28. My dh is traveling for work now and my mom just moved back to her country so I feel so alone. I'm glad my dh is coming after a week but seriously even a calm person like me can only take so much of this crap! More people are coming and if they're anything like her they'll see another side of me they haven't seen yet. For the love I gave birth to my kids, I suffered so they could be here. I'm THEIR MOTHER not her!!!!
Sorry for the vent and the long post, it's nice to know that I have a place online that I can come for support when I don't really have any irl. If you read this whole post you're an angel.