I'm sorry for all the negative responses, that sucks. I really hope that as the babies arrive, acceptance will be more readily there.....perhaps it doesn't seem quite real yet, being so early into the pregnancies?
For me, I've been fortunate on my side of the family - I mean, my mom has known for a long time that I wanted a 'bigger' family and that we struggled with the decision for one more. I have a very strong sense that her practical belief is that we have it so good as is, and I'm finally at a stage in my life when I can pursue some of my own goals, so her vote would be to stick to the three we have. HOWEVER, she also fully knows that it's not her decision, and as soon as we told her we were pregnant, she was excited for this new life and accepted our decision. For that, I feel very blessed and supported.
Dh's family is a whole other story. They cannot fathom WHY anyone would veer from the 2 kids, 1 dog, white picket fence variety. I think our third was more understandable because we had two girls, and I got a LOT of 'well good, now you've finally gotten your boy so you can be done now' Which in my mind is reason enough to keep on going, he he! But I've always talked about wanting lots of kids, and although I'm at peace with 4, knowing how much negotiating 3 and 4 took between Dh and I, I'm blown away by how SHOCKED his family is with this pregnancy. Not necessarily in a bad way, just speechless, don't know what to say, need a couple of days to recover, shocked! His step mom was the best, but she ALWAYS says inappropriate things and doesn't seem to have a filter from her initial thoughts to her mouth so we've gotten used to it and don't even bother getting offended. Things like, "Oh, are you going to keep it?" and then "Oh, but you just finally lost all your baby fat and are skinny again......."
As for his mom, she's been happy enough about the pregnancy, but I'm realizing how different this experience is going to be now that we live so much closer to her. Every time we talk about the pregnancy she has so many questions about how little testing we're doing, or how safe a home birth is, or what we'll do if this scenario, that scenario, whatever crazy scenario happens. I keep saying I've had 3 healthy pregnancies and successful homebirths so far, I can't imagine choosing to do the hospital/OB route this time. But when we left, Dh and I both commented on how much fear and anxiety we felt around birth at her house, and how we'll have to be aware of this hysteria as things go along. I was so sheltered from it all for the first three.......