For the life of me, I cannot imagine how it is that anyone coming to this thread talking about how we are downplaying risks and telling Kristine that her story "doesn't count for anything" is reading those messages in the posts that have been put up by myself and others thus far.
Nobody on this thread is "protecting a perfect image of danger-less ncb at any and all costs" - we are simply stating the truth....which is:
A sad story told by a mother who believes that something about her birth caused her child to suffer a permanent, serious injury....is really not helpful to anyone who is trying figure out if homebirth is for them, unless the story comes with information that can help us in screening our own midwives or helps us to decide that there are certain situations/positions/variations we are NOT comfortable dealing with at home.
But Kristine didn't do that. I'm really not trying to pick on her at all....I'm merely trying to point out that her first eight or ten posts after joining this forum recently, were almost ALL in the homebirth forum and ALL almost exactly the same. Interjecting in conversations that were not asking for sad stories at all (but were asking for information on certain things, one woman asking for help in calming her nerves).....and saying(paraphrasing):
"I wouldn't homebirth if I were you. My son is permanently disabled because I chose to homebirth him, biggest mistake I ever made"
Then, on the thread of a woman who had been trying desperately to figure out how she was going to make her HBAC happen after she realized the midwives she originally chose were crappy....she was trying to get this figured out, birth professionals were trying to give her options and piece the whole thing together...it's the kind of thread that makes me happy to be a part of MDC....where a woman can come and people will help her figure out safe ways to make the birth she chooses to have, possible.
One midwife offered to help her and said that if she would be willing to travel, they could put together a hotel birth....something a lot of women in different situations find themselves having to consider. But Kristine thinks that is gross. So she said(direct quote):
"That sounds INCREDIBLY unsanitary. I really hope you are joking."
She is not here to support. She is not here to be helpful. She is not here for any other reason, than she is hurt and angry. She has been making the same post over and over again.....NO information, NO facts......just "My baby was posterior, I chose homebirth, he has CP, don't give birth at home". <-- not freaking helpful. Not okay, per the Homebirth TOU. Period.
Originally Posted by KmAndrews
Posterior was NOT the cause . . . it was just information. I am not sure why that is confusing people. I repeat Posterior was NOT the cause. Never said it was.
Really? I'm confused:
Originally Posted by KmAndrews
My son was posterior, the midwives brushed it off. It was a very long traumatic birth. He was injured and asphyxiated and now has to spend his life crippled by Cerebral Palsy. www.weareabel.org I am obviously extremely concerned about the safety of midwifery and would give anything to go back and have a C section. A little bit of discomfort is no comparison to the lifetime of struggle that faces my son.
Multiple times you have posted that piece of information......that piece of information ALONE.....as if it was somehow a cause of your sons injury.
Again, I'm not trying to pick on you and I AM completely sympathetic to your sitaution and heartbroken for you, as everyone else is, that things took this turn in your life. But do you understand how what you are doing, the way you are posting about this, is not helpful? You say you want to protect other women from your fate...well, you can't do that if you dont have information.
Knowledge is power. Fear is crippling. Filling people with knowledge, is filling people with the power to choose wisely. Filling people with fear and sadness does not empower them.
Anyway. I'm getting the feeling that poeple aren't even reading posts anymore. I honestly don't know how anyone could think that anyone here is trying to ignore the dangers that can visit you in birth or pretend that it's all roses. No one has done or said anything like that here.
As for those of you who have stated that you've "done your research" and "honestly are not coming into contact with stories like Kristines or any kind of cautionary stories at all" - I would humbly and gently suggest, that you need to revisit the definition of research. In the research I did and continue to do over the last five years of my pregnant/birthing/mothering life.....I have had to WADE THROUGH negative stories...at certain points ignoring whole websites, chapters of books and topics of conversation with people IRL, because I was too close to my birthing time to let things like that into my space. I have absolutely no idea how ANYONE who is doing actual, in depth research on the merits of home vs. hospital birth and birth safety in general, can possibly be ignorant to the vast ocean of birth horror stories and "things that can go wrong" on the web, in books and in anecdotal situations in real life. That is shocking to me and, honestly, makes me more concerned than anything else on this thread.