how often do you offer the potty?

[girlspn]

my LO is 3 months old, and I've just begun EC with her. I actually tried when she was around 2-3 weeks when I noticed she would pee during diaper change, but her head was very wobbly and she would scream every time I held her in potty position... that was so stressful I gave up. 

Now she has more head control and she actually likes to sit, it's much easier to position her. Unfortunately, I am no longer able to tell when she's going to pee. Poops are easier-- she fusses during nursing, but pees seems to be random, I can't see any signals. I We use cloth diaper without cover, so I change her about 12-15 times a day, usually she doesn't sit in a wet/soiled diaper longer than a few minutes. But still I can't see any pattern to the pees, and I hardly catch her in the act of doing so, so not sure how to do cuing.

The potty position is also new for her... when I hold her over the basin for too long, she fusses.

Now I think maybe I should offer the potty more often? And how long do you hold your LO over the potty? 

Any advice?

[babygirlie]

joke?

Children biologically have little to NO control until they are 2 and a half years old

[somegirl99]

At that age they do pee a lot!

Couple things to try:

- Do you wear her?  I found that pee signals were far more obvious when wearing.

- Try some diaper free time, just let her hang out lying on a prefold (so much easier before they get mobile).  This gives you a chance to observe her and also a chance to cue her.  This will help with figuring out signals (at that age my DS had a subtle squirm before he peed) and patterns.

I also found that it was useful to have a clock near the potty to make sure I didn't hold him on it too long.  He pooped a lot (several times a day) so we would usually do a max of 5 minutes (more if he was still pooping) but for pees I would probably do 2-3 minutes.  If he fussed I would take him off.  At that age he wasn't too interested in toys on the potty (plus I needed my hands free to hold him) so I mostly sang silly songs to him to entertain him on the potty.

[somegirl99]

Originally Posted by babygirlie 

joke?

Children biologically have little to NO control until they are 2 and a half years old

Not a joke.  Not sure why you are hanging out in the EC (elimination communication) forum if you know nothing about it.  At 1 year old my son can hold pee for up to 4 hours and let us know before he has to go.  This is the method used by traditional cultures around the globe, whose kids are potty trained far earlier than in the US, where parents train their kids to use diapers and lose the awareness of their bodily functions that they were born with.  Do some reading up before knocking it.

[kfillmore]

Originally Posted by babygirlie 

joke?

Children biologically have little to NO control until they are 2 and a half years old

THAT is BALONEY!
 

Anyway, to Azhie- I used to just space out all the time so I used to set the timer on my watch. First I would have her naked on the floor on matts and get an awareness of how long between peeing. It was usually (when that young) every 20 minutes. It was good this way too because I could still use intuition but have it backed up with a timer. BTW my DD is 21/2 and I am SOOOOO happy we stuck with ECing!!

Oh, also, this will help with cuing because she will be lying there naked and you can cue when you see pee coming out. 

I personally do not remember time on the potty as being a question. I think that I just waited a very short time. It will happen faster (!) once baby is responding to your cuing her.

[girlspn]

I don't always wear her (dh isn't convinced it's good for her...), but I carry her a lot, and she squirms. I always thought it is because she's uncomfortable and want to face out. Hmm, maybe it's because she wants to pee. 

I will try giving her some diaper-free time and see how it goes. She always manages to pee whenever I step out for a few minutes!! 

Now I can catch almost all poops, but short of sitting over a basin for half an hour, I can't imagine how to catch the pees. She usually pees sometime within the hour of pooping. I guess I am not that patient to just wait... 

Originally Posted by somegirl99 

At that age they do pee a lot!

Couple things to try:

- Do you wear her?  I found that pee signals were far more obvious when wearing.

- Try some diaper free time, just let her hang out lying on a prefold (so much easier before they get mobile).  This gives you a chance to observe her and also a chance to cue her.  This will help with figuring out signals (at that age my DS had a subtle squirm before he peed) and patterns.

I also found that it was useful to have a clock near the potty to make sure I didn't hold him on it too long.  He pooped a lot (several times a day) so we would usually do a max of 5 minutes (more if he was still pooping) but for pees I would probably do 2-3 minutes.  If he fussed I would take him off.  At that age he wasn't too interested in toys on the potty (plus I needed my hands free to hold him) so I mostly sang silly songs to him to entertain him on the potty.

[girlspn]

Wow, that's great and so encouraging! 

I do wonder sometimes whether a baby as young as some months old can really hold their pee and poop? 
 

  At 1 year old my son can hold pee for up to 4 hours and let us know before he has to go.  This is the method used by traditional cultures around the globe, whose kids are potty trained far earlier than in the US, where parents train their kids to use diapers and lose the awareness of their bodily functions that they were born with.  

[girlspn]

Every 20 minutes!! Actually, now that you mention it, that does make sense. I haven't been diligent enough to observe her that oftne. I get the sense I always miss her actual peeing by a minute or two. The timer idea is a good idea... 

How much time do you spend EC-ing? When I first started a few days ago, I felt like it was a lot of effort. But I get encouraged when we do catch some thing. I also figured out a more comfortable way to position my dd so she doesn't fuss. 

Originally Posted by kfillmore 

Anyway, to Azhie- I used to just space out all the time so I used to set the timer on my watch. First I would have her naked on the floor on matts and get an awareness of how long between peeing. It was usually (when that young) every 20 minutes. It was good this way too because I could still use intuition but have it backed up with a timer. BTW my DD is 21/2 and I am SOOOOO happy we stuck with ECing!!

Oh, also, this will help with cuing because she will be lying there naked and you can cue when you see pee coming out. 

I personally do not remember time on the potty as being a question. I think that I just waited a very short time. It will happen faster (!) once baby is responding to your cuing her.

[AliceMay]

very much second diaper free time. When I committed to that more I started catching a lot more pees. 

Also thought I would mention that sometimes it is worth giving a pee opportunity even if you notice she is wet - sometimes, they stop peeing once they feel wet, and do several small pees, instead of a big one on the pot! 

Also, how often you offer may change based on tie of day and nursing pattern. My LO pees A LOT in the morning but they are more spaced out during the afternoon. 

[girlspn]

I caught two little pees yesterday! But then the big pees came later, and I still missed 10 pees, lol. I pottyed her every hour or so yesterday but nothing happened most of the time. 

For cuing-- do you cue WHILE baby is eliminating, or while on the potty? Do you wait for baby to go, or cue until baby goes? 

[somegirl99]

2 catches is great!

What I would do myself is put baby on the potty and cue briefly, then wait, and then as baby goes, cue again.

[girlspn]

Sadly, I can no longer just lie her on top of a prefold-- she rolls around too much! I put her on a mat. 

The timer idea is working so far. I've been offering the potty every half an hour or so, and she peed almost every single time. Albeit only small pees, but still!!
 

Originally Posted by somegirl99 

At that age they do pee a lot!

Couple things to try:

- Do you wear her?  I found that pee signals were far more obvious when wearing.

- Try some diaper free time, just let her hang out lying on a prefold (so much easier before they get mobile).  This gives you a chance to observe her and also a chance to cue her.  This will help with figuring out signals (at that age my DS had a subtle squirm before he peed) and patterns.

I also found that it was useful to have a clock near the potty to make sure I didn't hold him on it too long.  He pooped a lot (several times a day) so we would usually do a max of 5 minutes (more if he was still pooping) but for pees I would probably do 2-3 minutes.  If he fussed I would take him off.  At that age he wasn't too interested in toys on the potty (plus I needed my hands free to hold him) so I mostly sang silly songs to him to entertain him on the potty.

[kfillmore]

you asked about cuing. The idea behind cuing is that if you cue WHILE they are pee THEN they will associate it with going. I think it is like Pavlov's dogs, ha ha. That is the beneift of being naked you can SEE even if you are not "catching" it, so you can cue. I think you want to wait to cue before she pees until she learns to associate the signal.

[Deepfeet]

Just going to pipe in about the "little to NO control of their bladder" nonsense.

When my DS was 4 months old, he would start to pee on the floor and I would squeal "nooooOO!! " He would stop peeing - startled but smiling, we would rush to the toilet, I would cue, and he would pee, big grin, big sigh.

Our misses are mostly half misses : )

[isabchi]

Originally Posted by Deepfeet 

Just going to pipe in about the "little to NO control of their bladder" nonsense.

When my DS was 4 months old, he would start to pee on the floor and I would squeal "nooooOO!! " He would stop peeing - startled but smiling, we would rush to the toilet, I would cue, and he would pee, big grin, big sigh.

Our misses are mostly half misses : )

Absolutly!...All babies in their early day cues before they going to eliminate. I been seen in many non EC babies that uses diapers. After a while in diapers with non response of their parents, babies stopped cues. Communications in two ways directions. If nobody answer after many, many calls, ... of course, they have to stop making calls. We forget that babies can't talk, but they can communicate with body languages, sounds, etc.

[girlspn]

I think my dd associates being butt-naked and over the potty with eliminating. Not so much my verbal cues... 
 

Originally Posted by kfillmore 

you asked about cuing. The idea behind cuing is that if you cue WHILE they are pee THEN they will associate it with going. I think it is like Pavlov's dogs, ha ha. That is the beneift of being naked you can SEE even if you are not "catching" it, so you can cue. I think you want to wait to cue before she pees until she learns to associate the signal.

[girlspn]

It's true! When my baby is nursing and needs to go, she'll stop, look at me, and fuss a little. If I ignore her and just put her back on the breast, which is what I've always done, she'll just poop right there. But since starting EC, so far every time she stops nursing and looks at me, it's because she has to pee or poop, and we've caught them all. I'm amazed at how consistent she is and how I went 3 months without picking her signals up. 
 

Originally Posted by isabchi 

Absolutly!...All babies in their early day cues before they going to eliminate. I been seen in many non EC babies that uses diapers. After a while in diapers with non response of their parents, babies stopped cues. Communications in two ways directions. If nobody answer after many, many calls, ... of course, they have to stop making calls. We forget that babies can't talk, but they can communicate with body languages, sounds, etc.

[HawaiianBlesing]

Originally Posted by azhie 

Wow, that's great and so encouraging! 

I do wonder sometimes whether a baby as young as some months old can really hold their pee and poop?  

My son can go 3-4 hours at night at the age of just 2 months.  He's been doing this quite regularly.  When he wakes to nurse, I check him and so often he is dry.  We've gone several nights in his short time of ECing without changing a diaper.  Now I just wish he could do that during the day lol.  I know he is way too young and like the rest he pees about every 20-30 min.
 

[nachipmunks]

Pees are harder to catch but watch closely and you will notice that she will get quiet before peeing and when done goes back to her regular activity. Also they pee on schedule...mine goes about every 2 hours. I can't say how much I love EC method.

[girlspn]

I wish mine would pee on schedule! She pees every 30 minutes or so during the daytime. At night, she only pees once or twice at most as well. And she doesn't pee while asleep-- it's during periods of waking.

I'm pretty sure she could hold her pees and poops, at least for a few minutes, because once she starts fussing, we always make it to the basin, where she eliminates promptly. It's pretty amazing-- I was skeptical when I started, but I love it now. 

Many thanks to everyone's comments on here! :)