"Safe" posting of kid's pictures online? What is "safe"? xposted in TAO - Page 2

[mkksmom]

I can speak to the issue of how to decide when 2 parents disagree on a safety issue. My dh is a computer engineer, and his passion is internet safety. He doesn't want pics posted on FB. I would like to but respect his opinion. We kind of have a general rule that safety wins. When we disagree, we just go with the safest option.

[Imakcerka]

Ok web designers, you can design away. I would consider myself an ethical hacker... There are flaws in everything! Why would they need to patch so many of them every week? Everything can be hacked. If someone really wanted your information, they could get it no matter how hard you tried to get rid of it or hide it. I know how they do it and how well they know how to do it. In my honest opinion, there is no such thing as privacy on the internet. More and more people are learning how easy it is, there are so much freeware out there that will crack passwords. You can find updated directions to do just about everything. When you think you have it safe... YOU DON'T.

People want to share their pictures and their thoughts and their daily happenings. Social sites exploit peoples need to be "out" there. Look ooh and awe over my kids pouring spaghetti on their heads. Look at me, I'm on vacation. Did you see my new car? How great do I look on the beach in my bikini? Behind their monitors they have a little more courage. They put things out there, they probably wouldn't normally do if face to face with over half of their super close 550 FB friends. However most people don't care about that. Who would other than granny and gramps. As far as thinking you have safeguarded to the hilt and only your closest 550 FB friends will ever see your precious babies... think again.

A couple of years ago Google allowed you to search things from their archives. 10 years prior to be exact. Look at PIPL... I love that one. I can find the lay out of someones house that used to be on the market. Great... now I know your windows are higher off the ground than I anticipated. People who want information about you can find it. So if you're concerned about the safety of pictures... really? At this point I don't care anymore. God only knows what I have out there.

Just stop saying there is any real safety with the internet.

[mkksmom]

Originally Posted by Imakcerka 

Ok web designers, you can design away. I would consider myself an ethical hacker... There are flaws in everything! Why would they need to patch so many of them every week? Everything can be hacked. If someone really wanted your information, they could get it no matter how hard you tried to get rid of it or hide it. I know how they do it and how well they know how to do it. In my honest opinion, there is no such thing as privacy on the internet. More and more people are learning how easy it is, there are so much freeware out there that will crack passwords. You can find updated directions to do just about everything. When you think you have it safe... YOU DON'T.

People want to share their pictures and their thoughts and their daily happenings. Social sites exploit peoples need to be "out" there. Look ooh and awe over my kids pouring spaghetti on their heads. Look at me, I'm on vacation. Did you see my new car? How great do I look on the beach in my bikini? Behind their monitors they have a little more courage. They put things out there, they probably wouldn't normally do if face to face with over half of their super close 550 FB friends. However most people don't care about that. Who would other than granny and gramps. As far as thinking you have safeguarded to the hilt and only your closest 550 FB friends will ever see your precious babies... think again.

A couple of years ago Google allowed you to search things from their archives. 10 years prior to be exact. Look at PIPL... I love that one. I can find the lay out of someones house that used to be on the market. Great... now I know your windows are higher off the ground than I anticipated. People who want information about you can find it. So if you're concerned about the safety of pictures... really? At this point I don't care anymore. God only knows what I have out there.

Just stop saying there is any real safety with the internet.

This is pretty much what my dh says too. There is no safety on the internet. Even the secure ID's that have changing passwords to get into the sites can be compromised.

[Imakcerka]

By the way PIPL is not the one you go to view homes, it's zillow I believe and as of 6 months ago they changed that feature, No you can only view homes that are currently on the market. However before that... I could see that my neighbor has a smaller kitchen than I expected... I like the wall colors too.

[Eclipsepearl]

I do have a friend whose pictures of her children were stolen. She is a semi-professional photographer so we're talking quality pictures, high resolution. Kiddie porn it was not. One was a book promotion (innocent theme, self-help kind of thing) and the other was amusingly being sold as a screen saver in Japan... Luckily, Getty takes over and she didn't have to go after them herself. 

She now makes the files smaller and puts a water mark on them. If anyone remembers National Lampoon's European Vacation will be reminded of what happened when their cam corder was stolen (and that movie was before the web lol!)

Here's where I have an issue. One of my daughters is a competitive rhythmic gymnast. Not sure if especially you N. Americans even know this sport but it's with balls, hoops, ribbons and clubs (no beams, horse, etc. like the other kind of gymnastics). Basically, it's dance with some gymnastic moves, especially splits... They wear costumes that are similar to ice skating attire, but even skimpier. Photographers are crawling all over the place and basically we've been told that if we don't agree to cameras, our kids can't do the sport. She is very tall for her age, with black hair and green eyes. Photographers seem to gravitate towards her. Recently, a promo for the club was sent out to potential sponsors (we need them!) and there must have been four pictures of my kid in it. Recently we had our annual local fair and sure enough, in a video montage for all the sports in the region, there she was again...

I'm happy to have such a pretty, photogenic dd but I'm not totally comfortable with this situation. We do live in a pretty safe area though, and our house is alarmed and our details unlisted. I've had to compromise my misgivings about her image being so public against her pleasure in her sport.

I thought I'd share this since many of you have younger children. If this is important to you, and it's valid to not take my more relaxed attitude, you may need to be selective in what sports or other activities your child participates in and reflect on this ahead of time. Easier to stop them from doing theater than to pull your child out of an upcoming production. 

But basically, it's going to be more and more difficult to protect your child's image, if that's what you want to do. With so many pictures of so many children out there on the web, I just hope those of my children are not selected for and "unsavory" purposes. Or if, g-d forbid they are, that she'll never hear or know of it!

[mamazee]

My reasons for bbeing OK with it, as the OP said she's interested: There are a quadrillion pictures of kids on the internet. My pictures of my kids aren't that interesting to rise out of that sea in any spectacular way. If anyone copies the pictures, I'll never know, and I don't see how it makes a difference in our world. But my kids' grandparents all live very far away, and Facebook is how they find out what they're up to. The pictures mean a great deal to them, and having them easily shared and putting up the status updates all all the other Facebook stuff is important to them. Their interest is greater to me than fears of people I don't know looking at the pictures. Are there sickos out in the world? Of course, but I don't change how I live my life out of fear of sickos. Most people are nice people like my kids' grandparents, who want to see pictures of their grandkids and see what they're up to.

Yes I could email them or whatever but I find Facebook easier and I like it so that's what I do and what I will continue to do.

[cameragirl]

When my sister was 16 (about 20 years ago) some creed was taking pictures of girls and pasted their heads on pictures of naked bodies. Creeps and child porn collectors don't need the internet. Sure makes things easier, but it doesn't stop it. Unfortunately there are risks in everything.

[intrepidmother]

Originally Posted by magnoliasmama 

 My point was that the internet does not necessarily store information forever. The information is controlled by the owner of the server. If you post to social networking sites, you are storing your information in their databases.

This is exactly why I DON'T trust FB.  They have your photos in their database.  People are trusting a social networking site to keep their pictures safe and private.  Big mistake, in my opinion, as FB continually adjusts its privacy controls.  If you read the most recent controversy wiith FB, you'll learn that FB now tracks the websites (using cookies) where you visit after you log out of FB so they can target you with advertisements.   They change their privacy rules all. the. time.  I'm surprised that so many people are comfortable and confident posting pics online.

Then again, maybe I'm just being paranoid 

[MeTooMama]

Originally Posted by cameragirl 

I recommend NOT using the high res upload option on Facebook. Use the older version that will compress your images some. If you use the high res service, Facebook can use your images for advertising and assumes the rights. I also do not use any cards for my dslr that have geotracking available. Nobody needs to know exactly where I took that image, especially since I do sell stock images.

I didn't know that they could do that! I will not be clicking THAT box from now on! I really don't post up that many pics of the kids anymore because I am lazy anymore but I take a ton. My wall is plastered with old pics of the kids.

[mamaecho]

My whole thing has always been (and I've been active on the internet since I was 12, so 14 or so years) if some creeper wants pics of my kids, why not just head to the mall, walmart, the playground, etc and take some pictures? I'd probably never know. I don't worry about putting pictures of my kids online simply because of that.. if someone is going to get off to my kids pics, they could easily do the same in real life, yet I don't stay in my house at all times in fear of it.

There's a way to be safer (but obviously, not 100 percent safe) on the internet, and I'm okay with that.

[Eclipsepearl]

I agree but tips like the high res. on FB are easy to apply. Especially for those who live far from friends and family, FB, blogs, etc. are the way to keep them in the loop with what's going on. It's a risk I'm willing to take.

I also told my kids, don't ever let anyone take any pictures of you in a compromised position, undressed, leaning over, whatever. 

I just have to be zen about the gymnastics. Each competition has hundreds of girls and I just pray mine doesn't attract the wrong attention...

[Calliope84]

Originally Posted by Imakcerka 

Ok web designers, you can design away. I would consider myself an ethical hacker... There are flaws in everything! Why would they need to patch so many of them every week? Everything can be hacked. If someone really wanted your information, they could get it no matter how hard you tried to get rid of it or hide it. I know how they do it and how well they know how to do it. In my honest opinion, there is no such thing as privacy on the internet. More and more people are learning how easy it is, there are so much freeware out there that will crack passwords. You can find updated directions to do just about everything. When you think you have it safe... YOU DON'T.
People want to share their pictures and their thoughts and their daily happenings. Social sites exploit peoples need to be "out" there. Look ooh and awe over my kids pouring spaghetti on their heads. Look at me, I'm on vacation. Did you see my new car? How great do I look on the beach in my bikini? Behind their monitors they have a little more courage. They put things out there, they probably wouldn't normally do if face to face with over half of their super close 550 FB friends. However most people don't care about that. Who would other than granny and gramps. As far as thinking you have safeguarded to the hilt and only your closest 550 FB friends will ever see your precious babies... think again.
A couple of years ago Google allowed you to search things from their archives. 10 years prior to be exact. Look at PIPL... I love that one. I can find the lay out of someones house that used to be on the market. Great... now I know your windows are higher off the ground than I anticipated. People who want information about you can find it. So if you're concerned about the safety of pictures... really? At this point I don't care anymore. God only knows what I have out there.
Just stop saying there is any real safety with the internet.

Exactly. And I'm rather handy with google myself. If I wanted to, I could find out who some of you are just by reading your past posts, looking for related screen names and e-mails and using whatever "innocent" info you've shared on these forums yourself. I could probably find your fb page and even if you have it marked as private, I will have your real name. I could find out an awful lot in just a half an hour.

I do share photos of my daughter. I know lots of mamas who blog and share photos of their families. I do this on my blog and websites. I need images for my sites and I'm sharing my experience with my readers. I think seeing pictures to back up what I'm saying and shows that I'm an honest trustworthy source (not easy to tell on the internet, obviously.)

I do not post any nude pictures of my daughter or anything, though. But really... There are billions of people and children out there. I'm just a person living my life just like everyone else. I have kids just like a lot of people. I'm not rich or famous...If some weirdo wants to manipulate images I took, he/she can go for it. There are millions of photos to choose from already on the internet. 

I've read before that kidnappings and such haven't actually gone up in the last 20 years, but we all feel like they have. We all are afraid our children will be targeted. Most of the time someone you know well does this stuff, though. It usually isn't a random stranger. We just hear about all the exceptions on the national news. I don't know how to phrase this without sounding rude but... None of us are so "special" that people are going to start targeting us for whatever nefarious purposes if we put our info out there once in awhile. Even if you never go on the internet, you can still google yourself and likely find something.

That said, I have a separate business address, but if you own a home anyone can search your name in the property appraisal website for your county and find your address! I don't use foursquare or publicize my immediate whereabouts usually, either.

[Calliope84]

Originally Posted by mamaecho 

My whole thing has always been (and I've been active on the internet since I was 12, so 14 or so years) if some creeper wants pics of my kids, why not just head to the mall, walmart, the playground, etc and take some pictures? I'd probably never know. I don't worry about putting pictures of my kids online simply because of that.. if someone is going to get off to my kids pics, they could easily do the same in real life, yet I don't stay in my house at all times in fear of it.

There's a way to be safer (but obviously, not 100 percent safe) on the internet, and I'm okay with that.

Ha. Good point. I'm sure creepers prefer playgrounds anyway. 

And I agree you can't change your whole life based on fears you might have. You do what you can and that's that. If pictures online really bother some moms, they can just refrain from putting them up.

[Polliwog]

I'm comfortable posting pictures on FB and do on a regular basis. I don't have 500 friends, nor do I care to have 500 friends. I occasionally post pictures on message boards but not often enough that someone's going to find them and use them for a nefarious purpose.

[Eclipsepearl]

Does anyone know of any concrete examples of photos of children being used? I'm not so sure how much of this is "urban legend" out there. 

[Polliwog]

I used to post on a message board where lots of pictures are posted. One member was taking a house tour and saw another member's daughter's picture in a frame on the wall. Apparently it had been purchased as a stock picture. I don't remember the details but I saw pictures of the framed picture.

It still doesn't bother me, though.

[intrepidmother]

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/technology/digital-culture/ivor-tossell/facebooks-photo-tagging-tweaks-rig-the-game-against-privacy/article2191666/

maybe not related to using pics of kids, but interesting none-the-less...