REALLY late AF...who wants to wait with me?

[kenyasolovely]

Just wanted to start a thread for those who (like me) are officially LATE for AF and either haven't tested yet or tested and got a BFN and are still holding out *hope*

Today I am on CD38

Soooooo....that being said I am not 9-10 days late since my cycle is usually 28-30 days on the head.  I took a at 5 days late and it was NEGATIVE!  I am not convinced I'm pregnant now as a result of that!

I did however have a horrible bladder infection and did use a very diluted urine specimen. My BFF seems to think I really might be pregnant...so does DP. I have no pregnancy symptoms other than my boobs are huge (but not even sore), feeling hot and sweaty, horrible runny nose. Also I have no PMS which for me is more unusual than being late, I always get PMS very badly, I actually suffer from PMDD and my mood has been awesome! I'm shocked at myself at how calm and relaxed I am.

So if anyone else wants to wait it out with me....I guess we can do so here.

[Jaimee]

Sounds like your ovulation was delayed.  What test did you use?  Good luck with the wait!  FX!

[kenyasolovely]

Hi Jaimee, thanks for the response. Weirdly enough I keep telling myself it has to be anything but pregnancy that's got things on hold. I don't really have any sxs and that neg. test REALLY was like the nail in the coffin. But my BFF keeps reminding me it ain't ova til it's ova!

I've been NTNP for almost 4 years, had a tubal reversal in 2007 (September) and only have one good tube thats open.

I used the Family Dollar brand of test.

[Jaimee]

Well, dollar store tests are usually pretty sensitive- needing an hCG level of 25- but the real question is, how many days after ovulation were you when you tested?  I know you said you were NTNP, but are you leaning more toward TTC?  If so, I would highly recommend charting to pinpoint ovulation better and take the mystery out of when to expect AF.  If you're interested in charting, just post for more help!

[happy2bamama]

Hey there - I am basically in the same boat as you and it's driving me NUTS!  I am on CD31 and I'm usually 27-28 days.  About 5 days ago, I started having really sore boobs (especially my nipples, sorry TMI) and when I hug people, it noticeably hurts.  I even try to talk myself out of thinking I'm pregnant and then bam, I hug someone and it kills.  I also have heartburn after everything I eat, this empty hungry feeling all the time and I have lots of whitish cervical fluid (TMI again, sorry).  So, I *feel* like I am pregnant, but I have taken three tests and they have all been negative.  I'm even taking the First Response Early Response ones that supposedly pick it up quicker, but it's a total negative without even a faint second line.  I know that time will tell, but it's really hard to be in this middle ground.  And I feel for you being on CD 38!  I feel like I talk myself in and out of being pregnant all day depending on what I'm feeling.  I am hoping to be pregnant, but at this point, I just wanna know SOMETHING!  

I do feel like there's a chance I ovulated late this month.  I had a really strange ovulation (not my normal fertile fluid), so I don't really know when it happened, but yesterday, I got this acute cramping and then a bit later when I went to the bathroom, there was a glob of fluid with a tiny bit of brown in it, which made me think maybe that was the implantation and I'm a week or so off.  That would make sense as to why tests have been negative.

Best wishes to you during this loooooooooooooong wait - you're not alone :)

[kenyasolovely]

Jaimee - Well I'm definatly not ready for TTC. The charting and such is not what I'm willing to dedicate just yet, since it has been four years since my tubal reversal. I initially went into it very hard-core and got my heart broken, month after month, for over a year straight before I finally put down the BBT thermometer and walked away. I do realize in situations like this however; how charting can be beneficial and I think that if I'm NOT pregnant this time up, I will start with charting because I don't want to keep having long cycles like this and would need to know if I'm ovulating.

Happy2bamama - Hi there and welcome to the wait!!!!! Your sxs sound so promising and much more than mine. I had some headaches about 3-4 days late, fatigue for about 2-3 days, now I have insomnia. My boobs are GINORMOUS   (I quoted that directly from DP's mouth, btw! ) and they ache, which normal PMS for me is burning/tingling and super sore nipples. But I know how sneaky that  can be so I'm not gonna test again until I am 2 weeks late, which will be Friday. I feel ya about the "talking myself in and out of it". Because I'm having no real symptoms and don't feel PG at all...I keep saying I'm not and the witch will find me sooner or later. But then other days....I just play around with the idea that I am...and I LOVE every minute of it. I figure I might as well because there's a 50% chance I am, which for someone who's has not been using Birth Control at all for four years, those are the highest odds I've had! :) When are you testing again?

[happy2bamama]

Well, it sounds like your symptoms might be slowly coming on with those "ginormous" boobs!!  I know what you mean about that sneaky &*%^$!  I actually went to the dollar store today and bought three tests (I still can't believe the Dollar store sells pregnancy tests).  And now I know why they're a dollar - because you have to pee in a cup and then use a dropper!  So, I gave in and tested today after yoga and again, it was negative.  Not even any sort of faint line.  This limbo is just killing me - all my symptoms are still there - I even woke up in the middle of the night last night to pee and had hunger pangs that made me want to make myself something to eat at 1am.  I am trying to accept this place of "not-knowing" because I know it can't go on forever, but it's not easy.  I went to yoga today for some distraction, clarity and hoping that if AF is on her way, doing some deep pelvic stretching would help her speed it up (put me out of my misery).  I've have some light brown sticky mucus, only sometimes when I wipe, and that is confusing too because it could be pregnancy spotting or it could be AF on her way, but honestly, it doesn't feel like AF.  But what do I know at this point - all I do know is that I have burning sore boobs and nipples and no explanation!!  At this point, even though I want to be pregnant, I just want to have some stability, so even if AF comes, at least it will be an answer and then I can go about my merry way :)  I am impressed that you are going to wait to test until you're two weeks late - hang in there!  I was Googling "I feel like I'm pregnant, but the test is negative" and I found all sorts of chat boards and women who had all these stories about HPTs and also doc PTs not giving them a positive until they were like 6 weeks - 2 months along.  I feel like that is such a rarity, but it *can* happen.  Hang in there and talk to you soon!  

[kenyasolovely]

Awww! ((HUGGS))

I wouldn't say AF is coming your sxs sound GREAT! and very, very promising! I got my test from the Family Dollar, I suppose they are sensitive. My BFF said she didn't get her positive until she was about 2 weeks late, she only had lower back ache and swollen boobies, but she knew something wasn't right. And I've taken the ones at Dollar Tree, they are so "cute" in a primitive sort of way  but hey as long as they get the job done and give out BFP's I'm all down for it. Today I had horrible nausea it went away when I ate though so I'm gonna see how I feel tonight. I stayed home from work today I'm just in a funk all the way around....feel run-down and crappy.

Yoga sounds so nice right now. We have a family membership at the Y and they offer classes. I've never taken one but I've always wanted to. I said if I was pregnant I would definatly start, I heard it can be very beneficial! Just hold on and remember what they say it is not over until the fat lady sings...I think you're going to definatly get your BFP. My fingers and toesies are crossed

[happy2bamama]

Thanks for all the love :)  And right back at cha too!

The Dollar Tree tests are totally primative!  But I'm with ya, for a dollar, they're awesome.  And they alleviate that "I just spent $10 for nothing!" guilt for when we break down and have to test.  I still haven't tested with FMU.  Perhaps if and when I test next I should do it the "right way."  Comforting to hear about your friend not getting her BFP until 2 weeks late!  I am trying my best to put this out of my mind and just go about my day and life.  I'm feeling like even if AF is due, perhaps all this wonder and worry is prohibiting her from coming.  Would love to step out of my body for a few days!

Baby dust to you 

[kenyasolovely]

How are we feeling today??

***WARNING: RANT***

I'm now 12dpo...more symptoms BUT doing more "reading" online which is not helping me I think that's stressing me out. I keep reading all these post from women who tested late which gives me this ridiculous sense of "hope" when I tested at 5 days late and it was NEGATIVE, which mathmatically means that I'm pretty much not pregnant. So now I'm waiting, meanwhile I'm miserable. It would be so bad if I were just late with no sxs. My uterus is crampy and feels like its about to fall out everytime I get up and walk. My nose keeps running and I keep getting sores (sorry tmi) on the inside. I got into the most heated arguement with DP last night because wouldn't watch GIA (a movie about a supermodel) with me!!!!   I mean really, how childish is that.

I got this super headache this morning, I'm crampy, tired and today is just not a good day. I feel I've been playing it way cool for the past 11 days, not spazzing out or anything. But today....enough is enough! I'm so over it.

Sorry I had to rant....I'm on the point of breaking down right now

[happy2bamama]

Awww, hugs   I know, the internet can be a blessing and a curse.  I talked to a midwife last night and she suggested getting a blood test to see my hcg and progesterone levels so that at least I'd have some information.  There's not necessarily anything to do either way, but at least I would know something.  I was torn about if I wanted to do that because what I really wanted to do was get it out of my head and not stress about it (or get any tests).  But nature saved me the trouble because AF showed up this morning in full force.  I'm actually happy to see her and happy to have a clean slate and be able to go about my life!  But, last night when I still wasn't sure what was going on, I was thinking that if I was a week to 10 days overdue on my period and still a BFN, I would maybe have my blood tested for my own peace of mind.

I'm a little confused because I still have some of the preggo symptoms, but instead of going back through everything and thinking "What happened there?" or "Why did I feel like that?" I'm gonna move forward and think about something else for a change!!

Hang in there, although I know it's not easy.  Hopefully you will get some info soon :)

[kenyasolovely]

I think we both might have had an anovulatory cycle. Thanks for coming back with the updates to me that is important because a lot of women don't update what happens and you're reading and then next thing you know you never know what happened.

Well the night before last I was getting out of the shower feeling rather awesome and notice clear as day, Montgomery Tubercles on my nipples. I was like "OH YEA!!!" because the only time I've ever had them is when I've been pregnant with my sons. Now I'm pretty dark skinned and they stand out because they look like white pimples against my dark chocolate so I know I wasn't imagining them. For the first time in four years I finally accepted the fact that this "might be it". I might actually get my BFP. I mean I wasn't cramping, my UTI was finally gone, I still had the huge boobs....and had a headache the entire day so I was really feeling quite confident.

Took a test yesterday. BFN. Then I started spotting.

So woke up this morning. Still spotting. No flow. Light cramps last night, now nothing. I can't count this as AF, because in an anovulatory cycle you just spot with estrogen break-through bleeding, which pisses me off even more because now I don't know what to expect. I am STILL having preggo symptoms, my boobs still ache, I still just overall....don't feel good. So the anovulatory cycle means I'm going to continue with this hormonal imbalance until my body decides it wants to re-set itself.

When I took that test yesterday and it was negative AFTER seeing those MT on my breast...needless to say I went completely OFF....I was about 1 foot away from a complete psychiatric breakdown. And I KNOW something is very very wrong here. (I was diagnosed with Crohns this year in May and been sick since 2008...knew something was wrong people kept shrugging me off...til my second hospitalization they finally found the Crohns. I feel the same way now...somthing is seriously wrong) but... I can't figure it out and I'm going to have to let it go and move on because I don't have the insurance to follow up on this. I had a doctors appointment today for a blood test, I'm not even going to go. I just can't bear another "negative" right now. I'm tired of talking about it, obsessing about it.

I went out last night and had the biggest Margarita I could find and this weekend, DP (who is quite possible the worlds most WONDERFUL LOVING MAN...I've ever met he is just a sweet potatoe) said it was all about me, I could rest and relax....he's gonna cook, clean and do whatever I want. He knows this has been hard on me physically...and not its taken an emotional toll as well.

I would definately suggest us both move on and continue to be there for each other. You didn't tell me how long you've been TTC? Also what route are you going from here? I'm debating if I want to take a holistic approach or traditional meds. I REALLY think I want to go holistic, with the yoga, acupunture, vitamines, etc.

[Jaimee]

Originally Posted by kenyasolovely 
I'm now 12dpo...more symptoms BUT doing more "reading" online which is not helping me I think that's stressing me out. I keep reading all these post from women who tested late which gives me this ridiculous sense of "hope" when I tested at 5 days late and it was NEGATIVE, which mathmatically means that I'm pretty much not pregnant.
 

This was two days ago... how were you calculating that you were 12 DPO on Wednesday?  I thought you were past the time of expected AF?  Did you pinpoint an O day better?  If you were only 12 DPO on Wednesday and therefore only 13 DPO yesterday then a BFN is not so conclusive.  Yes, normally women will get accurate results on HPT's around 12-14 DPO, but late implantation can cause later BFP's.  Also, some embryos simply produce lower levels of hCG and some women do not metabolize hCG into their urine very quickly.  Spotting around the time of expected AF is not at all uncommon.  So there would still be hope, especially with the latest symptoms you're describing.  I would suggest waiting 2-3 days to see if the spotting turns into a full flow and if not, test again.

I'm sorry this has been so difficult for you.  I know you said you weren't ready to commit to charting, but charting is not just for TTC.  It will also shed light on what is happening in your body that is affecting your cycles.  It will help you decide what steps make the most sense to take next (meds, herbs, other supplements, diet changes, etc.).  It will also provide valuable information to a doctor if you decide to go that route.  And lastly, it will prevent another cycle like this one where you're emotionally and physically exhausted from the not knowing.  You could start as soon as you get full red flow whether it's a period or not.  Just a thought.    Hope you get your answer soon!

[happy2bamama]

Hi again!  Sorry I'm just getting back to you.  How did it turn out?  Was it really AF?  All those symptoms play such games with the mind.  I don't know about you, but once AF is over and things are back to normal, I almost cannot even fathom how I got to the crazy, obsessing place.  It feels so good to be just living and not thinking about TTC, but that TWW has a way of making us crazy!

I had quite the intense AF.  I bled for three more days than normal.  Not sure what happened this cycle.  For me, rather than think of all the possible things that it could've been, I'm just enjoying not thinking about it!  I have no idea if I actually ovulated or not.

So, I have an almost 5-year-old son.  It took us 18 months to TTC with him.  That was a such a lesson for me in every single way.  It actually got me started on the path I am on now which is supporting pregnant women and moms (I'm a childbirth educator).  It has been so strange for me to be back in TTC land almost 6 years later!  I am a completely different person now and so I am trying to be mindful of how I want to navigate this since I have no idea how long it will take us and I learned lots of ways not to do it the first time around.  It is easy to fall back into old patterns (obsessing and controlling), but I feel like I'm doing a good job at it (aside from last month).  I don't really know when we "started TTC" - probably a few months ago.  I haven't wanted to make it such a destination or something that has officially "started" and it being watched and strategized (unlike last time around).  I am trying to have the attitude of not doing things to try to make it happen (like if I'm not in the mood for sex, I don't force myself to do it even if I'm ovulating) because the first time around I found that if I did things that were supposed to help with fertility, then I expected them to work and was then disappointed each month.  This time, I want to go about my life and of course, in a healthy way, but I don't want to be doing TTC things, per se.  I don't chart my cycle.  I did it for four months while TTC with my son and although it made me feel like I had some control, it actually made me more obsessed about it because every morning, TTC would be the first thing on my brain since I had to take my temperature.  I knew when I ovulated and what my fluid was like, so after 4 months, I ditched it and never looked back.  But I agree with the PP that it could be a helpful tool to figure out what's going on if that's what you're looking for.  For me, the less things to give me a false sense of control, the better :)

Although, having said that, there was a book that I found at the end of our TTC journey last time called "The Infertility Cure" by Randine Lewis and I found it immensely helpful.  It's a Traditional Chinese Medicine take on fertility.  It talks about ki imbalance, acupuncture, acupressure, herbs, etc.  I bought it again (I loaned my other copy out) and read parts of it and have been doing two things that I remember making a difference the last time around - acupressure and I'm drinking some Ginseng tea (which helps with where my ki is off balance).  The way I'm looking at it is that I want to balance my body and hope that this helps, not strictly I want to get pregnant.  I'm looking at it as a whole rather than just an end goal - or at least I'm trying to :)  Those are my two little "TTC tasks" and I also accept that just because I do them doesn't mean that I will get pregnant, so I'm trying to not have any expectations.  It's enough to feel like I'm being proactive (who knows if that even matters) but not obsessing.  I also feel a lot more calm this time around.  I'm not in a big rush and I trust it will happen when it's supposed to.  I think I'm in a lot happier of a place this time around, so I don't feel like I need this "thing" so desperately.  I have a lot of wonderful things going on in my life and I'm grateful.

Also, I just wanted to pass this along to you - during my first TTC journey, I did interviews with various other women TTC and compiled a book and then website out of it.  You can check it out at www.tlcforttc.com if you're interested.  It provided me with such a connection to a community that I didn't have since no one talks about this stuff in real life.

I hope you're doing well - would love to hear how it's going :)