post #41 of 41
10/1/11 at 8:17am


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by pianojazzgirl View Post

Mama, I gently suggest that at this time you might have to push dh a bit.  Hand him ds (freshly nursed and dry-diapered) and *leave the house* with dd.  Go for a 20 min walk.  Whatever.  You need to start *taking* that time (not asking, not expecting him to offer).  The more time he spends caring for ds the more comfortable he will become.  Then it will be less of an issue.  Right now things are working just fine for your dh - there is no motivation for him to upset the status quo.  But there *is* motivation for you (having time for yourself, having one-on-one time with dd) and I think you are going to have to be the one to make sure that it happens.

 


 

Yes, this. 

 

I started off with the assumption that DH was going to do stuff.    Starting from the first week home, I would nurse baby, hand him over to DH, and take a solid 20-30 minutes to myself getting ready for the day -- showering etc.   Doesn't seem like much, but it built DH's comfort level with the whole thing.     But I went into it with the basic idea being that I had a *right* to do it, that it was perfectly natural that a baby's father could handle things for 30 minutes at a stretch.   

 

 

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