Extremely good points, fille. I have wondered the same thing, but I haven't thought about it in a while due to the distractions of ttc. I thought about what it might be like to use the format used on "The L Word" (Mama B, Mama T), but I wonder if that's too much like "Mom 1 and Mom 2." Also, our initials don't roll off the tongue as well as theirs. I called my mom "Mommy" as a little kid but switched to "Mom" when I was still pretty young - definitely less than 10.
With regard to your question about what other people do, my only knowledge of another couple's mom-names is a sad one: the kids called the non-bio mom "auntie," and I believe this was to avoid discrimination/violence when the kids were growing up in the 1970s and 80s. I don't know if the adult kids still call her that. Fortunately, that's not really necessary today.
If/when I conceive, I don't know what I and my wife will be called, but I want us both to be Mom! What about using the English "mum"? Seems like a possibility, because you would hear the difference within your family, but outsiders would pretty much hear it as "mom."
Quote:
Originally Posted by
fillefantome 
I have a question for the mommy/mama pairs:
My mother was Mommy when I was little, which became Mom when I was older, and I find it easy to say "my mom always said/did/...." So, to me, mom is a noun that can be used to replace mother in conversations with people unfamiliar with your family structure, where a less "mainstream" (at least in the U.S.) version like Ima, MeMe, even Mama, sounds odd to me in this context (as though they are names rather than nouns?). You could say to your best friend "my ima says..." but you mightn't say that to someone you just met, because they might not know what relationship you are referencing, or it might sound like too childish a name.
I really like Mama, and have considered using it when I have kids (I may be doing it on my own, which would simplify the initial decision). But, I have trouble picturing my teenager or adult child calling me Mama. If I'm the only parent, I would consider Mama->Mom to be a pretty natural progression, but what if you are a two-mother family, what are the "grown-up" versions of your titles. Anyone have any experience with this, or noticed what lesbian couples with older kids around you have done?
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