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My son is not vaccinated and I live in fear because of it.

post #1 of 13
Thread Starter 

Not in fear of him getting sick, although I do worry every time I am confronted about it what I would do if he did get sick. I am scared of his doctors, and mostly CPS. Seriously, EVERY time I have to take him to the doctor for a checkup all I can think of for the next two weeks is that CPS is going to knock on my door. I don't know what to do about it and I am pretty sure this is going to give me grey hairs.

post #2 of 13

Does the doctor give you any reason to worry, by what he says? If so, it's time to find a new doctor who will respect your right as a parent to decline vaccines.

post #3 of 13

Yeah, you need to find a Dr who doesn't push vaccines.

post #4 of 13

How old is your child? Do you just have one? I ask because it truly does get easier with time.

I fretted a lot with #1, but once she got past a year old, and by the time #2 was born, I was much more relaxed about it. I still HATE going to the doctor (which is why we don't go very often), but I think that's normal when you go against the grain.

 

I find that going to forums like this, and having daily vax information on FB via groups like: https://www.facebook.com/TheRefusers and https://www.facebook.com/national.vaccine.information.center  

really helps keep me educated on the subject and remind me that I'm not alone.

post #5 of 13
I agree, it gets easier to relax when you have more than one or have been doing it for a while longer. I was lucky that when I first ran out of insurance I didn't take my daughter in because she never got sick and then by the time I got insurance again I had already picked up enough books to decide not to vax. I worry now because everyone here is so pro-vax in my neighborhood and they freak out when you're not a vaxer so my kids don't get many playdate invites.
post #6 of 13

It's not illegal to allow your child's healthy immune system to function properly, as it was designed. No one can force you to vaccinate your child without a court order, and those are very rare and limited to extremely specific circumstances. Do you have any reason to believe you're at risk for being reported to CPS, or is it merely because your child is vaccine-free? Barring other reasons to suspect abuse or neglect, CPS isn't going to investigate you simply because you exercise informed consent as your child's guardian.

 

Keep your child's medical information private. You don't have to give a complete summary to every Nosy Parker who wants it--not even medical practitioners have a "right" to know. My favorite vague answer to the question, "Has he had all his vaccines?" or "Is he up to date on his shots?" is "He's had all the shots he needs." He doesn't need any shots, so it's not an untrue statement. wink1.gif

 

I know it can be scary to swim against the current and I don't mean to invalidate your fears and concerns. But living in fear is miserable and very unhealthy and I bet if you research vaccine laws more closely, you'll get some peace of mind. It really does get easier with time. hug.gif

post #7 of 13

I agree with pea in the pod.  Basically, nobody knows my child's non-vaxed status.  It's personal medical information and no one's business.  Vaxes don't come up alot, but I ususally just smile and nod. 

 

I wouold seriously consider getting a new doc and you may want to consider the need for well baby visits.  Why give the doc the opportunity to yell at you for not vaxing?  IME, vaxes only come up at well child visits, at sick child visits, vaxes don't come up. 

 

Good luck.  It'll be ok. 

post #8 of 13
Thread Starter 

I mostly worry because we live in Illinois now and it seems like they are just CPS happy around here. There is no real reason for CPS to be called. Our baby is healthy and our house is clean. Sometimes I don't get to the dinner dishes until the next day and my laundry piles up until the weekend, but I am pretty sure that happens in everyone's house at some point or another. I think I am just super paranoid and his pediatrician is very negative about the vaccines. I would like to switch, but I have limited choices as to who will take Tricare insurance, and haven't heard of any around here that are non-vax friendly.

post #9 of 13

You don't have to see a pediatrician, nor do you have to do well baby visits if you don't want to. Our first pediatrician, who is very pro-vax, told me explicitly that well baby visits more than once a year are strictly to administer vaccines. She encouraged me not to schedule them if we weren't vaxing.

 

Now we see a GP and it's much more laid-back in general. I don't take them in unless they have symptoms. Weight, height, and other measurements can be done at home.

 

Whatever you do, don't stay with someone who literally has you living in fear. It's worth not going back there even if it means having to see a general practitioner IMO. You don't have to be afraid. hug.gif

post #10 of 13

Good for you for being brave enough to take on all the naysay about antivax and still choosing not to. I have done the same but I give you kudos. I am naturally highstrung and I had my first child one year ago. Not only is he not vaxed but I get very STRUNG when he get sick. Mind you it's only been twice so that's good but he come down with a viral ear infection that caused a VERY high temp. I was a mental case and I so commend mothers that are strong and don't lose it when that happens. I am a worry wart. I need some help in that department. Don't be afraid. I agree with the previous posters.  ; )

post #11 of 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katarianna View Post

I mostly worry because we live in Illinois now and it seems like they are just CPS happy around here. There is no real reason for CPS to be called. Our baby is healthy and our house is clean. Sometimes I don't get to the dinner dishes until the next day and my laundry piles up until the weekend, but I am pretty sure that happens in everyone's house at some point or another. I think I am just super paranoid and his pediatrician is very negative about the vaccines. I would like to switch, but I have limited choices as to who will take Tricare insurance, and haven't heard of any around here that are non-vax friendly.


 

It is illegal to investigate you because of not vaccinating for religious reasons (which will be your reason if you plan to stay non vax and use public schools), as long as you do "well visits" you have proof against medical neglect. Illinois changed the law like 10 years ago to stop people from reporting people for not vaccinating. cann't find the source right on, but found the following on an old thread .

Gov. Ryan signed into law SB 1305, which removes the Department of Children and Family Services' regulation of medical neglect for parents who choose to delay vaccination, fail or refuse to vaccinate their children based on medical or religious exemptions....With SB 1305, doctors are free to advocate different vaccination schedules than recommended by medical societies for developmental issues or minor illnesses without writing a medical exemption....[From the amendment:] "A child shall not be considered neglected or abused for the sole reason that the child's parent or other person responsible for the child's welfare failed to vaccinate, delayed vaccination, or refused vaccination for the child due to a waiver on religious or medical grounds as permitted by the law."...

 
post #12 of 13

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Edited by member234098 - 5/29/12 at 8:20am
post #13 of 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by miriam View Post

Be proud.

 

‎"Here's to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes, the ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can't do is ignore them because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, are the ones who do." -Steve Jobs

 

You are in good company.

 

 


 

Too bad Steve didn't take his own advice when it came to his health. But when you feel you are facing death, it is very easy to give in to the fear of the majority.

 

OP: 

F = false

E = evidence

A = appearing 

R = real

 

Dig deep and examine what you are really afraid of.

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