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Expecting our RAINBOW babies - graduates of "hoping, healing & conceiving again" tread 2011 - Page 25

post #481 of 514

Hi all!  wave.gif  I took a short break from the boards in general, and I haven't been lurking on here much either.  I just now finished catching up, from something like page 21.  Sheesh!


I know it's kind of late, but I wanted to make a comment about measurements...  All of my babies, DS and the twins, consistently measured a week ahead on every single ultrasound.  I O on day 10 -12, plus I have short cycles (about 24 - 25 days), so there wasn't much margin for my dates to be off.  I mean, I couldn't very well have conceived while I was on my period, before I even ovulated!  I really wouldn't put much stock in the measurements being "off" by a few days, or even as much as a week, so long as the baby is growing.  Babies are all different sizes when born, so they are also all different sizes when they are embryos/fetuses.  DS was 9 lbs 7 oz, so by the end I was measuring almost 2 weeks "ahead" - and if my midwife hadn't trusted me to know my dates, she would have assumed I had conceived earlier and moved up my due date because of it, possibl;y leading to an induction by a normal OB - but he was just a big baby (and he was born 1 day after his EDD).  Averages are just that: an average.  So for every baby that measures a week "ahead", there are also babies who measure a week "behind"... and both are fine.  Add in tech error, machine calibration, and all the other variables, and I think that a dating ultrasound is kind of silly unless you have NO IDEA when you conceived. 


We use all of this technology - beta draws, ultrasounds, etc - for reassurance, but it only ends up stressing us out more because we are looking for concrete answers.  But growing a baby is a miracle.  It doesn't always conform to what "should" be, according to the medical world.  Granted, we've all seen the sad side of this, when our babies died for no reason or from a freak occurrence.  But there's a flip side as well: many mamas have been told that their baby would die, or be born with horrible birth defects, but ended up giving birth to a normal, living child. 


Remember to see the positive. Don't give up hope.  You are all holding little miracles inside of you!  luxlove.gif

post #482 of 514

Haven't posted much, but gotta post this.  I think I finally feel "safe".  As safe as I can feel, anyway, until I'm actually holding the baby.


We had an u/s on Thurs, at 21 weeks, and saw an active, healthy baby (girl!!!!).  Everything looks good, no concerns at all, and now I'm feeling her move a lot more as well.  Hadn't been feeling any big kicks, and the u/s showed why--the placenta covers the entire top of the uterus and down the sides a little.  So all I was getting was general wiggles and head and hand movements.


Anyway, I'm just happy.  We've reached the halfway point and everything looks fantastic.  That is reassuring.

post #483 of 514

Snadaska- Great to see you on here and that the amnio went well! Yay, a girl! Do you have a name picked out yet?


CountryMouse- Have you heard anything yet? How are you?


RaineyDay- How are you?


MAnna- How are you feeling? Are your girly parts feeling better?


Gem- How are you? I'm glad you pop in on here to say hello and offer encouragement:) I hope you join VERY soon!!!!


Zub- I'm sorry for all the stress in your life right now. Hugs to you:)


AFM- I'm still feeling pretty bad nausea, which is okay. I felt like this with DD until around 11-12 weeks. I've lost 6 lbs, but I'm sure I'll make up for it soon:) I have my next u/s this coming week on Friday Nov 4th, I should be almost 10 weeks at that point. FX that the growth is still on track and the heartbeat is still good:)



post #484 of 514

I had more energy yesterday and don't feel sick this morning. I'm afraid the baby died. There's no way for me to find out one way or another for a few weeks (unless I start bleeding but it took 3 weeks last time...)

post #485 of 514

MAnna, I'm sorry you are feeling this way.  I'm hoping you are having a normal lull in symptoms. (I haven't really had any symptoms yet!)


I woke from a dream this morning in which I was in the bathroom and wiped blood.  It too me a few minutes to realize that it wasn't real when I woke up.  Then I got in a mini-fight with dh, when he didn't respond very sensitively to my feelings.  He doesn't seem to realize how constant I think about having another m/c.


So I should be 5 weeks today.  Other than some fullness in my breasts, I'm not really feeling symptoms. When did some symptoms kick in for you ladies?



Yay for Girls, Snadaska and Cappucino!

post #486 of 514

The nausea started around 6 weeks.

post #487 of 514

(((((hugs))))) to those of you worrying about another loss. hug2.gif

3surfboys, I had a horrible, horrible miscarriage dream a few weeks ago.  They suck.   I'm so sorry you had one as well. :(  And the dream-dh wasn't sympathetic, so I woke up mad at him. sigh.  It stinks that the "innocence" is gone from pregnancy for us.  There's always that fear in the background.

post #488 of 514

HI everyone,


Oooh, a girl! So happy for you, S!


And, Cappuccion... a girl, too! Yes, that is super exciting, and also so glad that you're feeling more confident.


Diana, you're a star to come and see us/. I read the TTC board all the time and have fingers crossed for you. And, Gem, you too. Damn your appointment not being soon; just seems so unfair.


MAnna, I feel EXACTLY the same. Sure that the baby has died and I just won't know about it for weeks.... It's hard to live like this. Sending so many hugs.


3surfboys. I did feel queasy before my BFP but proper, full-on nausea didn;t start until just before 6 weeks. Ugh, horrible dreams are the pits. Sending sticky vibes.


AM: I am really at my limit. I am so sick even on full strength zofran. My weight tends to really hold steady and adjust to any excess/depletion, so I was surprised to find that I've lost at least 7 pounds since the beginning of October. I went to the Dr;s today because I am just not really able to function. I saw a different Dr who was really nice. he actually just called me to remind me that if the new meds he prescribed don't work, that I need to go to the ER for some IVs. Oof, what a time. This would be so much easier to deal with if I felt confident that this was a viable pregnancy. I'm also just having a hard time with my dad's hospitalization. A lot of stress in our house, right now.


Anyway, to try and create something to look forward to, I'm looking to book a vacation for Spring break. I said to DH that it will either be our last vacation with just DS, or it'll be a 'getting over baby loss' vacation. Frankly, if I did lose this baby then we're going to have to wait a long while to try again. I'm totally drained emotionally and physically.


Well, that was a happy update!

post #489 of 514

Zub: Big, big hugs to you. That is so much at once. I wish you had some concrete reassurance (like turning your stomach into an ultrasound screen so you could look down and check all the time - wouldn't that be great?) Bless your heart. I wish I could just come sit with you (and maybe help you with your house or something).


Laura: I was good and solidly worried that I didn't really have any symptoms yet at your point too. I was sure that I'd have a blighted ovum or something. I wasn't especially tired and didn't really have any nausea at ALL until I was 6 weeks on the dot. It was very sudden. I did have to pee all the time but that's grown less since my fundus has popped out over the pubic bone and made room. I'd be freaking out about that too but I know that's just normal progression and I get it earlier because I'm all "stretched out" and measure ahead. I'm sure you'll be green and wobbly very soon. (: Oh, and the vivid dreams are a common pregnancy symptom. I get them too and they can be dreadful. I just had one this afternoon and it was a miscarriage one. Like, I was holding the tiny casket. OK, enough.


Congrats, cappuccino and snadaska on your girls! I have had a feeling I have a girl too.


Stacey, sorry you're sick but glad everything is ok otherwise!


Diana and Gem - we love having you pop in. It's so, so sweet of you to check in on us. And I hope you'll both be here very soon.


AFM: I started getting some sudden, obvious waves of nausea around to to the point that I had to hold my hand over my mouth, take slow, deep breaths and think "mind over matter" or I'd throw up. (: DH was very happy for me. [Don't we all live such upside down lives?? I'm feeling vaguely nauseated as I type and am delighted.] He took me out to Sonic a little while after that and I surprised myself by ordering one of the sandwiches, eating all of it, and polishing off a watermelon slushie. Then I came home and fell asleep reading and took a 2 hour nap. I know that nothing is certain, but earlier this morning it all seemed to be certain doom. At least I'm back to a normal level of worry (DH calls it "level yellow", lol.). Thank you for your concern ladies. (:



post #490 of 514

3 surfboys- My nausea also started 6 weeks on the dot.  


Zubeldia- Hope the new medication works. Good choice to plan a spring vacation.  I have also been completely ill and have lost weight.  I have been unable to function.  My mother in law came up to help for Halloween weekend.  I actually left the house today, took a zofran.  It helped this time.  The zofran wasn't doing much except for keeping me from throwing up.  At this point, I am just throwing up in the morning but feeling like absolute crap the rest of the time.  


I did get preliminary results from my last blood test and it looks like the antibodies are from the rhogam that I had after the miscarriage.  It's been 15.5 weeks since the miscarriage and the rhogam lasts between 12-15 weeks. So I'm just squeekin in.  


Before my ultrasound on Wednesday, I told my husband that I was pretty sure that the baby died and to gear up for not seeing a heart beat.  That afternoon I felt ok, a slight energy burst, plus I had the spotting for 4 days.  But the baby didn't die!  


These babies could make it!  -thecountrymouse

post #491 of 514

Hi mamas! I'm sorry everyone is feeling so yuck, but I guess it can also be seen as good news at the same time! Although I really hated the first trimester this time around, I was somewhat glad to have a reminder that things were probably going well if I felt so raunchy all the time.


countrymouse - so if the antibodies are from the rhogam, does that mean you can stop worrying about your body fighting the baby? Oh, I sure do hope so! That must've been so stressful waiting for preliminary results. I'm glad the zofran helped you to have a somewhat normal day.


MAnna - are you still having yeasty problems? I second the suggestion for apple cider vinegar. It hurts like hell, but it takes care of the urge to scratch for a while. I used a peri bottle and sprayed myself with it several times a day. Not pleasant, but it cleared up my problems without medication. Sorry you had such a bad feeling this morning, and glad that feeling came back to make you feel better. First trimester roller coaster is just no fun at all.


zub - I'm sorry you have such big feelings of impending doom still. This pregnancy certainly sounds like it is mirroring your pregnancy with your little guy so far, so I think you are going to be having that baby in your arms come June! I'm sorry your dad is still in the hospital, how scary. I guess this changes their plans to come and stay with you for a month? Hoping he gets well soon so you have one less thing to worry about.


3surfboys - I had nausea pretty quickly, but it wasn't so much full on until 5-5.5 weeks. My breasts were super sore this time around though, from the beginning. And they grew quite big quickly, and honestly they were already big enough for me! I've had some doozy dreams this time around myself, not fun at all.


Congrats on the girls to Snadaska and Cappucinnosmom. I'm glad everything else is going well for both of you as well.


diana - good to "see" you, and I really love what you said. Growing a baby is a miracle. :) Hope you can join us soon!


RaineyDaye - hope your appt Tuesday goes well and you get over all those illnesses soon. Tis the season I guess. Feel better!


slshoe - glad you got through party day at your daughter's school. It sounds like everything is going really quite well for you as well. 10 weeks on Friday, that is so great!


I really like Gem's idea to have a new thread every month, we are already up to page 25. I also have a suggestion to move the thread to the PAL board, simply because it is a little more private than this "I'm Pregnant" board. Just a thought.


AFM - I have been feeling pretty good. Energetic, and feeling lots of movement. I will sometimes go through the day and not feel the baby at all and get a feeling of dread. I guess even with feeling the baby moving around, that thought of impending doom doesn't go away so quickly. Most days I feel pretty confident, but I still have my moments. I went to a party and told a few friends last week, but most of my friends still don't know I'm pregnant. I'm barely showing at this point, if I wear big clothes and not fitted clothes I just look like I've gained a lot of weight. Spent the last couple days at our new house, and it just reminds me of how I can't wait to be home for good. I think the kids and I are going to go home for good sometime later this week, and my hubby will finish up things here. There isn't much left to be done, so we should have our house listed soon! I never realized what a headache selling a house could be, and I guess I haven't even really entered the headache period yet of the hurry up and wait for someone to actually BUY it.


Thinking of you all.

post #492 of 514

Hi everyone. I have had time to check in but not much time to post. And, of course, now is not the time to do all the personals, as I have to be out of the house in 45 minutes and haven't showered yet...yike.


In any case, I'm thinking of all of you guys. MAnna - quickly - try to hang in there. I know all so well the worry but I'm glad the nausea returned (can't believe I typed that, but it's fitting for now). Zub - you too, with the worry. I hope your dad is out of hospital soon.


loveandlight - envious of your new house! I'm getting house envy, and it's kind of silly, I like our place - but it's small (ish). And, we owe more on the mortgage now than what it's worth - ah the joys of buying during the housing boom. All we can do is keep paying on time and hope for a turnaround...also, I'm already popping out a bit, can hide it too - but it's hard. We've been reluctant to tell people too - I actually am finding it easier to tell people I don't know that well than others. It's weird.


countrymouse - glad you got out of the house! The severe nausea sounds horrible.  You too, zubeldia. Wow.


3surfboys - still so excited you are here.


AFM - just quickly, because I have to go - I don't have much. I had a minor breakdown this past week, and can tell I'm depressed. It's sinking in that I will have spent roughly two YEARS pregnant. A little break in between, but no baby yet to show for it. Still don't think a living baby is the end result of this. DH is far more positive, and although it's helpful, sometimes I just want to shake him - say, "you KNOW what can happen! Are you nuts??!" And, the cemetery is still giving me the run-around for DS2's gravestone - we've been waiting for the proof to approve the stone for weeks now! It's nuts. Anyway, the depression/distraction is really affecting my focus - can't seem to work on my jewelry design, haven't even made it to the studio - I'm trying to go this afternoon. Not to mention other artistic projects. The day job is wearing me down too.Sigh. Don't want to be such a downer.


As for the pregnancy (because, that's what this board is about, ha) - the good news for me is the nausea has calmed down. Still flares up, but not nearly as bad as before. So, there's a light at the end of the first trimester/beginning of second. I think I finished 16 weeks today. Potentially 23/24 to go...that seems SO FAR. No appointment until the 11th. Also, I definitely decided against a home doppler because I know myself - it would make me absolutely nutty. I just have to try to find a way to trust this pregnancy. Not sure how to do that yet, but I'm working on it.


Anyway, I hope everyone's day before Halloween is a good one - I have to see my mom, make cupcakes, and then go do some metalwork in the studio. Not to mention everyday chores.  Eek! I'll try to at least lurk.


One more thing - I agree with Gem's suggestion of a monthly thread. I also agree with the idea of moving to the PAL board for the privacy factor. I don't think we've revealed anything too personal really I guess, but it would be nice - that's just my gut reaction. CorgI? What do you think?



post #493 of 514

Felt good yesterday, freaked out this morning from some red spotting (but we DTD last night), and am doing a little better this afternoon. Bone wearying tired and still a bit fuzzy-headed from the cold which is finally almost gone...but I am feeling a bit better. Happy when I feel nauseated, a bit nervous when not...but there's enough nausea coming and going to keep me from freaking out TOO much. 


I'm exactly eight weeks along today (at least till I get a dating estimate from the sono...but I'm going off of my LMP). Just a little less than two days till I have my "meet and greet" appointment with the midwife group and hopefully get a real appointment set up then (as long as they don't scare me away, I'm pretty sure we'll go with them). I am anxious to get my levels checked and get an early sono (even if it's extra out of pocket since the midwife fee only covers one sono)...but I'm not really wanting to do the sono till I'm at ten weeks (just cause of the sonos for Paisley happening at eight and nine weeks and it brings back bad memories). 


My sister and a friend who lives in the area are both due five days after me. My sis isn't even 21 yet and her little boy is still a little over a week away from turning one!! My friend is the one I've mentioned before who was pregnant the same time I was with Bug but lost the baby and then had to deal with health issues for over two years before they could TTC again...and they are finally pregnant now. I am so hoping both of their little beans as well as my little bean all make it and arrive healthy and happy next June!!

post #494 of 514

So what is everyone doing for Halloween? Since we aren't huge on Halloween anyway, and now have to deal with Bug's peanut allergy we are just dressing up, setting up a little table outside with peanut-free candy on it...and passing out candy and visiting with whatever neighbors stop by while trick or treating. 


Bug is going to be a pirate. I have a little costume that was kind of cheesy that I modified a little bit to look slightly less cheesy and I found him a sword. No hat, but I think his messy spiky hair looks quite dashing for a "gentleman pirate"!! My husband and I already had pirate stuff that we wore four years ago to a pirate weekend at a renaissance faire...so as long as I find and wash the pants that I wear with it (and said pants don't dig in too tightly to my eight week belly) then we will be a family of pirates!!


At the store this morning I had a little more spotting, so I am going to try to take it easy even with the Halloween stuff. All I need to do still is find and wash my pirate pants and get the candy dumped into the bucket we'll be passing it out from. DH is bringing a table home from work and then he'll have to put the tablecloth on it and dig out our camp chairs...and I think wash some mud off his boots...and then we are good to go.


I'm really trying not to psych myself out too much with the spotting. Today's spotting was brown and stringy, so it's probably just left over from the little bit of red spotting yesterday (and it probably all goes back to DTD on Saturday night). DH isn't as worried but even he said that we should figure out other options in the bedroom for the next little while...and I am SO okay with that!!


Tomorrow is my meet and greet with the midwives...hoping to get the ball rolling ASAP after that as far as checking out how this little bean is actually doing. The uncertainty is unnerving!!

post #495 of 514
Today is a bit of a busy day. We were planning on carving pumpkins last night, but had a birthday party for my nephew and niece so it didn't happen. DH got DD's school done early today, so they're carving pumpkins now. Then lunch, then a trip to the chiropractor, then getting DD's costume on, and trick or treating. We live in a little neighborhood, so we usually go around it once, and call it a night for the trick or treating.

I'm mostly looking forward to the chiropractor. My belly is HUGE this time, and I'm getting pretty bad sacroiliac joint pain. Not sure what else to do for it aside from heat and adjustments.
post #496 of 514
Thread Starter 

Good day all!


Does anyone want to be thread keeper for November?


Anything else is going fine.  i went for my first scan today bouncy.gif

Was very nice, measured 9 weeks 2 days, that is right on line with what I was thinking, but Dr said my due date is 5th June 2012.  heart beat looks super, but she didn't say what it was ( I know,  should have asked) but the baby was so cute, wriggling around so much that she struggled to take the measurements!  All else was good, and DH was with me as well.  


I am in two minds if I should go for the 13week chromasomal screening?  My Dr does not think it really neccesarry but is happy to refer me.  I am 28 an have no family history.  what do you think?


here the little Halloween cake I made my kids...

Haloween cake2.JPG

post #497 of 514

Corgi- Great News!!! Congrats on the great u/s!! Love the cute pumpkin cake as well. What type of icing did you make? Did you use marzipan? As for the nuchal screening, I think it's really just a personal choice. I didn't do it with DD because I didn't have any reason to, but I am with this one just because of my history of extreme recurrent miscarriage, speculation that ALL my losses were due to random chromosomal issues and the fact that we know for sure that it was the case with one that we had karyotyped, so for me, it's almost neccessary. I have a friend who has never had any issues or anything and chooses to have the nuchal screening just by choice. So, I would say it's up to you, will it make you feel better to know that they are ruling out several chromosomal issues (it's not just downs syndrome..the test rules out  triplody and several trisomies..I think I spelled that wrong..) or if it's not a concern I wouldn't bother with it. Also not all insurances will cover it either, so that my be another factor. I hope I didn't confuse you even more:)


RaineyDay- You halloween plan sound great! Have fun:) How was your "meet and greet"?


AFM- Not much going on here. Just carving pumpkins and going trick or treating with my peacock fairy princess and some of her friends:)




post #498 of 514
Corgi - I think it depends on what you would do with the information. I'm the same age and don't have a family history, so I choose to decline the tests. I know that no family history doesn't mean that something can't happen, but I just don't want to worry the entire time about a false positive. I knew that we wouldn't choose to terminate in the vast majority of circumstances, so for us, it was an easy choice. For those that might choose to terminate, the tests can help them to make a decision earlier than later.
post #499 of 514

Camera- The nuchal screening also rules out conditions like triplody that is not compatible with life, so it's not just about choosing to terminate or not..it would prepare you for losing your baby at birth or during your pregnancy. I lost a baby due to triplody. I waited until the heart stopped, but I also knew that the baby would not live. I don't want to sound harsh, simply educate. Also some of the trisomies are not compatible with life either.

post #500 of 514
Originally Posted by slshoe128 View Post

Camera- The nuchal screening also rules out conditions like triplody that is not compatible with life, so it's not just about choosing to terminate or not..it would prepare you for losing your baby at birth or during your pregnancy. I lost a baby due to triplody. I waited until the heart stopped, but I also knew that the baby would not live. I don't want to sound harsh, simply educate. Also some of the trisomies are not compatible with life either.

I'm sorry for your loss, slshoe128. I understand that with genetics, age and family history may make have nothing to do with it. Sometimes things just happen. I actually don't have an issue with the nuchal scan. It is much more accurate when you do a quad screen with ultrasound. My issue is more with the older triple screen without u/s, since it produces a LOT of false positives. I understand why many would want to have that time to prepare, though. It really is a situation where each mother/parent needs to think about their personal beliefs, family history, etc., and go from there.
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