DH/DP Babywearing « Back to Group Discussions

[kylaskye]

So DH is fine with me wearing the baby, but he seems like he would rather use the stroller/carseat.

I want a woven wrap for when Liam is older, but he doesn't want to spend the money on it. He says we have the sling and the bjorn (which I really don't want to use.) I tried showing him how it's more versatile and can be used when he's a bit older, too, but he won't hear any of it. We even have gift money that we would be using for it, so it isn't like it'd be cutting into the food or bill money.

Any suggestions to convince him? I'm even planning on getting one of the cheaper ones (~$85 vs 120+) because his aversion to the cost.

[Baby_Cakes]

My DH is the same way.  He prefers a stroller, or a structured carrier.  I have no advice to help you convince your DP unfortunately...but what about if you spent the money on a SSC like a Boba for when Liam is older?  Would your DH wear that?  DH loves ours and maybe that's a good compromise for you guys?

I love my woven wrap and wrapping in general for babies, but for toddlers I personally like my carriers.  Just something else maybe you could consider.

[Tamera]

My husband is willing to use the maya wrap. Here he is with our DD when she was about 1:

[SouthernStormy]

DH is sort of the same way. He doesn't mind the wrap (he actually thinks its pretty cool), but always suggest we bring the stroller when we go anywhere. DH seems to think we have enough carriers, but really we only have 1 that works- we have 2 slings (one bought 2nd hand and one a gift, neither fit correctly), 1 sleepy wrap, and the moby- which I don't care to use). I want a woven as well, but figure the sleepy wrap works now.

Maybe showing him this site-
http://babywearingdads.tumblr.com/

Baby wearing daddys are hot!

[Italiamom]

Would he possibly be more into a more structured carrier?  DH LOVES the Ergo.  I like the look of wraps, and I doubt DH would have a problem using one, but I think the structured carriers might look more "manly"?  And even though he likes carrying the kiddos, the woven wraps have a learning curve as far as putting them on.  I think men tend to like more of the "buckle and go," which the structured carriers provide.  DH will use our Moby wrap, but I always have to help him wrap it...

That's DH at the coast this weekend, carrying DS in the Ergo.  DS is 2 and half.  We bought the Ergo new, and at the time I was thinking "why am I buying something that's over $100?"  2 years later, it was worth EVERY FREAKING PENNY.  And DH agrees!

Or maybe just show him a picture of Tamera's DH...  He is a pretty darn manly dude in those photos!

FWIW, the Bjorn is bearly comfortable at 9 pounds.  Put a 15 pound baby in that sucker and try to walk a few miles, and I guarantee that your shoulders will be screaming the next day.  Maybe try showing your DH some pictures of all the daddies carrying their kiddos, and explain that carrying your baby is a practical thing, and the Bjorn is NOT practical for larger babies, never mind into the toddler years...  Slings are a great tool, but honestly, as your baby gets bigger, something that will distribute that weight evenly over both shoulders, and down onto the hips will be so much better for YOUR long term health.

Basically: Good carrier - $100, not having to pay a $2500 deductable on shoulder surgery...  Well, he'll get the idea

[Italiamom]

Also, check Craigslist...  I bought a used Ergo for a friend that the woman had used 4 times for $40!  Although the woven wraps almost never come up...

[Beckily]

Dusty probably wears Charlie more than I do. He adores his Moby - though he does get embarrassed wearing it without the baby. I took him to change him and Dusty unwrapped it and sat funny until we came back ;)

[egmaranian]

The only carrier my DH will use is the Bjorn. I guess if I got a black or blue ergo, he might be willing to give it a shot, but the one I have is very feminine looking and I know DH wouldn't be caught dead in it!  He also refuses to try the moby. He is chomping at the bit to start using his bjorn though. He doesn't have a problem with more weight in it, so I'm sure he'll use it for a while. I just dint want to put ds2 in it until he's a few weeks older. Maybe around 4mo. We also have. Deuter backpack carrier that we use for camping/hiking and he'll definitely use that one. He just has a preference for structured carriers. 

[kylaskye]

DH doesn't want to buy another SSC because we already have one. Maybe if I get him to use it and fell how crappy it is... I haven't even used the bjorn yet, and he's already 12+lbs. I like the sling, but I can see how that will be uncomfortable as he gets bigger, especially when the shoulder slips further up my neck. (I keep it capped over my shoulder so it doesn't bother me yet.)

Thanks for all the suggestions. Maybe I'll show him the babywearing dads, that might help.

[SouthernStormy]

I'm sure this is a dumb question- but what's an SSC?

[Beckily]

Originally Posted by SouthernStormy 

I'm sure this is a dumb question- but what's an SSC?

Super sized carrier!

Sudsy shiny carrier!

Structured short carrier!

Super Special Carrier!

...

I've been wondering, too, thanks for asking ;)

[SouthernStormy]

Originally Posted by Beckily 

Super sized carrier!

Sudsy shiny carrier!

Structured short carrier!

Super Special Carrier!

...

I've been wondering, too, thanks for asking

lol! Glad I'm not the only one that's clueless. I like the super special option. I've been trying to think of what it could be.... but I got nothin!

[Tamera]

I assumed it meant soft structured carrier? I like super special carrier too Becky.

[HawaiianBlesing]

You can always try the FSOT sections on Diaperswapers.com or thebabywearer.com  You can get some really good deals there if you can 't find something on Craigslist.

Not DH/DP related but what are you BTDT mom's doing for winter wearing?  I've seen some coats that you can wear baby under but I'm not willing to shell out $250 right now. 

DH hasn't been wearing DS due to the fact that the wrap intimidates him a little.  We also bought one that was suppose to fit him and it barely fits me with some of the techniques.

I got him a Mei Tai so hopefully he will like that a little more.  Thinking about a ring sling as well.

[Beckily]

With as hot as both Charlie and I get when he's tied on me, I don't think I need a jacket! If we have one of our weird freezing winters, maybe, but it's rarely cold enough to need more than my baby-furnace.

[SouthernStormy]

Not a BTDT mom, but with as hot as it is in TX and GA I'm doubting we'll really see the need for a coat. I'm figuring as long as Mags' has long sleeves on (most likely double layered with a onesie underneath) and has the wrap around her, she'll be warm enough. MOst of the time during winter I wear short sleeves and I'm fine. My towns are so hot.

[Baby_Cakes]

Originally Posted by kylaskye 

DH doesn't want to buy another SSC because we already have one. 

You mean the Bjorn, right?  I just can't see that being comfortable with a 20+ lb child!  Maybe...Idk, but maybe you can sort of explain that something that you can use for back carries would be more practical for both of you?

[Tamera]

We also have an ergo sport that I bought on babysteals.com for half price. They have it on there every few months for like $65 brand new. We used it when my DD was about 20 months old in London. He doesn't mind using it because it's blue and doesn't look girly at all. It's a lot more comfortable with older babies/toddlers when you're out and about.

[nald1]

I am wondering if my LO would be better in a sling.  Any recomendations????