Queer and Pregnant: October, November and December - Page 11

[AmandaHope]

Quickly--

Seraf: You get serious life-skills points for making your own harness.  Wow.  How does it fasten?  Did you put a buckle on it?! Or does it tie?  Now I'm curious.

Starling and Wehrli: Thanks for the encouragement and info about milk donation.  I'm looking around and thinking about possibilities.

Library: I'm quite serious when I say that if you wanted to get me the shipping supplies (including dry ice, I believe, since that's how milk banks handle it), I'd be happy to send you about 50 oz of milk.  You'd have to look into the shipping details, but I'd be happy to share with little Alice!  I like the idea of helping premies, of course, but helping people with whom I already have a relationship is also quite compelling.  Starling--I'd send it to you in a heartbeat but am afraid that getting it across the border would be really tough.  And you sound like you're all set, which is awesome.  And Library--dancing to Glee with little kids sounds like some good fun. 

Seraf: While I also find the groceries story to be funny, I've also been thinking about what you said before about feeling more alone in the pregnancy. That makes so much sense.  I think pregnant women are nearly always more inwardly-focused than usual, which means that it must be extra hard to support a pregnant partner when you are pregnant yourself. And I know that you're not quite ready for baby yet--I hope you get the days off work you need to relax and restore before s/he shows up. 

EZ: I agree--you look fantastic!  Why only 20 lbs total? Yikes--that seems a bit low to me.  But however you do it, I'm glad things are going more or less how you'd hoped. 

KS and Seraf: I never got to the point of "get this baby out of me" with either pregnancy.  Sigh.  But I'm so grateful that I made it to "ok, you can come out if you need to" this time around. 

Hi to everyone else!

Update: Z's school had a big event tonight, and besides handling the stress of my mother being across a table from my in-laws (they mix like oil and water), Lilah was super fussy and would only calm down if I held her, but I had my mom, my mother-in-law, my father-in-law, and DP all trying to help by holding her so that I could watch the performance and eat dinner.  I so appreciated the efforts to help, but I just wanted to hold her so that she'd stop crying and be content.  This got me stressing hard about having to go back to work next week.  I'm full time as of Monday, though I'll be on campus only 2 days a week and somehow trying to work from home the other days (with help from DP and the in-laws).  I just want to keep Lilah with me and not work...but then I also get really antsy at home with no schedule and need the intellectual stimulation and independence of work.  I feel caught between a rock and a hard place, and I'm getting all weepy about it.

Edited by AmandaHope - 10/21/11 at 7:14pm

[mumquest]

Happy Weekend everyone!!

Saraf-Loving the booties, but we really need to see pics of this harness!!  Glad you are almost done working, sounds like it's time to take a break.

Escher-Hang in there and keep us posted, can't wait to see pics of the new arrival!  Good luck getting your projects done beforehand.

OMOM-Is your tot into crafts?  Might be time to look into some new and exciting indoor activities for the winter.  And I totally support everyone who is using tv/dvd's for personal necessity/sanity!  No guilt!!

2EZ-The nursery looks adorable!  Can't imagine four showers!! 

LibraryLady-Dancing with little ones is the best, I used to teach a musical theatre class in a k-1 afterschool and I miss it a bunch!  Such a great age.

AFM: Officially into week 8!  It is just starting to feel real.  Well, sorta.  After so many years of trying and one loss, it's hard not to be scared, but here's to hope!!  I think it's finally our turn.  So glad to be on the pregnant board and no longer TTC!

Please add me to the list: Due June 5  :)

[seraf]

Good morning and happy weekend everyone.

Escher, Ari asked about you again.  She is excited for you to have that baby.  As are we all.  I hope you're feeling well and get some good rest this weekend.

AmandaHope, You're right, I don't think people who deal with pre-term labor have that same evacuation desire.  I almost clarified when I was posting but clearly missed it.  I thought you used a pump to help bring on labor this last time?  Regarding the harness, I got a snap press for making diaper covers/one piece outfits (speaking of one piece outfits, is L still pooping in the potty?) and because I'm still nervous to try putting leather under my sewing machine, I just used snaps to join all the pieces together.  When I lived in San Francisco there were these monthly DIY workshops in The Mission that I rather adored.  They had an entire warehouse with 5 classes running at a time and they taught how to do everything from making solar cookers and pinhole cameras to guerrilla greywater and Toy making.  So I know there are plenty of women out there making their own everything.  I don't recall them teaching how to make harnesses, but they clearly imparted the attitude that anyone could make anything.  

Mumquest, Welcome!  Congratulations!  I hope you feel good and have a  nice easy pregnancy.

Things got exciting over here yesterday (no baby) and Sara found out she gets to go to Isreal in December for 10 days for next to nothing.  Very exciting for her.  We were planning a trip to Little Rock to see my dad, leaving on the 25th and returning on the 31st.  Now Sara will be arriving back in the states on the 25th, and we looked into her flying straight to Little Rock on return but something about spending 3 straight weeks away from home seems a little stressful.  So now the kids and I are moving the trip up so we return home before the 25th.  I am probably mildly insane for taking the kids on 14 hour road trip (each way) by myself.  The baby should be about 5-8 weeks old.  I hope against hope that she's a good car baby.  I looked into plane tickets but it would be an easy $1000 which I can't afford at a time when I'm not working.  

Unless something comes up and she doesn't get to go on this trip for some reason (we should know in a few days for sure for sure, but she emailed and mentioned the pregnancy because that was surely not a question on the application) Library and 2ez, the kids and I are going to be in your neck of the woods before Christmas instead of after.  I would love a chance to meet up if y'all have time.  2ez, you should have a very new baby, and I totally understand if you want to make it a next time thing.  LOL.

Edited by seraf - 10/22/11 at 6:04am

[Mizyellow]

Library, I second the milk offer. We all know I have more milk than I need. I gave some to a friend that is preggo and having a hard time supplying for her 6 month old but I could send ou around 70 ounces. And I bet in a month or two I could do the same!

setaf. We all want to see this harness. Have I mentioned that I think you are insane for thinking about arohad trip with a tin one. Although baby h screams every second he is in the car.

2ez. 20 lbs? Jeez you are pretty strict eh? Cute pic. Love the belly.

Sooooooo I emailed the donor and let him know about h ( only 3 months later) and he said he would be happy to donate again when I am ready! How exciting?! So naturally I am obsessing about when or if I should have anothe r.i am thinking three years from now startntrying. I will be 31, Lennon will be 6 and h will be 3. Chels thinks I am insane or even considering another baby right. Ow when am so stressed with the boys and work but babies are cute.

Just so you knowi a, nursing and typing on an iiPad

[prettyisa]

Seraf—well, I was knitting them, but true to form I got most of the way through one and realized that the sizing was WAY off. I need to either learn to crochet or actually start following the directions on knitting. I’m just so used to sewing where you can fix your mistakes later and I’m confident enough to wing it that I forget that I can’t actually knit…Also, I love that you are making your own harness and birth stool—you’ll need ‘em both sooner or later, so you might as well have them around, right? Also, Israel is gorgeous—is she going on a Birthright trip? My grandma took us—I still remember the food…

2EZ—the nursery is cute—but not as cute as you! Do you have the name picked out already, or are you waiting to meet him before you make your final decision? I love the boat theme!

Starling—how did the midwife appointment go?

Escher—I did! I once won a set of tickets to Monkey Jungle with that very factoid.

Library—that’s going to be hard for me—I hate tums. I won’t even kiss DP if she’s had one. But I suppose that the heartburn will eventually win over my aversion, right?

AHope—oh, I’m so nervous about that feeling. We’re still waiting to see about layoffs and for now the plan will be an extended (and financially stressful) maternity leave while I wait to see how things sort out and then try to find other jobs if I don’t get hired back. And I am afraid of that dual want-to-be-home, want-to-talk-to-adults thing that you mention. I wish you were closer so we could just come by and hang out.

Mumquest—yay! I’ll go add you right now!

Mizyellow—I don’t think you’re crazy at all! How nice that he’d be up for another round in the future!

AFM—work stuff is still stressful, but I think I finally felt the baby kick! I was getting a massage (who knew that chiropractors sometimes have a herd of massage therapists in their office to do insurance-covered massages? Not me! But they DO!!) and the guy was working on my ‘lower back’, which is to say that he had an elbow wedged into my glutes. As I tried not to writhe in pain I felt this very distinct, frantic fluttering in my belly—Prosper does NOT like it when people mess with his mama, apparently. It was lovely, but of course I doubt I’ll be able to recreate it, so I expect to have to wait a few more weeks to start feeling it without being shoved into a massage table.

[2ezforyou]

You ladies are too sweet! I feel like a cow most days.

Amanda & Miz - The whole 20lbs thing is really a joke. I always thought if/when I became preg I'd have a body that loved to gain about 80 lbs. When I actually did get preg, I kinda set a goal that I was going to eat whatever I wanted, but when I started to get close to the 20 lb mark, I'd back off and put myself on a more healthy diet. I've done really well, and have my share of veggies, whole grains, etc. I have also had my share of donuts, ice cream, and fatty yums! :) I was at 8 lbs until 28 wks, then 13 lbs at 31 wks, and now at 34 wks, I am at 17, so it became a goal to try to not get higher than 20. I am thrilled with my weight gain overall.

Isa - I *think* we have a name, but we are defintely waiting until he's born to tell anyone. DP isn't one to keep a secret so it's been harder on her than me. I am so easily influenced by others opinions that I didn't want to tell anyone what we're naming him or even what we are considering. His middle name is 100% and has been for a coujple years, so it's been tough narrowing his first name choices. We have 3 "final choices" - 1 I LOVE, 1 that DP LOVES, and then a thrid that we both like alot. DP is getting more attached to my favorite, but is only about 90% on board. She still has her moments. I just want to look at his little face to make sure it 'fits.' I know that might sound weird, but I feel we will know when we see him.

Third trimester fatigue is kicking my booty. I've taken a 4 hour nap the last 3 days...and I hate napping. Ugh!

Hope everyone is having a wonderful weekend!

[AmandaHope]

Seraf: Yup, I used the pump with much success, but that was because my water had broken 36 hours earlier.  And yes, Lilah is still using the potty (ie, sink).  She goes in it several times a day when I'm around to do it.  I wish DP would get on board, but she feels like it is extra work, probably because she's also not into the cloth diapers.  For me, keeping a CD clean is a good motivation. Sigh.

I have enormous respect for you, Saraf, but I do truly think you are insane for planning a 14-hour road trip alone with two children and a newborn.  More power to you, insane lady!  By the way, if you are looking for long road trips, you should come back up here!  We'd love to see you all again.  Finally, I'm also curious about this free trip to Israel.  Too bad about the timing, though.  Do you have other family who could stay with you to help?

2EZ: It is hard work growing a baby who is packing on the pounds.  Enjoy the naps. 

Isa: How exciting that you felt a flutter!  I love when massage therapists stick their elbows into my butt muscles--hurts so good!   And what a bonus that you get a flutter with it, too! I hope you get more soon, though it is early and may not be at all consistent, so don't worry if you don't.  The conflicted baby/work time feeling is my least favorite part of parenting in the early years.  I wish we could hang out more easily, too.  How about a fall queer mamas gathering at our place?  Are you free on Sun. Nov. 20th?

EZ: Can't wait to hear your name when the baby is born.  I completely know what you mean about waiting to see the little one's face before deciding for sure.  We felt the same way. 

MizYellow: Awesome that you have such a generous and willing donor!  Can you remind us how you met him and what role he plays in your family's life?  It sounds like a wonderful relationship.

How much does H weigh these days?

Mumquest: Congratulations and welcome!!   If you would, please tell us about your family and your ttc journey.  Fingers crossed for a sticky bean and a healthy pregnancy for you. 

AFM: Lovely morning at the local town Halloween festival.  Z was a vampire queen and L was a cow.  So sweet!  Here is a pic, though Z isn't wearing her fangs in this one.

[prettyisa]

Amanda--at the risk of going against that article on talking about little girls, Z is quite beautiful in that photo! L is, too (well, scrumptious is really the word I'd use), but Z just looks so elegant with her hair back like that. Funny you suggest that date--my dad asked us not 45 minutes ago if we could come out to DeKalb that day to attend their concert, so we'd love to come to your house and visit! I'll get back to you on what time they'll expect us out there and you let me know if it'll work for you.

2EZ-- I think names are like that. We're pretty sold on some of our choices, but then one of us will get attached to one and the other just HATES it. I'm sure when you see him you'll know what the right one is!

[qmama42]

Hi all, it's so easy to get behind! Missed you all, but have been keeping up...

Starling--The other day you mentioned that your scar was lumpy--mine was the same way and my ob prescribed some Cordran tape, which gives your incision a dose of steroids and anti-inflammatory. It helped smooth mine out since I was concerned about a keloid forming. I think I still have some in in my medicine cabinet actually...anyway, just an idea if you have comcerns about it. I'm not sure if there is a natural product out there for this type of thing or not.

2ez--You still look fantastic. I can't believe you're so close! I feel the same way about names as you do. We don't share until after the baby is born. Love the nursery too!

Mumquest--Welcome! I hope you're feeling good and it's great to see you on this board! I hope you'll be in a good space to relax and enjoy pregnancy, especially after having suffered a loss. Here's to a health pregnancy!

AHope--I'm sorry you are facing a tough time with having to go back to work full-time. If only there was a really great way to have it both ways. Being at home with your babe is wonderful and at the same time it is also a form of thought deprivation--all critical, intellectual, adult thinking and conversations go out the door. On another note, I love the picture! The kids look adorable in costume!

Seraf--Wow, I am impressed that you are even entertaining the notion of a road trip with three kids. How are you feeling? I hope that your last week of work is easy so you can get some rest before the baby comes. I am excited to hear about how/when this little one will decide to enter the world.

OMOM--Hi! Yes, it's nice to have a buddy whose due date is close to mine. I'm in my 23rd week and feeling pretty good. I started prenatal yoga today and I can't believe how good movement and stretching felt. I tend to be a little on the impatient side so I'm not a yoga person otherwise, but it is really nice to be able to slow down during this time and focus on my body in a really healthy way. Are you doing anything in particular now that you're solidly into the second tri?

Sara--Hey there, how are you feeling these days? Less nauseated, I hope! Are you getting some time to slow down and rest at all? I'm also super-curious about this Israel trip. Tell us more!

Isa--Yay for flutters! I love it that Prosper is already getting all protective. I'm also glad that you now know the secret to a good chiropractor--the massage therapists that work with them! I always love going because I get a bonus massage before or after my treatment.

Mizyellow--That's great news about the donor! You must be really good place to be thinking about #3 this early. I think that's fantastic!

AFM--Test drove a few bigger vehicles today. Sadly, we will have to give up our Toyota pick-up (much to the disappointment of my wife who Loves Loves Loves it) since it can't transport 4 of us. I can't believe it has come to this, but we are actually considering a minivan. Anyway, we've got a bit of time, so we are waiting for the right thing to come our way. If any of you out there have something that you love and want to recommend, we are all ears. We spent the afternoon looking at Toyotas, but are keeping options open.

I am loving feeling the thumps and kicks of this baby! They are getting stronger all of the time and it's fun to just lay there and feel her moving around. Very peaceful and meditative for me. I am also really in a space where I am embracing the changes in my body. Sounds hokey, but as I was at yoga today, all I could think about was how much I was looking forward to breastfeeding my baby. I was envisioning it as we were sitting in some of the poses. Not sure what that was all about, but it was a really serene thought.

Speaking of body, my birthday is next month and I suggested to DP that I might want a maternity photo shoot for my present this year. Or maybe I want one with the baby. I don't know. I've seen some really amazing maternity photos lately and I wonder if it's worth it since they tend to be might expensive. The idea of doing it make me feel a little vain, but other hand, this is my last pregnancy and I'd love to have it captured in photos,

Okay, that's all from me for now. Hope you women are having a lovely weekend!

Hello to Escher, Library, KSDoula, Crystal, Julietea, Wehrli and Indigo too. And of course, anyone else I missed!

[seraf]

Yellow, I though Chels was going next?   Did her watching you go through all that make her change her mind?

Isa, Prosper?  Is that the baby nickname?  And YAY for movement. You can probably feel more if you lay on your belly.  We talked about it a while before you joined us.  A lot of us had luck that way. LOL, I feel the same way about knitting.  This was my first knit with a pattern.  Usually I'm just like, um, it needs to be this big by that big.  I can figure that out.  My other problem with trying to knit baby stuff is that it looks too small to actually fit a human.  I totally forgot about the hat I started for my brother.  He comes home tonight, I need to take it with me to work and work on it.  And yeah, learning to crochet is easy, just look for videos online.  My grandma taught me to knit and crochet when I was 4 so it seems somewhat familiar when I look at the instructional vids and I can usually make something happen, well, so long as it doesn't require following directions.  My grandma could also look at something sewn, decide she wanted it and make up a pattern and replicate it within a couple of hours. She was pretty cool.  Yeah, Sara is going with birthright.  I don't know much about the program.  I only know that Isreal is on the news almost daily, so it makes me nervous.  She assures me she will be safe. I told her I just won't watch the news while she's gone.

2ez, I take your 20 pounds and double it!  I gained next to nothing with Osha.  Like in the teens until about 35 weeks then I started packing on water.  So I had 27 pounds total but, like I said, a lot was water.  Haha, now I'm aiming higher because I felt like I was frighteningly thin after he was born.  I know you don't really have much control over how much you gain, and healthy eating should do it for you, but certainly eat to hunger.

AmandaHope, Z looks so much like you.  And a baby cow is hilarious.  I figure if I think it's insane for that kind of travel, it probably is.  But I also figure the kid will sleep 16 ours a day still at that point so we will be driving in 1-2 hour chunks and taking 2 days to travel each way.  Sara is going with birthright.  I don't know much about it except you have to be under 27 and born Jewish.  She had to put down a deposit but she gets most of it back and she has to find her way to new york and back.  She was really hoping she could fly out of Chicago instead and visit, but that's not what happened.  I will be fine while she's gone.  I will miss her terribly, but my mom lives downstairs, I have a cousin about 3 blocks away and an aunt in town 7 miles from here.  And really the kids are big enough to feed themselves (even tho they usually don't) and if I offered to pay him, Osha would happily be a post partum servant and do whatever I asked.  Cooking, dishes, laundry (but not folding.  Ari will fold but she's still pretty rough at it).  He is very easy going.  But really I imagine Sara will return home to a pretty messy house.  Unless I recruit that cousin or aunt to help out, and they may since we will be hosting Christmas dinner downstairs probably.

Qmama, when is your birthday?  We are hopefully going to have 2 november birthdays in our house soon!  I love them.  I drive a Yaris.  A 4 door would have been better, but it's a stick and I do a lot of highway driving so I get 40~ miles to the gallon.  I am a little sad about selling it, but it is useless for a family of 6.  Worked great for a family of 4 (except camping, I always struggled to fit enough junk in it for camping)!

I feel good.  Feet are swelling.  Had a great day yesterday that even included a haunted house.  It did not scare the baby out of me but it was pretty fun.  I had about a million contractions yesterday.  I actually timed them, but obviously not labor.

I hope everyone has a great rest of the weekend.

[KSDoulaMama]

Originally Posted by prettyisa 

Library—that’s going to be hard for me—I hate tums. I won’t even kiss DP if she’s had one. But I suppose that the heartburn will eventually win over my aversion, right?

If you have heartburn, my midwife recommends papaya enzymes instead of Tums. I don't know if you'd find them more palatable or not, but apparently too much Tums can cause problems. (I can't remember what- bladder stones or something.) I sometimes ate the Tums and sometimes papaya enzymes and they both seemed to work equally well.

[Go_Vegan]

Hello all! After 12 cycles of trying I am finally knocked up. My calculations put my EDD at July 1st. My DP and I live in Richmond VA and I am a social worker and a new doula. We tried 9 cycles of frozen iui, then switched to a known donor and got pregnant on the 3rd try with him. I hope everyone is feeling great!

[smilingsara]

I'm doing a terrible job of posting again! I suck!

I know a few of you asked about my Israel trip. I get to go through birthright and its an orginazation that allows anyone born jewish who as never been to israel to go, for free, if they are 18-27. I applied this summer and didnt get it, so I reapplied this winter and luckily got a spot on the trip. I fly out of NYC on december 13th, arrive in israel on the 14th and stay until december 24th and fly home, arriving on the 25th (I think). I'm so pumped! I'm REALLY nervous about leaving Sara and the baby for so long, her going on the trip to her dads alone (even though I know she is way strong enough and crazy enough to do the trip on her own). and I'm REALLY worried the baby is going to forget who I am and stuff. SIllyness I know, but still, those are my worries. I'm very excited to go and I've already played out the trip in my head a million times! 

Today I came to the conclusion that I don't like how my body looks and how my clothes fit. I feel gross and fat. Other than that, the morning sickness is getting better (just have to stay away from chocolate still and remember the unisom and b6). 

I'm off to go finish scrubbing the bath tub because sara said she'd like it to be available for a bath during labor!

[gumshoegirl007]

Smilingsara - What an awesome opportunity to get to go to Israel!  I'm glad that seraf and yourself have an awesomely supportive relationship.  While I'm sure you will miss the baby horribly, I'm sure Seraf will plop him/her/hir into your arms as soon as you return.

GoVegan - Welcome to Q&P and congrats!!!  You and your partner must be very excited about this BFP and forthcoming baby!!!

KSDoulaMama - I don't think I congratulated you on your pregnancy yet, so congrats!!!  You and your IPs must be thrilled!!!

Seraf - You're so close to the end now...here's hoping that Sara got the tub cleaned in time ;)  

Qmama - I hear you on the bigger vehicle.  I wasn't quite ready for a minivan, so we kept our rav4 and purchased a thule to carry the cargo (we couldn't get the 3rd row seating aftermarket).  When we actually counted how many times we all went together anywhere as a family of five, it was shockingly very little.  I guess that's what happens when you have teens.  I love my rav4 and am so glad that we didn't have to give it up.  And, go for the photo shoot.  Yes, they're pricey, but this as you said it's your last pregnancy and it is, after all, your birthday.

AmandaHope - What a great pic of Z and L.  I hope I can get my kids to cooperate for something similar on Halloween!  I think today is your first day of work - how are you doing?  With my Canadian mat leave, this is still a ways off for me, but I've just started to talk with work and I think we have child care and I'm also really conflicted as to what to do.  Less of a need for intellectual stimulation and career drive (I'm feeling quite lost as to where I want to go), but more torn as I'd like more income for our little family and I'd have to work to do that.  We've got post-secondary coming up for the big kids, and I'd like to have a vacation and clothes, and activities for the family, so that means I have to work or reconcile going without those extras to be with the baby.  I recognize it's a privilege to have this decision to make, but it's not an easy one.

2ez - I know it's your insane time of the year and I bet you're not enjoying those third trimester naps too much!  I also can't wait to hear the name you choose for your baby as we had a similar name dilemma.  One DW loved, one I loved, and one we really liked and agreed upon and that's what we called our kid.

Prettyisa - Massage and a baby kick.  Lucky you!!!  I loved that part of pregnancy (both taking the time for fabulous self care and communing with my wee one).

Mizyellow - I love that you're thinking of having another one.  Access to sperm will do that to you ;)  How much does baby Harrison weigh now?  And, are you taking him or Lennon to swim lessons?  DW is going to enroll with the baby in the winter and she just loves to swim and swim and swim.

Mumquest - Congrats on your pregnancy and welcome to Q&P.  How are you feeling so far?

LibraryLady - I can't wait to see your pumpkin patch photos!  I'm super jealous as that's not going to happen for us this year.  We just went to the grocery store yesterday and carved some pumpkins.

Escher - Did you make it through the weekend?  My little baby showed up earlier than expected (she arrived at 39 weeks) and I just wasn't ready yet.  I had a whole other week of plans to get through and the baby joyously interrupted that.  I hope that you can get more of the things done that you want to and have the time to get yourself ready to meet your wee one.  I wish I had of had more time to be still and focus before I went into labour.  Although, I'm not very patient and I'm sure I would have started complaining that she was taking too long if I had of gone past 40 weeks!

Starling - How are you healing up?  Feeling a bit better now?  I love that you have one boob to contribute to Library's titty ninja revolution. It's also good that it's the left one ;)  And sleep, oh you're so lucky that sleep is going well.  Sigh.

Onemommyonemama - Do you have early years centers or a library near you?  I've been making winter plans to try to get out to places like those for small activities (weather permitting) that are indoors but will get you out of the house.  I have this dog that needs walking so that is getting me out most days.

Wehrli - Hi!!!  I didn't see a post on the last two pages from you, but there's been lots of conversation and I didn't want to miss a chance to give you a shout out!

To anyone else I missed, hello and sorry!

AFM - Things are pretty great, despite the fact I'm a walking zombie (see notes re: sleep below).  The baby has been really stabilizing for our big kids and it's amazing to watch them fall in love with her and dote on her.  Our son can make the baby laugh hysterically on demand.  Our eldest daughter is very caring and nurturing.  We're feeling a bit zapped in the energy department and I'm feeling guilty about not getting much quality time with the big kids.  We talk and there's lots of hang out time, but we haven't done much together that is outside of school events.

I'm finding myself pretty overwhelmed at times over a plate that's too full.  The thing is, if I'm being reflexive, the plate is not that full.  I just can't cope with as much as I used to.  I think sleep deprivation is messing with me.  When I think of going back to work full time and handling what I do now, I want to cry.  It's too much and I don't know how it will all get done since I'm feeling so tapped right now.  I know I'll figure it out and it will all be okay, so I just keep on pep talking myself.  Anyone else in the same boat or have some tips?

With respect to the baby, she's doing awesome. She's 7 months today. We have 4 teeth now and she can sit on her own for quite a long time. I read that crawling is supposed to quickly proceed sitting, but she's been sitting well since 5.5 months and doesn't seem all that interested in crawling.  She's pretty solid and sturdy and loves to stand with our assistance.  We're wondering if she might go straight from rolling to walking.  You can stand her up on your leg or against the couch now and she can do that pretty much unsupported.  She also pulled herself up from sitting to standing all on her own yesterday for the first time!

The baby loves to eat and will totally feed herself.  We're doing a baby led weaning/hybrid approach (she's getting some purees from a spoon, while you load the spoon she insists on taking it into her hands to feed herself) and she eats a wide variety of solids.  She also had her first temper tantrum the other day.  She loves to play with her high chair strap and when we took it away she started to cry and bounce up and down on her legs.  She's done it since and it's pretty amusing.  I might have filmed it.

She also loves to laugh and giggle.  Her Mama, brother and dog are the biggest sources of amusement for her.  It's pretty hysterical as they don't need to do much to get her going.

Since most of us Moms of spring babies have been commiserating about sleep, I'm unfortunately not going to be able to brag about how awesome my baby is.  She's not.  Frankly, she sucks.  The early months were awesome (0-4) and as soon as we hit 4 months it's been crap.  We co-sleep and the baby is up so much at night.  She's never been much of a napper during the day.  What I've come to realize is that she's not up, but she's a fussy sleeper, who wriggles and thrashes, and cries out in her sleep.  Thus waking me up a lot at night.  Her patterns are odd in that she eats dinner (solids) at 6pm, then goes for a bath and her bedtime routine, and nurses heavily and we put her down at 7pm-ish for the night.  She falls asleep easily, but an hour later she's up and wants to eat again.  I give her the other boob.  Then she may fall back asleep or she stays up to party for an hour or two. Then she's up and down for the rest of the night.  I've think I've maybe had one or two 5 hour stretches of uninterrupted sleep in the past 7 months.  Never anything longer!

We were trying to get her to do the first part of her night alone in the crib, but that's not working out, so we have her in our bed (she wasn't fooled by my idea to wrap a warm water bottle in my t-shirt as substitute for me).  Then she "wakes" up 3-6 more times throughout the night.  She's really loud when she does it.  And over the last week or so she's really demonstrating a preference to sleep on her side or stomach and she sleeps so much better this way.  I'm nervous about stomach sleeping in our bed with the sheets and stuff and she does get really hot while sleeping.  So we're just struggling through.  Last night, at 5am after 30 or so minutes of this thrashing/crying thing, I pulled the pack n' play right beside our bed and put her in there in her tummy and she fell asleep on her own and stayed that way until 7am.  Awesome!  Maybe I'll try that again cause it was genius that it worked.

This is the longest update ever that I'm sure will require too much energy to read.  So, I'll leave you all with a photo or two!

 

[justrose13]

gumshoe, thanks for the update! keeping up on FB isn't quite the same as here...

I don't really have it in me to go into personals... I think of all of you often and post when I can.

afm, DP reconnected with an old friend yesterday who has a toddler since the last time they saw each other... her friend believes in AP and it was good for DP to talk to her (read: someone other than me) about it. while she trusts me and goes along with most things I want re AP and such, she's always been a bit skeptical. no one in her life, otherwise, is very crunchy... I think DF will help normalize things like co-sleeping and nursing to sleep. BUT the biggest and most important thing that happened during her reconnection was the suggestion of chamomile tea... for S. so I read some more online and deemed it safe in my eyes, brewed a strongish cup and gave S about an ounce a half hour before bedtime. he fell asleep like a dream! but the best was that he slept for 5 hours straight FOR. THE. FIRST. TIME. EVER! then he slept for 3 more hours! then 2 more!! (he usually sleeps for 2-3 hrs the is up every 1-2 for the rest of the night) OMG... I feel so great today! then about a half hour before nap this morning I gave him maybe 10ml (via syringe) and he fell asleep with almost rocking alone. then he fell asleep during a nursing session, without any additional help (he usually needs dark, white noise and humming while nursing and most times rocking, too) for his second nap! Amazing! I also read it transfers well into BM, so drink up mamas!

wow, that got lengthy... :/

typed on iPad with babe in my right arm... sorry for typos... I'm not going to correct them as my wrist already hurts.

love to all!

[DAWNMP1]

Hi all!

First off, I want to say a big, very overdue CONGRATULATIONS to all the new mamas on the board and to all the newly preggo folks! 

Not sure if you ladies remember me - I was active for a brief period awhile back on the QC board and just a little on this board.  My partner got her BFP around the same time as Escher and Seraf and our little girl is due Nov. 1.   I’ve been lurking a bit throughout the pregnancy on my phone and cheering you all on from the sidelines, but posting has not really happened as (1) I primarily catch up from my phone and I don’t seem to be able to get it to post and  (2) while I know I would have been very welcome as a non-gen mom, I felt like I didn’t have a ton to contribute from personal experience as I’ve been mostly just focused on keep my lovely DP as comfy, well-fed and supported as possible.       I have loved reading along though.

I’ve found all the great newborn care and advice especially helpful.  Since we are going to have a newborn very soon, I was wondering if there is still ok to post and interact on this board even though I missed posting during the actual “Queer and Pregnant” time.  Thoughts?  I really want to be respectful of the purpose of the board and the lovely community you all have all created!

As for the next week or so, we are just preparing, preparing, preparing.  We are planning to deliver in a hospital with staff midwives who are amazing and we hired a doula that is still in training, but that came highly recommended and that has worked with our midwives before.  DP feels strongly about going as natural as possible (I do too, but it's her body and her opinion that matters most in this case!) I'm planning to take three weeks off work to be home with her and the baby and she plans to go back to work after 4 months at home. 

OMOM, also just wanted to say congrats again and thanks for all the advice on being the non-ges mom.  I feel like I can at least anticipate some of the unique emotions to come thanks to your very generous sharing.

All the best to all of you!

Dawn

[LibraryLady]

Howdy all~ This will be a short post, since Mean Girl might come by at any moment, but I wanted to say hello and post a pic from the punkin patch.  We had a lovely time, though my intense baby's frowny face doesn't look like it.  I think the most fun at the Patch was had by DP, who freaked out with excitement at the hayride and the piglet races. 

Gumshoe~ GREAT to hear from you!! And your baby is ADORABLE!!! Look at that li'l face!!!  Alice is the same with food~ she'll allow you to put the food on the spoon but from then on she insists on doing it herself!! 

AHope~ I love your costume kiddos too!! That cow is the cuteness!  And THANK YOU for your amazingly generous offer. I'll talk to DP about it, but in the meantime we know your bounty is going to preemies and that's probably the best place for it.  

Seraf~ I second AHope's belief that you're insane/very brave to undertake such a roadtrip. If at all possible, we'll cruise over to see you. What fun!! The Israel trip sounds really neat too.  That's a great program they have to allow everyone to visit. Wow!

Dawn~ I remember you for sure, and I can't speak for everyone but I don't see any reason why you couldn't jump back in any time you like. I mean, it's the  Q&P board and some of us haven't been P in months and we're still here. Go for it!! Can't wait to see pix of your little girl!!

Vegan~ WELCOME!!!!!!  This is the best place to be.  Looking forward to your journey xo\

Isa~ Yay for flutters!!  And massages. SO nice!  I have a massage gift certificate I need to use up, actually,  Need to get on that...

EZ~ I think your name plan is ideal. That's what we did. We had four we liked and waited to see her face.  Our second favorite was Josephine, but when we saw her, DP said that Josie is a brunette's name, and Alice is certainly not a brunette (as her punkin pic will show...)

AFM~ Not much. Quiet weekend. Alice was wonderful for her trip to the Patch and then later when we went to the OU homecoming parade.  Sunday she took a nice long nap and let me do some housework and even a bit of writing. WOW!!!   Now I'm back at it, and have a feeling it's going to be a long week. Thank goodness I have you ladies to keep me sane.   Much love!!!!

[Mizyellow]

Gumshoe: Stinking cute pictures! I am so glad the older kids are doing well with their sister, I bet that is a joy to watch. Harrison weighs somewhere around 14 lbs and is 24 1/2 inches long. BIG kid!

Seraf: Chels and I have pretty much decided that I am to be the baby maker. It makes the most sense with our family dynamic and I make really cute kids. Sometimes she changes her mind but I think when the time comes I will probably end up pregnant. She actually told me the other day taht if she had a penis I would probably be pregnant by now (which is probably true). so.....the baby has one more week in there! Halloween baby!!

Escher: Did you birth a baby this weekend?

2EZ- I think a 20 lbs weight sounds amazing. I was proud of my 28 lbs but barely any of it has come off! Go figure. Hope you are less busy soon.

ahope: Oh my god your girls are so lovely! The cow costume is AMAZING. Harrison said his future girlfriend is so pretty l)

Starling and Julie: Hope all is well in your home!

Dawn: congrats on your impending baby!! You will have to post pics!

sO many babies coming! I can't wait!

AFM: Great weekend, we went to the pumpkin fest and had a ball. We went shopping yesterday and spent WAY too much money but I got 2 beatles shirts (for me), matching hats for the boys, xmas gifts and some cute new panties (time to part with the granny panties)

A couple pics to go! My fam !

[escher]

Quickly: He's here! Our sweet, sweet son (name to be determined) arrived early this morning. We think he is absolutely the most perfect baby in the world and we're already totally in love.

The birth did not go as expected, and after about 50 hours of active labor and some fetal distress we ended up transferring and had a c-section. Obviously this is not what we were hoping for, but we're thrilled with our baby and feel absolutely grateful to have him.

More details and pictures coming soon!

Love to everyone!

[qmama42]

Escher--Congratulations! Welcome to the world, baby boy! Sooo happy to hear that he has arrived safely and please tell us more after you've had some time to rest and stare at your perfect little bundle!