October Chit Chat - Page 29 « Back to Group Discussions

[Jaimee]

To add your name please include the following with the formatting below (choose a color for your bolded names):

Your screen name- Your first name: due date, baby #, anything else you'd like such as your age, birth plan, how long your were ttc, etc.

Early November

meb2-Morgan: 11/1 with #1

Caracol8- Michele: 11/1, baby #1, planning on a home birth, hopefully in my new fishy pool

rhombus - April. 11/2 with #3. planning another homebirth.

berry987- Lindsey: 11/2, #4, hospital birth (I think I finally have the confidence to have a natural hospital birth after two homebirths; we recently moved to a new state and I couldn't find a midwife I liked as much as my previous midwife, but I did find an OB I love....so hospital birth it is!)

MrsKatie- : 29, 11/4 Planning a midwife-assisted birth in a birth center.

LunaLady- Christina: Had her baby boy at 33 weeks

Mal85- Mallory: 11/6, Tried for 6 months before getting our BFP

Seraf, Sara: 11/8, third child

Paigekitten- Katie, 11/8, expecting our third baby

KayPea- Kirsten: 11/8, #2. We tried for 9 months (while still BFing DD)

Lilstar- Rachel: 11/9, #3, planning my 2nd HBAC with a CPM.

2011mama- MK: Due 11/9 with baby #1, TTC 9 months with PCOS, Planning a homebirth with a CPM.

SoCaliMommy- Kami: 11/9, #3, Planning a UC, TTC-- This baby took a little over 3 years and a miscarriage at 9-10wks in 11/2010, the due date is a special day in that it is the day I passed the baby we lost.

TalkToMeNow- Amanda: 11/9, #4, This baby will be born at the hospital with a midwife. I'm 31. Our fourth child but my third pregnancy.

Ablemec- Mishy: 11/9, #1, a boy, We weren't really TTC- we had just stopped avoiding, We plan to birth at a hospital with a midwife.

Mid November

Krystal323- Krystal: 11/11, # 5, Planning a UC

Autumnshades- Sonja: 11/12, #1, Planning a homebirth with our midwife, TTC for 9 months

Lula's Mom- Kristi: 11/13, baby #4.  I'm 39 and planning our 3rd unassisted birth.

birdhappy85- Joanie: 11/14, baby #1, a girl, I'm 25, planning a water birth at home!

Breed210- Ang: 11/16

Jbk21- Jacquelyn: 11/16-19th, #2,  A little bit of an unexpected pregnancy, though we were discussing having #2.

Saharaswims- Sarah: 11/18, #1, can't wait!

musicmama08 - Crystal: 11/18, baby 2, had the last one at home, but having this one with midwifes at the hospital.  Hoping for the most natural birth / intervention-free as possible.

Late November

abraisme- Abra:  11/21, #3, Planning my 3rd homebirth, NTNP for 6 months

IwannaBanRN-Becky: 11/21. #3, fifth pregnancy. I'm 21.  This one was unplanned and I was on birth control.

Eternal_Howl - Raewyn: 11/21, #1, Had ovarian cancer at 27, so feel very blessed.

crazykittymomma- Sarah: 11/23 with baby #2 (another girl!), planning a HBAC

meesh933- Michele: 11/24, #3, The plan is to birth at home with a midwife.

justamama- Dennie: late November with #4

dashley111- Ash:  11/26.

miriam_bat_avraham- Julie: age 28, 11/28 with twins after 27 months of trying & 6 months of fertility treatments.

Jaimee- Jaimee: 11/28, #3 and an oops! baby

KaliShanti-Kali: 11/29, #3, 3rd homebirth :)

Early December

Viriditas- Amy: 12/2, #2, but 3rd pregnancy (I was a surrogate after DS), I've gone 10 days early and 3 weeks early with the last 2, so I think this babe will be here in November, planning a HB with a CPM

Edited by Jaimee - 10/21/11 at 6:29am

[birdhappy85]

MrsKatie - I'm sorry you're having to deal with that kind of stress at home, of all places that should be your sanctuary and resting place. How long after the baby is born until you think you and DH might move into your own home? Is it possible to do it sooner? Mortgage interest rates are at an all time low, literally - we just locked in a refinance at 3.875% - and I've been telling friends to bite the bullet and just go for it if they're able to! But of course it depends on the type of loan you're going for (FHA versus conventional, definite advantages to conventional) and how much of a down payment you want to have saved up. I hope you guys can find a house in Oregon for a great price that allows you to build your own nest away from DH's grandmother - and SOON! Crossing my fingers for you.

As for my work dilemma... Thanks to all for the responses. I'll try to respond to a few questions I saw. In regards to me being able to get on DH's health insurance if I lost my job: Yes, I would be able to. However, his insurance likely wouldn't cover my home birth, and I was actually lucky enough to get my current insurance company to approve to cover my home birth as in-network. So we'd be out thousands of dollars... Which would really be upsetting, as you can imagine, considering having that happen would be just weeks shy of the birth. In regards to KayPea's question about PPD. Oh yes, I'm nervous about that one. I've had the worst prenatal depression and anxiety... My doctors and midwives have pretty much agreed I'm really likely to have PPD based on my history. I'm just optimistic and hopeful right now that it won't be so bad because I'm going the placenta encapsulation route and have heard hopeful things about that helping keep depression at bay. I don't know how likely it is to work, though... I've spent this whole pregnancy telling my health care providers that I don't think I'll be back to normal after the pregnancy is over, but they give me mixed messages about things just because what they've witnessed from me is an exacerbation in mental health problems due to the hormones. I don't know what to think! Should I expect best case scenario or prepare for the worst? There isn't much I can do one way or another in the meantime.

Luckily my therapist was able to get me in to see her last night and go over the letter from my work and come up with a plan. I wrote a letter to my work today requesting an additional leave of absence, explained briefly what for, and stated a return date of January 16, 2012. That would give me about 8 weeks postpartum to readjust with hormones and stuff. I guess that's all I can do right now and see what they say. This company doesn't seem to be out to get me. They're family friendly in some ways so I can't see them honestly forcing me to come back at 38 weeks pregnant. But then again, I haven't been there in almost 3 months and my position might've changed to the point where they don't need me anymore since they hired someone to do my work while I've been gone.

We'll see what happens. I'm not losing sleep over it now. I'm accepting whatever happens is for the best. I'm in a good mood since we got our house re-appraised at a higher value that just gave us an opportunity to shave off a few hundred $ each monthly payment. It is a dream come true just knowing we have that extra needed money to spend elsewhere with the baby on the way.

[musicmama08]

musicmama08 - Crystal: 11/18, baby 2, had the last one at home, but having this one with midwifes at the hospital.  Hoping for the most natural birth / intervention-free as possible.

[Ablemec]

Birdhappy - so glad you were able to see your therapist and create a plan.  And even better that news about your house!  Have you considered, in the event you don't stay with your job, doing both COBRA and DH's insurance?  That is, get yourself onto DH's insurance so you'll have that for after baby is born, but get on COBRA until the birth so you're not out the thousands that the home birth would cost (only the hundreds for COBRA)?  Then as soon as the baby is born, you can cancel COBRA?  Just a thought.  

You sound like you're in a slightly better place than your last post, and I hope the therapy appointment helped.  A big hug!  

[KaliShanti]

I know this sounds selfish, but I really miss having a baby shower this time around! I don't really need that much, just a few items, but I love the fellowship & celebration that comes with a shower. :(

[jbk21]

Originally Posted by MrsKatie 

jbk - Your optimism re: my impending labor and birth is super encouraging!  I was measuring 33 cm yesterday, while I measured 35 at my last appointment.  So baby has definitely dropped!  Gonna go eat some more now...  Also, how's your cervix?  I haven't experienced anything like that but it sure does sound normal to me.

Jaimee - I hope you're napping as I type this!

Amanda - I dunno girl, sounds like our time is coming up fast!

I slept till noon today.  NOON.  Not sure when I fell asleep cause I've been strict about not watching the clock at night anymore.  It just stresses me out.  But my dad called at noon and I decided to get up.  I also used to get all pissy about sleeping late cause I'm normally an enthusiastic morning person but DH keeps telling me not to think about ANYTHING but sleeping when I can and eating enough.  I'm gonna go ahead and follow his advice - he never leads me wrong.  Nice that he's taking over nesting duties, too!

Katie- yay that baby dropped!  I wish my baby would drop.  Ugh.  Did that help with heartburn, too?  My cervix is feeling fine today.  Must have just been agitated.  On one hand I was kinda hoping she "woke it up" you know?  But I've got plenty of time for that.

Originally Posted by MrsKatie 

I know this isn't healthy for me, but I don't know how to let go of my feelings towards her.  I could write a novel on why she pisses me off so badly, but you guys don't need to hear that.  But she is the single biggest point of contention between me and DH and I'm petrified of life with a baby in this house with that woman.

Oh man.  That totally sucks.  I can't imagine being in your situation but if I were I would have definitely had DH sit down and talk to her.  Why is it a point of contention between you and DH?  Does he not feel the same about her?  Luckily my DH and I are on the same page with his crazy parents, so I can't imagine if we weren't.  I just can't keep things like that to myself, you know?  But maybe if he doesn't say anything to her you could let her know, calmly, something like "I appreciate your concern but I have done a lot of research in this area and DH and I feel very comfortable with the decisions we are making for the baby" . If that doesn't shut her up, then I might be known to freak out a bit....

Originally Posted by birdhappy85 

As for my work dilemma... Thanks to all for the responses. I'll try to respond to a few questions I saw. In regards to me being able to get on DH's health insurance if I lost my job: Yes, I would be able to. However, his insurance likely wouldn't cover my home birth, and I was actually lucky enough to get my current insurance company to approve to cover my home birth as in-network. So we'd be out thousands of dollars... Which would really be upsetting, as you can imagine, considering having that happen would be just weeks shy of the birth. In regards to KayPea's question about PPD. Oh yes, I'm nervous about that one. I've had the worst prenatal depression and anxiety... My doctors and midwives have pretty much agreed I'm really likely to have PPD based on my history. I'm just optimistic and hopeful right now that it won't be so bad because I'm going the placenta encapsulation route and have heard hopeful things about that helping keep depression at bay. I don't know how likely it is to work, though... I've spent this whole pregnancy telling my health care providers that I don't think I'll be back to normal after the pregnancy is over, but they give me mixed messages about things just because what they've witnessed from me is an exacerbation in mental health problems due to the hormones. I don't know what to think! Should I expect best case scenario or prepare for the worst? There isn't much I can do one way or another in the meantime.

Luckily my therapist was able to get me in to see her last night and go over the letter from my work and come up with a plan. I wrote a letter to my work today requesting an additional leave of absence, explained briefly what for, and stated a return date of January 16, 2012. That would give me about 8 weeks postpartum to readjust with hormones and stuff. I guess that's all I can do right now and see what they say. This company doesn't seem to be out to get me. They're family friendly in some ways so I can't see them honestly forcing me to come back at 38 weeks pregnant. But then again, I haven't been there in almost 3 months and my position might've changed to the point where they don't need me anymore since they hired someone to do my work while I've been gone.

We'll see what happens. I'm not losing sleep over it now. I'm accepting whatever happens is for the best. I'm in a good mood since we got our house re-appraised at a higher value that just gave us an opportunity to shave off a few hundred $ each monthly payment. It is a dream come true just knowing we have that extra needed money to spend elsewhere with the baby on the way.

I know this is kind of a crap shoot, but just so you know it's an option.... IF you are bumped onto DH's insurance and they refuse to cover the home birth it is possible for you to write them a letter after the birth, detailing your baby's health and how they were birthed at home.  You can include documentation from doctors and whatever, and request that they cover it just as they would have covered a hospital birth.  You can even detail the cost difference since home births are cheaper.  Then see what happens.  I know someone who did that and the insurance company covered her home birth 100%.  
 

[MrsKatie]

birdhappy - thanks.  We will be moving out pretty soon, in February or March at the latest.  We have had a million long conversations about moving earlier, and always come around to the same conclusion; that it would be best to stay till February at least.  We will have enough saved up, I will have had the baby here at this birth center (which is 100% covered by my insurance, and where I'm very settled and comfortable), the holidays will be done.  The thing is, we're moving 2 hours away when we DO move, so it will be a huge upheaval in many ways.  I can white-knuckle it 4 more months, I guess...

jbk - YES, no more heartburn!!!  It's such an enormous relief.  I've had it a tiny bit once or twice in the last couple weeks, but mostly it's gone.  As for grandma being a point of contention, I think maybe that was too strong a word... my husband DOES agree with me 100%, but he also recognizes that I react to her much more strongly than is reasonable (and I agree), because her personality and mine simply don't mix.  He sees clearly how annoying she is, but she's his grandma, and he has his history with her, and he is able to shrug off her annoying habits and see them as humorous or benign, where I respond by wanting to rip her face off.  So it's not necessarily a point of contention, but more a point of stress, because he hates to see me so upset and he wants so badly to help me calm down and deal with her rationally, where I lose all ability to be calm and rational when she says something that pisses me off (seriously, I usually just start crying immediately because she makes me so mad).  She's not a bad person by any means; that would be a whole 'nother issue.  She's just crazy-making.  And when she's talking in a relentless stream of closed-minded comments and unresearched opinions, he is very good at shrugging it off and/or ignoring her (he's much better at this than her own daughter is; I've seen my poor MIL get driven to the edge by her many times), so he doesn't get bothered the way I do.  Where I want to start throwing things at her.

[seraf]

Katie, I think boiling blood is normal at the end of pregnancy but I have 2 words of advice for you.  MINI-FRIDGE and HOTPLATE.  Good luck.

[berry987]

Okay, finally adding my name to the list (just in the nick of time!)

berry987-Lindsey: 11/2, #4, hospital birth (I think I finally have the confidence to have a natural hospital birth after two homebirths; we recently moved to a new state and I couldn't find a midwife I liked as much as my previous midwife, but I did find an OB I love....so hospital birth it is!)

[dashley111]

Originally Posted by seraf 

Katie, I think boiling blood is normal at the end of pregnancy but I have 2 words of advice for you.  MINI-FRIDGE and HOTPLATE.  Good luck.

Yes! And a microwave if you can squeeze one in?  Your shouldn't need much more.

[IwannaBanRN]

Katie, I know how you feel about living with someone that makes your blood boil almost upon entering the same room as them. Especially while pregnant. Only add in an emotionally abusive partner who makes your feelings invalid when you get upset. Do you know how much longer you'll have to be in her house?

AFM- DH and I dtd last night and I don't think I'll mind hanging up the hat as far as not doing that until after the baby comes. I was so miserable with contractions afterwards. I actually fell asleep waiting for the contractions to go away. lol

[TalkToMeNow]

Katie, I'm sorry you are having to deal with your dh's grandmother. That is no fun. At least there is an end in sight! 

I fought off my yucky feeling yesterday and managed to clean the entire house from top to bottom. Okay, maybe not entire... I skipped the kids' rooms and basement. They can do that themselves! But I cleaned every room I see/ hang out in. And did a super thorough job. It wasn't really nesting since I had no real drive to do it. I only had an urge to sit on my butt all day! But I've been letting things go, and it started to get to me yesterday. 

Of course, I'm paying for the cleaning now. My lower back is killing me! I guess that's what I get for vacuuming the stairs.

I'm off to read to dd2's class. She picked a Skippyjon Jones book because, according to the kids, I have the best Skippyjon Jones voice in the universe. Then, tonight is the school's Fall Festival. One of the volunteer things I'm doing is face painting. I have no face painting skills. It will be as follows: kid- "I want a butterfly!" me- "Well, you're getting a big purple blob cause that's all I do." 

[jbk21]

Originally Posted by MrsKatie 

jbk - YES, no more heartburn!!!  It's such an enormous relief.  I've had it a tiny bit once or twice in the last couple weeks, but mostly it's gone.  As for grandma being a point of contention, I think maybe that was too strong a word... my husband DOES agree with me 100%, but he also recognizes that I react to her much more strongly than is reasonable (and I agree), because her personality and mine simply don't mix.  He sees clearly how annoying she is, but she's his grandma, and he has his history with her, and he is able to shrug off her annoying habits and see them as humorous or benign, where I respond by wanting to rip her face off.  So it's not necessarily a point of contention, but more a point of stress, because he hates to see me so upset and he wants so badly to help me calm down and deal with her rationally, where I lose all ability to be calm and rational when she says something that pisses me off (seriously, I usually just start crying immediately because she makes me so mad).  She's not a bad person by any means; that would be a whole 'nother issue.  She's just crazy-making.  And when she's talking in a relentless stream of closed-minded comments and unresearched opinions, he is very good at shrugging it off and/or ignoring her (he's much better at this than her own daughter is; I've seen my poor MIL get driven to the edge by her many times), so he doesn't get bothered the way I do.  Where I want to start throwing things at her.

OMG I can't wait until this heartburn goes away.  Ugh.

I see what you mean with DH and you having different reactions to her.  DH and I both think his parents are crazy and we can't stand them but sometimes they say something that really gets me going and he doesn't really see the crazy in it- I have to point it out.  He's just used to some things they say and do. I think that's how it must be with your DH too.  I don't know how you live with her, I would be going nuts (well, I guess you are going nuts too :-))  Big hugs!  You'll be moving to Portland in late winter?  We should get our babes together with the other Portland mamas from our DDC.  That'd be so fun :-)  If you need help with houses or neighborhoods let me know!    We moved cross-country and luckily our friends who were here checked out houses for us (we rent, though) and we moved into our house based on their approval- sight unseen for us :-)  
 

Originally Posted by IwannaBanRN 

Katie, I know how you feel about living with someone that makes your blood boil almost upon entering the same room as them. Especially while pregnant. Only add in an emotionally abusive partner who makes your feelings invalid when you get upset. Do you know how much longer you'll have to be in her house?

AFM- DH and I dtd last night and I don't think I'll mind hanging up the hat as far as not doing that until after the baby comes. I was so miserable with contractions afterwards. I actually fell asleep waiting for the contractions to go away. lol

I so want to hang up that hat.  Lol!  I like the IDEA of sex but it is just never what it should be, lol.  Bless my DH, though, he tries.  It's not his fault.  It's just this huge belly, lol!

[jbk21]

Skippyjon Jones!  Love those books, Amanda!  Have fun!

[IwannaBanRN]

Originally Posted by jbk21 

I so want to hang up that hat.  Lol!  I like the IDEA of sex but it is just never what it should be, lol.  Bless my DH, though, he tries.  It's not his fault.  It's just this huge belly, lol!

lol Yes, the idea is better than the experience this far into it. I know this is TMI but oh well(hey we're talking about mucous coming out of us, how much more tmi could THAT be?) we were missionary last night and I could. not. breath! I had to move. Poor DH. lol

[IwannaBanRN]

This is so sad and one reason why I won't give my son the Hep B vaccine.

http://iansvoice.org/default.aspx

[MrsKatie]

Originally Posted by seraf 

Katie, I think boiling blood is normal at the end of pregnancy but I have 2 words of advice for you.  MINI-FRIDGE and HOTPLATE.  Good luck.

Wow, it's like you read my mind - DH JUST drug in the mini-fridge and a microwave from storage! No hot plate (and no place to put one) but this will make a HUGE difference.  At least I can store snacks down here and limit my upstairs trips as much as possible!

Originally Posted by jbk21 

OMG I can't wait until this heartburn goes away.  Ugh.I see what you mean with DH and you having different reactions to her.  DH and I both think his parents are crazy and we can't stand them but sometimes they say something that really gets me going and he doesn't really see the crazy in it- I have to point it out.  He's just used to some things they say and do. I think that's how it must be with your DH too.  I don't know how you live with her, I would be going nuts (well, I guess you are going nuts too :-))  Big hugs!  You'll be moving to Portland in late winter?  We should get our babes together with the other Portland mamas from our DDC.  That'd be so fun :-)  If you need help with houses or neighborhoods let me know!    We moved cross-country and luckily our friends who were here checked out houses for us (we rent, though) and we moved into our house based on their approval- sight unseen for us :-)  

I will DEFINITELY take you up on your offer.  We are trying to figure out where to buy a house and would love some input.  We are planning on renting for a couple months at least so we can get a feel for the city and figure out exactly where we want to buy, and we would love all the help we can get!  I can't wait to live there!  And a Portland mamas get-together would be amazing, I am so excited!

I'm feeling better today.  At 38 weeks, the weepiness definitely has not left me.  I went for a walk yesterday and started bawling whenever I had a sentimental thought or memory.  And when DH came home from work and asked me how I was feeling I started in again.  It's intense!

[MrsKatie]

Originally Posted by IwannaBanRN 

This is so sad and one reason why I won't give my son the Hep B vaccine.

http://iansvoice.org/default.aspx

OMG you need to warn us that those pics are so graphic!
 

So warning: GRAPHIC AWFUL photos on this site.  And yes, it's heartbreaking and I need no more convincing.

[jbk21]

Originally Posted by MrsKatie 

OMG you need to warn us that those pics are so graphic! 

So warning: GRAPHIC AWFUL photos on this site.  And yes, it's heartbreaking and I need no more convincing.

OMG thanks for the warning, katie!  I won't be clicking on it now.  I can't handle graphic photos! 

[Jaimee]

Originally Posted by IwannaBanRN 

This is so sad and one reason why I won't give my son the Hep B vaccine.

http://iansvoice.org/default.aspx