Good news: we had an honest talk yesterday about how she feels about her body, and she is very very gung-ho to start walking with me, and mentioned even trying out running (GOOD! we can do it together!). The appointment has been made for the doc for blood work requisitions, and we are on our way, just like that. She was grateful that I approached her, and it didn't hurt her as I thought it would.
that's great news!!! I'm so glad you guys were able to have an honest conversation and make a basic plan!
Something I've found helpful in talking to my own DDs about a lot of different subjects is called "non-violent communication." It's a style of listening and responding to what is being said in ways that let the other person know that you really hear them. There are a couple of good books on it.
As a mother to 2 daughters and someone with a poor body image, I can only image in how you must feel and disagree so strongly with the people that are saying the she is heathy at her weight and leave her alone. The world doesn't treat overweight people the same and it isn't healthy to be overweight. Why would you want your DD's life to me any more difficult than it has to be. I think you shoudl talk to your Dr. and talk to her about her weight from a health perspective, not a weight loss perspective but I think it should be address.
Body image isn't tied to weight -- as some of the people with eating disorders can testify. There are lots of skinny woman who hate themselves. There are also women with curves who love themselves.
I think that how we are treated it tied more to what we project we believe about ourselves than our weight. So yes, someone who is overweight and hates themselves or their body is more likely to be treated badly, but there are a lot of big woman with confidence who project acceptance and self love, and they get that back.
I agree that all things being equal, being neither thin or fat is healthier than the extremes, but I strongly, strongly feel that no matter our DDs sizes, the best thing we can teach our DDs is to just love themselves. Unconditionally. Part of loving ourselves including our bodies healthy foods, and part of loving ourselves in finding ways we love to move that let us feel more alive. And part of it is speaking kindly to ourselves when we look in the mirror.
I lost 70 pounds. And I'm the exact same person I was before. Nothing in my life changed. I'm now a yoga teacher and I really love it, and I couldn't have got through yoga teacher training at my previous shape. And we hike a lot of weekends and I couldn't have done that before, and I really enjoy it. But I am just me. Life is easier when we love ourselves -- but skinny people still have problems and overweight people who blame their weight for their problems are just making excuses. Every one has problems.
I currently LOVE to teach yoga to women who are over-weight or are new to exercise. I really thrive on helping women connect to their bodies and listen to themselves. I don't teach weight loss yoga, I teach women to be kind to themselves -- no matter what their weight or current fitness level. Just move a little bit -- breathe -- notice how you feel. Repeat.