My situation, in a nutshell. I have been divorced for 7 months, separated for almost 2 years. In that 2 years, the longest that XDH has paid child support consistently is maybe three months. He doesn't pay for insurance or clothes or food or anything else for the kids (they're five and three) and he doesn't participate in their lives beyond his one visitation day every week. I have been looking for work for all but two months since we split up; I have been very, very blessed with friends and family who have helped me provide for my kids when I couldn't and when their father wouldn't, but they can't do everything for us. We are living with my mom, she is paying all the bills and giving me what she can toward gas, she can't provide all the clothes and all the other basic stuff kids need on top of keeping a roof over our heads. The ex refused to help with DD's school uniforms and supplies back at the beginning of August, and mom stretched her budget to the limits to get them for her, she goes above and beyond, but there are times when she just can't do it, and right now is one of those times.Â
I was only getting $100 a week from the ex, but it was making the difference between being able to get the kids what they need, on a limited basis, and not being able to get them anything. DH quit paying his full amount around the beginning of August, then quit paying at all the beginning of September, we haven't had a dime in six weeks. Over the last few weeks, DH has become severely ill, to the point of being in ICU for a few days, and has either quit or lost his job, not sure which because he doesn't feel that it's necessary to discuss such matters, or any other matters, with me. He's somewhere in the neighborhood of $2,000 behind, most of which was accrued well before he got sick. Which brings us to our court date. It is Monday, and I have a really bad feeling about it. I think that my ex is going to either roll into court in a wheelchair, playing the wounded warrior to the hilt, and the judge is going to grant him all the time in the world to get himself in order before he has to worry himself about child support again, or he's not going to show at all, and I am going to have to be the grown-up, as usual, and explain everything that has been happening to him. Which will end with the same results, me looking like an idiot and a b@*ch for trying to drag the ex into court when he's such a sick man. I can't drop the court date, I've already done it once and XDH took it as a sign that he can do anything he wants and I'll just back off and let him. Is there anybody who's been through this and come out of it on the winning side, or should I just prepare myself to eat crow?
