Poll: Who's going to find out the gender? - Page 3 « Back to Group Discussions

[Astraia]

I think you're right, Sandy- if I just made the decision, firmly, I'd feel a lot better about it. I keep saying, "I'm almost definitely sure we're not going to find out... probably" and then I have to think about it even more. As far as my husband knows, we're not finding out. I talked it over with him weeks ago and he reluctantly agreed not to find out, and as far as he knows it's a closed subject. It's just in MY head that all this is going on!

I really don't want to find out. Curiosity won't kill me... heck, if I can make it to 20 weeks without knowing, what's another 20 weeks, right?!

Wondering what i should tell my family. They won't take it well (they're weird like that). Considering saying baby just didn't cooperate...? It will avoid a lot of the "but WHY NOT!?!?" discussions that I totally don't have the energy for. I have enough decisions to justify as it is (you're doing ANOTHER home birth!?! You're going to have your KIDS THERE?!?!)

[alittlesandy]

Originally Posted by Astraia 

Wondering what i should tell my family. They won't take it well (they're weird like that). Considering saying baby just didn't cooperate...? It will avoid a lot of the "but WHY NOT!?!?" discussions that I totally don't have the energy for. I have enough decisions to justify as it is (you're doing ANOTHER home birth!?! You're going to have your KIDS THERE?!?!)

I hear you on this point. Our decision to not find out the first time around (or share our list of names) created a huge rift between my MIL and I that still exists to some degree. And then, of course, I had a boy, which was not what she was hoping for 

[SaguaroMoon]

This is our first, and we definitely want to wait to be surprised! I was sure of that, DH was on the fence - until our midwife talked about how much more fun it is to find out ourselves. She said something to the effect of, "It's great when the baby comes out, and you say, "What is it?" and I say, "It's a baby!" and then you get to look and find out the gender for yourself." Now we're both excited to wait!

Another reason I want to wait - and I know it's a little silly - is I don't want a bunch of gender stereotyped stuff. Loads of people have already said they can't wait to get us stuff for the baby, which is really lovely and sweet, and I'm very grateful for that. However, I don't like the idea of color-coding humans by gender, and I'd like to avoid a bunch of "princess" stuff or an all-sports motif.  My friend just had her baby, and for the baby shower, she said EVERYTHING had footballs and soccer balls on it - and neither she or her husband even have any interest in sports!

I know we're going to have to deal with these kind of things as the baby gets older, but it would be nice if she/he could start life not being immersed in stereotypes.

[Mami_Feliz]

I would quite like a surprise this time (I found out with my first two from the ultrasounds). However, both the boys really want a little sister, so I'd like to get a chance to prepare them in the case that they're going to get a little brother. So, yes I'll find out.

[Rowdie]

This is my first and I'm going for the surprise.

Also, as Saguaro mentioned, I'd rather not foist gender expectations on the poor thing still in utero. S/he'll get enough later on.  So when Mom, quilter extraordinaire asked for colors I told her greens, yellows--heck, don't limit yourself!

[alittlesandy]

Yes, I hate the overtly pink princess stuff and blue sports stuff. That's one of the reasons we avoided finding out the gender and may do the same this time. We got the cutest gender-neutral stuff with our first. Zoo animals, sea creatures, jungle animals, lovely colors (greens, blues, yellows, reds, primary colors, etc.).

[forestmushroom]

haha!  I think it is fair to say "baby just didn't cooperate" Or the "tech couldn't be sure because baby was in a bad position"

I also think it is fair to find out, but not tell anyone else... because of the whole overly blue or pink thing...

I prefer the gender neutral stuff, too!  And little boys look so cute in purple, but if people know, they never give you boy stuff that is purple...

As well as little girls looking so cute in blue, orange (every other color that isn't pink!)

I talk myself in and out of finding out, too...

ugh.  At first I was not going to find out, and just see if I could guess based on the scan... but man, there are so many surprises besides baby's sex... and now I am so curious.  It makes picking a name easier, too! 

As we get closer to actually having the scan... I am weaker in my resolve. 

[janellody]

It's so funny how different we can all be.. I prefer gender stuff and NOT neutral stuff... haha!  I want boy or girl things :)

[sarahamecke]

DH & I had both previously thought it would be cool to wait until birth to find out the sex, but that all changed when I actually got pregnant!  I have some medical problems that are FAR less likely to be passed on to a boy than a girl, so I am strongly hoping to have a boy.  I decided that since there is a 50/50 chance of it being a girl, I would rather find out in advance so I can have time to mentally prepare myself for that possibility before birth.  We find out on December 20th, when I will be at 20 weeks, and I'm SO nervous!  I can hardly wait for the time to pass...

[licadee]

We didn't find out with our first and really enjoyed that. This time I want to know what it's like to know. Hopefully find out a week from tomorrow!