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Jaspers here, emergency c-section and in the NICU :( - Page 2

post #21 of 167
Thread Starter 

Popping in because if I dont share this with you guys Im going to wake my husband with my screaming:

I just had the best pumping session yet!!

 

 

I found a position that works a lot better, now that my pain is like...non-exsistant....I am able to lean way forward and rest the pumps on my knees.

 

In 10 minutes I had 7 ML (my most yet!!!) and had barely any milk backed up against my nipples and the flange!!

Im so excited and releaved and Im feeling really really positive now!

I hope this keeps up.

 

Im going to look into getting some Fenugreek to help my milk production...IM JUST SO EXCITED I WANT TO JUMP UP AND DOWN!!!

 

post #22 of 167

i'm so happy for you!! pumping will be a really helpful thing for you to do even for yourself until you get your wee one back home in your arms.

Also try goats rue, borage, and blessed thistle!

post #23 of 167

Dragonfly, you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers-- including thanksgiving for a strong-willed little man and good pumping!  Congratulations and I hope the rest is over soon, soon, soon.

post #24 of 167

Congratulations on your adorable boy!  I'm so sorry that he's in the hospital and you aren't able to be with him all the time - that must be so hard - but it sounds like he is making good progress and getting stronger by the hour.  Sending healing thoughts to your family!

post #25 of 167

grouphug.gif to you mama, I am so sorry for everything you are going through right now. 

post #26 of 167
Quote:
Originally Posted by DragonflyMom View Post

Popping in because if I dont share this with you guys Im going to wake my husband with my screaming:

I just had the best pumping session yet!!

 

YAY!

post #27 of 167

Congrats mama! Sorry things aren't working out the way you want them to, but just know that very soon you will be taking your little guy home!! Yay!!!!!! for a good pumping session energy.gif

post #28 of 167
Thread Starter 

Thank you to everyone, I really appreciate all the well wishes and encouragements!

Its so nice to be able to come here and vent and be understood!!

 

My last two pumping sessions I have gotten 5ML out of each breast and Im pretty sure its moving on to milk....its not sticky and like the colostrum, is more watery and moves more freely into the containers and its more a creamy color.

 

My Earth Momma, Angel Baby nipple butter is working MIRACLES on my boobs and I found a position that, while I still think I need a smaller flange, I can pump without pain or the milk backing up in the flange and spilling out.

 

I just feel so much more positive about everything today!!

 

I did have a horrific nighmare last night, I woke up at 4 am screaming for Charlie and yelling "No!! Fix him!!"

 

Yeah...you get what I was dreaming right? Because I dont want to type it.

 

Charlie was lying next to me and I scared the shit out of him, he thought I was hurt.

 

I ended up having a mini-panic attack for a few minutes until I realized it was just a dream.

 

Charlie got up and called the NICU for an update just to ease me some more....Jasper is doing just fine, he is still on 30% oxygen but they have him in an open crib and he is maintaining his temp on his own.

 

Im going to go take a short nap,I felt great last night, pumping every 2 hours but now its caught up with me and Im a bit tired, then we are going to go spend the afternoon with Jasper.

 

I cant wait to see him :)

post #29 of 167

Hugs, mama. And congratulations, though it sounds almost unbearably hard right now.

post #30 of 167

So sorry for all the hurdles right now- it sounds like it must be so difficult.  But I'm glad to hear things are starting to feel better for you.  And it sounds like your little guy is doing a lot better.  Congrats on your new little fighter!  Can't wait to hear when you get to bring him home for constant snuggles smile.gif  Enjoy your afternoon with him!

post #31 of 167
Oh man, I just want to give you my phone number so you can call and commiserate! This is so, so similar to Corbin's after-birth story. You are not alone, and whatever you are feeling is totally justified and normal. We've been out of the NICU for three weeks and I'm still furious over how things went down.

Our hospital had five "parent rooms" (closets with beds) that parents could stay in to be closer to their babies. Even though we only lived ten minutes away, they let us have one since I tried to be present at every single feeding. There was also an onsite residence house thing (similar to Ronald McDonald house) where other parents were staying - is there anything like that you guys could do? Check with the NICU charge nurse. However, no one left us alone at the freaking hospital. Between chaplains, case workers, parent coordinators... There were a lot of resources. I'm sure your hospital is similar.
post #32 of 167
Thread Starter 


 

fQuote:
Originally Posted by AKChix0r View Post

Oh man, I just want to give you my phone number so you can call and commiserate! This is so, so similar to Corbin's after-birth story. You are not alone, and whatever you are feeling is totally justified and normal. We've been out of the NICU for three weeks and I'm still furious over how things went down.

Our hospital had five "parent rooms" (closets with beds) that parents could stay in to be closer to their babies. Even though we only lived ten minutes away, they let us have one since I tried to be present at every single feeding. There was also an onsite residence house thing (similar to Ronald McDonald house) where other parents were staying - is there anything like that you guys could do? Check with the NICU charge nurse. However, no one left us alone at the freaking hospital. Between chaplains, case workers, parent coordinators... There were a lot of resources. I'm sure your hospital is similar.


 

Im so sorry you had a similairly rough experience but Im happy to hear your man is home!!

 

The childrens hospital does not have any way to let me room in and the Ronald house is full up...and I really hope this does not make me a bad mom.....but Im so much more relaxed at home then I was at the hospital anyway.

 

A big part of that is the not being let alone for 5 freaking minutes, I have body image issues and I really think that not having any privacy played a big role in the breast pumping issues I was having.

 

 

Last night I was able to relax and get comfy and pumping went AMAZING, especially compared to what it was.

 

So Im thinking we will just drive in every afternoon and spend the day there, then come home at night...god, I hope that does not make me cruel :(

 

I want nothing more than to having him with me 24/7...he is doing great so hopefully he will get out sooner than planned!

post #33 of 167

Hugs to you, Dragonfly!  I'm so sorry this birth experience wasn't what you expected, and I'm thinking of you that the NICU stay is very short and you'll be able to hold him non-stop very very soon.  You are very courageous and brave- keep it up.  We're all thinking of you!

post #34 of 167

Dragonfly, it does NOT make you cruel to leave at night to be home, where you can take care of yourself too. Jasper is being well cared for at the NICU, and its where he needs to be right now. I agree that the hospital was not a comfortable or relaxing place for me at all. I am very sensitive to all that stimulation and have a hard time ignoring the people all around and constant interruptions. SO glad to hear that the pumping is going well. It can give you a way to stay connected to your little guy when you are home.

 

You need to be healthy and rested in order to be a good mom. You are in this for the long haul and you must take care of yourself in order to be there for Jasper. And while this is an extreme situation, a similar balance (or, I should say, a striving for balance) goes on throughout your kids' lives in various ways.

post #35 of 167

dragonfly - I cried as I read your story but your updates are so positive & encouraging. Pumping & feeding with large breasts definitely has it's challenges but once you figure out how to work with them it gets easier (I'm currently a G cup). Best wishes he's out & in your arms real quick.

post #36 of 167

hug2.gifIt's going to be ok.  Everyone else here has great advice.  

post #37 of 167
We were in the hospital for ten days with DS and I had the same emotional meltdowns. Three and a half years later, I don't think of it anymore. Alexander loves his mama, like nothing else. Your baby knows his mama and will love you just the same, breastmilk or formula, skin to skin now or in ten days.

Congrats on your gorgeous baby boy!
post #38 of 167

Hey I just wanted to pop on here and give you some encouragement.

 

First of all, I TOTALLY get where you're coming from, even the excitedness (is that a word? LOL) over the breastmilk amount. I have a picture from my LO's NICU days where I'm giving the camera a HUGE smile and thumbs up while holding my 7 MLs of colostrum, LOL. You're doing awesome!!

 

Secondly, you are not a bad mom for not being there 24/7!! We were able to room-in just off the NICU (we lived 6 hours away, though) and even then we weren't there all the time.....it gets really overwhelming and stifling to be in that environment for too long. I know that's not really your case, but seriously, just the fact that you WANT to be there means you're an awesome mom! I know of a baby who was left in my hometown NICU and her parents lived a province away (I'm in Canada) but they couldn't (/wouldn't?) make the trip to where she was until she was ready to go home, which could have taken 3 months, she was really premature. I saw her on my hospital tour for my prenatal classes and I bawled my eyes out when I got home! But as much as I wanted to be angry at her parents, I'm sure there were reasons (probably monetary) that meant that they couldn't be there. There are parents all over the place that just leave their babies in the NICU (yes, I'm serious).

 

I can totally relate to how you're feeling right now, it's so hard to feel like their mother when you're not there all the time or attending to all of their needs. My LO was hooked up to....a shit-ton of tackle (we're talking respirator, oxygen, cathetor, 3 IVs....etc.) and it was heartbreaking that when we got to "hold him", it was basically them (and I say "them" because we needed a nurse and a RT) placing him on a nursing pillow on my lap. I couldn't move him at all, no skin-to-skin, and I had to stay like that for at least an hour. That was so hard.

 

BUT on a positive note, the fact that your doctors are "up beat and positive" is a HUGE sign of awesome. It's when they aren't up beat and positive that you have to be worried. (Yep, that happened to us too. But even when they delivered bad news, I gotta say, they were very very good about it).

 

Anyway, hold on there mama, I promise that this NICU stay will just be a blip in his life, even though it feels like years now. If you ever want to vent, talk, whatever, feel free to email me: olivia_j_greenham@hotmail.com

 

Take care! <3

post #39 of 167

Just wanted to pop in and say that you might try finding different size flanges for your pump ... I'm also very busty, and the 24mm ones that come standard with Medela pumps don't work for me. I use the 27mm. Also, if you're getting chafed you might want to try putting some olive oil on your nipples before you pump; it helps a lot!

 

In addition, as your milk turns from colostrum into regular milk, you'll start producing more. Hang in there!

post #40 of 167

You are not cruel at all!  Jasper is getting the care he needs - now you need to take care of yourself so that you can continue to be the mommy he needs.  And pumping is such hard work, and very emotional - do whatever you need to do to make that work for you.   :)

 

Just out of curiosity, is your back pain in your upper back?  I had horrible back pain after my c-section, and I was afraid it was from being in bed so much, but the nurse told me that it is referred pain from air that gets inside during the surgery.  It migrates upward and irritates nerves, causing upper back/shoulder pain.  Not that it makes it feel any better to know this, but I was glad to know that I wasn't going to develop a back problem on top of everything else, and it did go away completely after a few days.

 

Also, Percoset, while great for pain, gave me nightmares (really vivid, bad ones) and made me itch.  I switched to Norco and felt so much better.

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